to think you shouldn't make sex noises during a guided meditation?

[mammoon]

Just that, really. A man in my meditation class makes these horrendous moaning, sighing, grunting sounds during meditations. Today the instructor asked us to sigh on the out breath and Mr Moans-a-lot really went to town. It was hilarious but also really distracting and gross!

Channel Bob Mortimer, "no need, no neeeeed!" That should do it.

They are probably using the voice noises to hide the fart noises......

Hahahahaha 😁 love this ⬆️

This really made me laugh sorry

Don't get me started with the unnecessary sex noises...

I'm a powerlifter so I go to a gym which is filled with men who also lift (or in some cases think they can lift). Some of them are insufferable!

Sometimes I wonder if they do actually make the same noises when they are having sex I'd just shove a dirty sock in their mouth.

I have been thinking that perhaps I need to start making over the top sounds (think Meg Ryan's fake orgasm from "When Harry Met Sally") to see how they like it!

"Mate, it's yoga, not tennis"

Yes the fart noises! Someone had a coughing fit then farted in my yoga class on Monday during meditation. Put me right off.

An equivalent thing happens at poetry readings and I hate it. If the poet reads an especially moving or meaningful poem, someone (usually a man) will do a horrible satisfied "Mmmmmmmm..." at the end. It means "I want everyone to know how much I appreciate this poem's profundity because I am so sophisticated and deep." Ugh ugh ugh

That sounds icky as hell and very distracting - can you talk to the instructor about it?

I used to have a friend who would make all these little groans of pleasure as he was eating, even if was just cod and chips. He also used to move his fork or spoon up and down after each forkful/spoonful as if he was weighing it up before it went in his gob. That made me feel murderous.

I'd have to stop going - that's gross! Can the instructor not tell him to be quiet or even ask the whole class to be quiet if they don't want to single him out?

I have a relative that makes these grunting sex noises while eating. I can't stand it. It's gross.

Every time yogagrunter starts just let out a long and audible "shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh", hopefully he'll take the not so subtle hint.

Can you habe a word with some of the other women there and next time you can all join in enthusiastically with him and see if he likes it?

I imagine that if he was faced with a room full of women making as much noise as him he might not like it much.

It's kind of the audio equivalent of manspreading

I feel the same way about whistling.

It's absolutely a power thing, same as in tennis. I don't believe for a second that people who screech or grunt when they hit the ball are doing it because it'll put more physical power behind their swing; it's purely a way of putting off their opponent and saying to the audience "I am the most important and powerful person here". Serena Williams does this all the time and it's so transparent.

The same goes for people (mostly men) who do this in a public setting. They want to make their presence felt, take up room and make other people uncomfortable. They want you to defer to them.

At least in tennis it serves a purpose as such - you want the other person to be distracted and to get the upper hand. Nobody's supposed to be winning at meditating.

michaelbaubles very true, and I only used the tennis example to highlight my point as it had already been mentioned. It's a little bit of a dirty tactic but I can see its point.

However, I'd be willing to bet a lot of money that men who do this in public are (consciously or not) doing it to assert dominance over women, particularly if they are in the minority at the time.

It's kind of the audio equivalent of manspreading

I feel the same way about whistling

Sooo with on this, amusedbush (excellent username, BTW)
If pupils do this in my class, I call it the work of the devil and tell them to desist. It raises a laugh as well as a cessation. Interestingly several students in any group hate whistling in class and give me the thumbs up for my intervention.

Counter his groans with shrill, short shrieks. Every single groan he makes, you reply with "EEEE!" See if he falters.

Sounds vile. I definitely think you should speak to the instructor. Also love the idea of doing the same especially as a collective group of women. Very rude. Women would know better.

@BrinkPink
I know exactly what you mean!! Or people that need to utter titbits of info when someone else is talking to a group

There's a woman in my yoga class who makes sex noises. She grunts throughout the yoga class. I want to hit her.

I bet you're not the only one who feels that way.
Can a group of you mention to the instructor that it is grossing you out and distracting you and you are considering giving up.
You pay the same to attend as he does and if you can't meditate because of this entitled idiot then there doesn't seem much point in continuing with the sessions.

If the poet reads an especially moving or meaningful poem, someone (usually a man) will do a horrible satisfied "Mmmmmmmm..." at the end.

That's so gross :(

If it happens again next week I think I'll say something. Maybe just shush him, or tut loudly (I am British, after all). I like the idea of mocking him with even more exaggerated moans and grunts but that might end up backfiring on me!

There is an episode Hollywood Darlings on Netflix that has the issue. The woman who complained got banned from the class, for not focusing on herself or some guff.

It's funny though and worth a watch.

What about at church when a prayer has been said and everyone says "Amen," as you do, then someone else is a bit later than everyone else and pronounces it "Ay.Men"

Pretentious prayer! Who knew it was a thing?