What does an “average” work day look like for your DP?

[tokirara]

Inspired by the other ongoing thread here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3522839-What-does-an-average-work-day-look-like-for-you

Also helpful to state whether you (the mum) is a SAHM or full-time/part-time working parent. And no mudslinging the DHs either way please - let's be kind...

So my DP:

05:00 - wake up and start working (laptop - emails)
06:30 - DS(3) wakes up
07:40 - DP takes DS to nursery
08:10 - DP drops DS off
08:40 - DP arrives in the office
09:00 to 16:30 - usually back to back meetings with half hour lunchtime break
16:30 - work emails
17:15 - leaves to collect DS from nursery
18:15 - reaches home

Days shifts

• up at 4.45am
• leaves for work 5.15am
• starts work at 6.45am
• leaves work at 6.45/7pm
• home at 8ish.

Nights

• up at 4pm
• leaves for work 5.15pm
• starts at 6.45/7pm
• leaves 6.45/7am
• home at 8am

I wake just before 5am
Am in the office by 7am
When I go into the office.
At home similar but no commute.
Pretty boring.

On days I work (6:30am-8pm), he works school hours, roughly 9-2:30 and then does a dim maybe 8-9:30pm. He’s self employed. On every other day (currently I work 3 long days a week), he leaves the house roughly 8:30am and is home at 5. He still does 1-1.5 hours of admin in the evening Monday to Thursday. The weekends we relax and drink wine and have dinner together.

He works away a few days, stays at his mum's.

On those days: up and make her a tea, about 0600.
Off to work before 7
Work from approx 8 until 6. Home and dinner, jobs around the house etc from 7 till bed. She's been in hospital this last month or so so he's been visiting her after, then doing jobs around the house to get it ready for her discharge.

He then works from home a couple of days.

Wake up with the rest of us, around 0630 sadly. Jumps in the shower while I sort breakfast for kids. Then we swap, and I have a shower and dress while he sits with them while they eat, eats himself etc.

We both help kids dress and get ready. He normally then takes kids to school, just round the corner so only takes about 20 mins.

When he gets back he goes upstairs and does a few hours work. Pops down for teas etc, stops for lunch with me and #3. Normally then does some DIY, or goes into town to do some jobs, or get a haircut etc. Comes back, works for an hour, collects kids from school. Does another hour or so, then stops before 5 for dinner etc .

Don’t live with ds but:-

Gets up at 6:45, texts me to get up
Showers, feeds the cats, coffee
8:00am leaves for work
5:30-6:00 gets in, showers etc
7:00 comes to mine if he is and stays over
8:00- cooks by himself/with me
9:00- watches Netflix/film
11:00- goes to bed with an audio book

Occasionally if he hasn’t spent time on the weekend doing it, will spend a few evenings doing accounts etc for the business. (Whilst I yawn next to him, and occasionally help out with something)

Should add every morning he’s up when the youngest is up, 5:45-6:30am, depending and we’re usually heading to bed 9:30-10pm in school nights.

Dh -
Up 4.45 am to shower and dress
5.15 am goes to work
3.30pm comes home
(This is if he's in the office, he works away 2 nights a week and his schedule changes depending on the days work needs.

I work 9am - 3pm 4 days a week and do the school runs and stuff

DH
6:30 - alarm goes off
6:35 - alarm goes off (repeat until 7:00)
7:00 - gets hit over the head with a pillow and hops in the shower
7:15 - we all leave for the day
7:45 - drop DS off at childcare
8:15 - get to work
13:00 - lunch
20:00 - finish work & drive home
20:35/40 - arrive home
20:40/21:00 - eat tea
21:15 - bed

Oh, we both work FT

Up at 6.30, showers, dresses, unloads dishwasher
Leaves for work at 7, gets there just before 9.
Stressful job, back to back meetings, lunch break if he’s lucky
Leaves at 6.15, gets home around 7.45 (faster train on the way home)

I work 8-4.30 so I do dinner on weeknights and try to have it ready for when he gets home as I’m usually starving by then and I like for us to all eat together. Kids are teenagers so take themselves to and from school

My DH works in the creative industries and works for himself, he works hard but he doesn't have to work to a set timetable and tends to get up earlier than me, these days for a coffee and thinking/ planning time, when the kids were wee he used to look after them while I caught up on sleep. He goes into his studio around 10 and comes back anytime between 4 and 6 but he also does some work in the evenings and at weekends, he gets a bit bored and restless sitting relaxing and there's overlap between his work and his hobbies. He takes half days or days off on a whim sometimes, usually if the sun's out but only took two days of when DS3 was born ( and I has a section), he was working on a project with an inflexible deadline. Sometimes being freelance makes things easier, sometimes harder, I think it evens out in the end.

Oysterbabe fucks around on Twitter, bit of colouring in

I must admit I'm keen to see some examples of how DPs (men) work part-time.

Mine works 50 hours a week at min and sometimes sleeps at the flat at the hotel as someone has to be there all night.

I would say on his days off he does:
8 - Rudly awoken by his DP and children
8-9 - doss on phone/sometimes takes kids to school
9-3 - errands and dog walking - probably some Xbox in there
3:30 - get kids from school
3:30-6 arse about with the kids and make tea/mess
6-7 frantically cleans the kitchen/tidies the mess while I bath little and put her to bed
7-9 shouts at the older boys for being too loud and screechy
9-12 play Xbox/ watch tele/ go to bed to disturb his DP/ have sex/ look at brewaries online (not an alcoholic - to buy stock from)
12am - sleep until rudely awakened

I'm a sahm. My DP is a tradesman and owns his own business so days vary but generally, out the house before 8 and home around 5, does emails and phone calls sorting out the next day for an hour or so.

On rare occasions he doesn't have to be anywhere until midday (waiting for materials, other trades to finish up etc) he'll get up with me and take DS to nursery, we'll grab breakfast in the local cafe then he'll go back to sleep for a few hours before he needs to go out. Home around 5/6pm.

Some days he's up and out before 6am and not home til gone 9pm. It all depends what jobs are going on and what the deadlines are. At least 3 times a week he has to go back out in the evening to go look at potential new jobs and provide quotes. I do his invoices/what emails I can (sending over quotes) during the day so he doesn't have too much to do when he gets home.

😂😂 Love this when my hubby is at work I literally have no idea!! He does this

4.30am wake up get dressed, drive to airport, get on plane, get on train, join a ship.
For three weeks he does 8hrs on 4off, 4on then 8off in rotation I think 🤔
Then after 3 weeks he comes home 😂😂😂
When he is home he does the school runs, and then whatever he likes, makes dinner and lunches, does some food shopping, some stuff around the house etc etc

I did his day off because tbh I would assume at work he’s doing boring stuff like serving tables, training staff, buying and tasting beer, texting his DP and wondering why she’s not replying when she’s at work trying to get stuff done

6-6.30: Wakes up, makes his packed lunch and breakfast and my coffee, showers and get dressed,
7.39 - train
9-5 - standard office job, doesn't really take a lunch break.
5.09 - train
6.30ish get home, sometimes makes his own dinner, sometimes there's something left over for him (depending on what boring toddler meal DS has)
7-8 relax/watch TV
8 - usually loads dishwasher/cleans while I do DSs bath
8.30ish - both read DS stories
9 - 10.30ish watch TV (or sometimes we fall asleep while doing bedtime with DS - we cosleep)

I'm a student, DS has 2 days home with me and 3 at nursery. DH takes AL if I need to go to uni when its not a nursery day.

DH usually gets up around 5.30 and leaves at 6am (but some nights he gets up any time from 4am onwards with the baby so I can sleep until he has to leave)
He arrives at work about 7ish. He is a retail manager.
He finishes at 6pm and is home around 7pm where he puts our eldest to bed if I'm busy getting the baby down.
We live a rock n roll lifestyle and both go to bed at 10pm

I'm typically out of house 10.5 hrs on weekdays. Right now I have 4 jobs across multiple sites so little routine. DH's routines as Part-time employed SAHD & WOHD:

2-3 weekdays/wk
6:30am up, breakfast, make kids' lunches, laundry
7:15am shout to kids to be awake
8:25am shoo last kid out door to school
8:35 am off to work (1 km away)
2pm return home, watch telly, work from home
5pm start meal prep
6:30pm tidy up kitchen, watch telly, work at home, in bed by 10

2-3 weekdays/wk
same until 8:25am, and then
8:35 hop on bike for 4-6 hour cycle ride
1-3pm home, eat everything in house, shower, clean bike, doze off watching tv, enjoy his Strava kudos
5pm start cooking meal...

Saturday chores & activities with kids, Sunday club run

My dh works irregular hours/days/months.

His average day is get up with the dc (teens) at 7am to be around while they get ready for school. He makes them a packed lunch. I refuse to do this, hence he's the one to get up with them.

He usually goes back to bed 8am to 9.30am.

Gets up 9.30am, has breakfast, does a bit of email answering, maybe a bit of work at the laptop. Goes to the gym or out to lunch or out to the shops or does something around the house. Does some washing up.

About 3 times per week (varies enormously) goes to work from 3pm to 10pm or 6pm to midnight. Works most weekends, at least 1 day + 1 evening, often 2.

He often cooks when he's home for the evening but can go 14 days straight without being home for dinner.

Works away for a 4-6 week stretch most years.

He leaves the house at 8am
Doesn't get home til gone 7pm
He works 6 days a week.

I also work PT and our DS goes to the childminders on the days we both are at work. I do all the housewife duties and pick up/drop offs.

I work full time from home.

Gets up
Spends about half an hour doing a poo
Gets the children dressed
Goes to work about 8.30 and I assume has coffee/breakfast there
Does something in an office
Gets home about 5.30
Supervises children while I make dinner
Takes children to clubs
Reads stories/does baths/bed time
Tidies up
Watches TV with me for a couple of hours
No idea when he comes to bed

Usually up at 6.50 and very quietly leaves the house. Works at a very heavy physical job all day and is usually home for 5.30/6

Some days he can be gone from 5am till 10 pm depending on jobs and will usually work on Saturdays too.

He comes home wrecked but will always fall in and help with the kids/dinner/bedtime

DP...
7am wakes up feeds dog ( I wake at this time, get kids up, dress youngest - make 2 different breakfasts for them, make 2 different lunches, get kids off to school, DP doesn’t see kids as he’s in bathroom)
DP 7.30 shaves and irons clothes
8am goes to work
Small rushed lunch
7.30pm get gets back - if he’s not away on business or doing his sports 2x a week.
8pm he puts DS to bed.
9.30pm he re-emerges from upstairs, no idea what he does up there.
Much clanging about in the kitchen as he clears away stuff on the drainer. He huffs as if this is very annoying!
9.45pm he eats dinner in the kitchen alone.
10pm he comes into the living room and asks me what I’m doing. Which is usually going to bed! He then works or watches tv or plays computer games.

So.... we don’t really see a lot of each other.

7am leaves the house...45 minute commute
7pm returns home...45 minute commute

Sometimes works from home, sometimes has work events which means he doesn't come home til 11pm

I work 6 hours a week, children are in school, college and university

Dh does most of the childrens evening lifts and can come earlier to take them somewhere with enough notice