Aibu-Allowing d's to wear knee high boots for school

[Shippers87]

Posting here for opinions as I'm annoyed at the attitude of the teachers at my dd's school.

She is 6 years old and we bought her some black flat boots that sit just under the knee for school on days where it is cold/wet/windy as frankly the Mary Jane style shoes that are normally sold for girls are not suitable for this weather.

School assistant has kept asking my dd where her shoes are and went on to say she can't wear her boots.

It does not say this in the school uniform rules. Nor are they not practical as she is comfier in them than normal school shoes.

So I said next time they ask for my dd to tell the teacher that I let her wear them.

They have now told her that she has to wear her pe pumps inside. Which has made her feel sad.

Can they do this ?

I know there is no legislation saying that UK school children have to wear uniform but I feel this is a bit petty seeing as in this day and age you can wear knee high boots in certain workplaces

I don't pick her up/drop her off due to working full time so am thinking of writing a letter as I am unable to speak to them after school

Which shoes are more suitable than boots for cold and wet weather? Genuine question. This makes no sense.

Shoes that cover your whole foot, such as shoes more usually worn by boys (you don’t see boys wearing knee-high boots to school in bad weather).

However the OP has said her DD would refuse to wear such shoes because she is “ridiculously girly”.

Uniform policies are in place at schools so that all kids are ‘uniform’ and don’t feel belittled because they don’t have or can’t afford a wide range of footwear or clothing.

Blind following of stupid rules that only exist for the sake of stupid rules.

No, the vast majority of schools in the UK have a uniform. But not all, so for those who feel their child is being oppresssd by wearing uniform at school (or at brownies, cubs, in sports teams), you always have the option of voting with your feet.

Familyofaliens don't be silly most people don't have the option of a non uniform school.

Blind following of stupid rules that only exist for the sake of stupid rules.

Oh do fuck off, it's about knowing when to pick your battles. Because if you stamp your feet and strop for every tiny little thing, nobody is going to listen when you're actually fighting for something that matters.

A pair of fucking boots is not the hill to die on ffs, but you carry on thinking you're some kind of anarchist for rebelling.

Millenials. Ugh.

🤔

How about putting all that time and energy into figuring out how to feed the starving or curing cancer

Perhaps the most ridiculously over the top thing on the thread.

Uniform policies are in place at schools so that all kids are ‘uniform’ and don’t feel belittled because they don’t have or can’t afford a wide range of footwear or clothing.

Strangely that doesn't pose a problem in all the schools all over the world that don't have uniforms.

Which shoes are more suitable than boots for cold and wet weather?

I don't actually understand the drama over this, surely all OP needs to do is let DD wear her boots for the walk to school then change into shoes when she gets indoors? Much more practical, and helps stop the school floors get filthy quicker in wet weather. It's not wet weather indoors, and if it's raining again by home time, it matters not because her boots are there to change back into.

I'm afraid what comes across is OP would rather please her DD's whims than stick to what school has already stated is their uniform policy. It's really irrelevant what colour a pair of boots are, if boots are not part of the policy!

(And like hell would I be dictated to by my child, I'm the adult and I make the ultimate decisions, it doesn't mean I'm disrespecting my child!)

All rules around uniform are generally arbitrary but they are there to prepare kids for the fact that when in the world of work they will be given a uniform or dress code to adhere to and it will probably be arbitrary as well. I am very lucky that my dds school has a very flexible uniform policy.

UnspiritualHome - sadly in parts of this country it does pose a problem. I know of kids who will skive off school if there is a non-uniform day because they can’t afford the latest fashion.

Knee high boots are more expensive than shoes and the zips can catch on things. Either wear boots to school and change on arrival (this is normal in many countries) or buy winter shoes - they sell girls fit (girls feet aren't quite the same shape typically) closed in shoes in Clark's, dd has them.

There is no need to change from boots to shoes on arrival at school unless we’re talking wellingtons or moon boots in extreme weather. A pair of long or short leather boots is eminently suitable winter footwear - far more so than the ugly and flimsy shoes that are sold in the U.K. (nowhere else) as “school shoes”.

School uniform juste sillier and more outdated as both a concept and in practice....

If the policy says black footwear and no open toes, then OP isn't breaking any rules. The TA can't just make up policy because they personally think the child shouldn't wear boots.
School shoes are expensive - if you've got ones that are comfy and the child is happy to wear and which meet the colour requirements of the school, then job done.
I certainly wouldn't be throwing away another £40 on shoes rather than boots, for no reason other than TA disapproval.

With all the problems schools are currently encountering, surely they've got more important things to do than moan about footwear which is perfectly serviceable.

All rules around uniform are generally arbitrary but they are there to prepare kids for the fact that when in the world of work they will be given a uniform or dress code to adhere to

Which is a truly irrational argument for having school uniform rules. Most schools in Europe and the US don't have uniforms, yet their alumni somehow seem to cope absolutely fine in later life if they do jobs that require uniforms.

BrightonBB, that's an argument for not having one-off non uniform days, not an argument in favour of uniforms generally. In practice in schools that don't have uniforms the vast majority of pupils end up coming in in jeans most of the time.

@Echobelly
Kickers make incredibly robust footwear for girls

Both my children wear winter boots to school, because even though the boy's shoes are more covered than my girl's, they're not properly waterproof. And we live in Scotland, so this is necessary for about 6 months of the year! Most other children wear boots too, it seems a sensible choice. The school send them out in all but the most extreme rain and snow, they need good sturdy footwear for this. No 'indoor shoe' policy in our school either. I'm glad boots are acceptable here!

Same here @GruciusMalfoy I am baffled by the obsession in English schools for uniforms, haircuts and what's in lunch boxes.

It is not perfect but I thank god weekly for the Scottish school system. Uniforms are worn but not strictly enforced or used to exclude. If you want to take your kid on holiday it's 'have a lovely time'.

There is no problem with boots, apart from according to loads of people on here THE RULES SAY SHOES.

What a way to live.

Familyofaliens don't be silly most people don't have the option of a non uniform school.

Then you have to decide which thing is most important - sticking to school uniform policy, or finding a school that allows your child to wear what they like to school.

Constantly complaining about rules you don’t like and extrapolating this to a wider conspiracy to deny your child freedom of expression just makes you look a fool.

@Ghanagirl - unfortunately kickers super expensive and the one time I found an affordable pair they were too wide for DD's narrow feet. I love the style of them, but sturdy girls' shoes should be available at all price points.

YABU. It’s fine to change into PE plimsoles for the day, they are comfortable and supportive and she will then ‘feel the benefit’ of her warm boots on the journey home. It’s a useful life lesson in the dress codes and mores that apply in many life situations. I don’t think her feeling sad is a big issue here. Hopefully as she gets caught up in the activities of a school, day the feeling will pass.

What has her being sad at pumps got to do with anything? She isn't in a dress up show sitting cross legged on a carpet in knee high boots on and off all day wouldn't be comfortable - a typical lesson is carpet, activity, carpet all day long. It would make kicking other children as you move more likely too.
Walk to school in boots change into shoes collect and change into boots.

My dd wears boots sometimes depending on weather and so do others .
Never had a problem.
They’re smart and tbf there are more kids that wear scruffy black trainers so I’d be really annoyed if they said she couldn’t wear them