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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

2 year old having cup of tea at nursery

363 replies

Pumpkinsoup22 · 02/03/2019 09:46

My dshas just moved out of baby room. When I collected him the other day was told he'd just had a cup of tea and biscuit. I assumed they were role playing and really meant water or milk. However the staff member said no real tea. AIBU to think this isn't really appropriate for 2 year olds.? Before this I've never had any concerns at all with the nursery.

OP posts:
Feb2018mumma · 02/03/2019 13:30

My son is one and will have a cup of decaffeinated tea? Really milky but he loves it!

NabooThatsWho · 02/03/2019 13:31

Tea has high caffeine.

Not if it’s 98% warm milk.

I’d understand the aggro if the toddlers were being given pints of steaming hot builders brew. But it’s a small amount of milky tea.

PinaColada1 · 02/03/2019 13:31

Tea has tanin and caffeine and to spark off a headache the levels are a lot higher than you think. Particularly for a child who has much more sensitivity. It’s a parents choice though. I wouldn’t be judging a parent for giving their kid weak tea once a day.

Smoggle · 02/03/2019 13:31

Nurseries don't give children juice, squash or pop so it's odd they would give tea.

I'm a childminder and haven't even considered giving tea to toddlers Confused

You wouldn't give tea and biscuits for a snack if Ofsted were in, so why do it at all?

PompeyBez · 02/03/2019 13:31

I wouldn't be happy about this at all. NHS guidelines clearly state not to give tea and coffee to young children. My son is almost 6 and has never had either. I would expect the nursery to be aware of these guidelines. They should at least ask your permission first so that you can make an informed choice for YOUR child. Nice to see the "it didn't do me any harm" brigade out in full force. What may have been seen as ok in the 70s isn't necessarily so now. We are a few years on and advice changes when new research is done. Know better do better. I would definetely be having a word OP

lotusbell · 02/03/2019 13:33

Why don't you just put a not in his diary for next time, saying you'd prefer he didn't drink tea? No need to make a huge issue of it.

Samind · 02/03/2019 13:37

I just don't think it's a big deal and I think some posters are very ott. Yes I agree in informed decision making but I don't think the nursery purposely would caffinate children for a nasty purpose. If you're not happy OP then talk to them about it. Other posters though we gave all had different childhood experiences and it doesn't mean our parents were any better or more inforn d than others. Everyone does things differently. maybe there should have been an awareness upon moving up to the next class that tea would be offered but i don't think it's deliberate. It's not as if someone's allergic to something and they're giving the class the allergy laden product. I'm feeling kinda twitchy on this thread. Time for tea me thinks.

PinaColada1 · 02/03/2019 13:37

@pompey well said

onefootinthegrave · 02/03/2019 13:39

I hope it was served in a giant Sports Direct mug, with a bacon roll on the side

I spat my tea out at that one Grin

PinaColada1 · 02/03/2019 13:40

@samind because I think it shows a sloppy attitude of the nursery, because they didn’t ask, because it doesn’t mean the nursery were being purposely nasty, but that we put a huge amount of trust in them and wouldn’t want this well it’s okay about potentially grey areas across other things too. And because the child is 2 and not 6.

Iwishididnthaveabigbum · 02/03/2019 13:44

@lottielady Grin

Nothingunpleasant · 02/03/2019 13:44

It is sloppy. Look how many people on this thread have said they wouldn’t like it, yet the nursery never thought to ask.

schnubbins · 02/03/2019 13:45

My kids have been dinking tea since the day they were born, here in Germany they get fennel tea as newborns, fruit tea and other herbal teas at kindergarten and at home as toddlers. I used to give them milky irish tea every now and again from a very young age.When we go to Ireland tea and biscuits were the big treat in the afternoons with granny and grandad.they are 18 and 20 now and healthy .So glad there was none of this angst about everything and anything when they were young.

Thehop · 02/03/2019 13:46

I’m sorry I’m unsure how to reply directly but the 2 most recent cases I can think of are jake fogarty and Oakley Hallam baker that we’re in the press. There’s one a little older that was even more serious but I’ll have to find it when I go into work.

Yes, it is serious, happygogolucky.....have a google at impact of tannin on young children.

Samind · 02/03/2019 13:47

Sloppy attitude running after so many babies and toddlers a day with different needs and capabilities? They are professionals and they have training and have agreed to look after your child. You have agreed to trust these professionals too. Sometimes they make decisions at their own discretion. Better communication may be needed yes but citing NHS guidelines and policies is a bit much.

lunicorn · 02/03/2019 13:48

It's ok at home but s bit weird to be given it at nursery.
That said, my 13 yr old daughter hadn't yet tried tea, and if I don't get her onto it soon, she'll be missing out on one of the great cheap pleasures in life.

ShowMeTheKittens · 02/03/2019 13:52

I had lovely tea when I was a child. It was lukewarm from milk and some sugar. It was disgusting I guess, and so I seldom had it. And yes, shock horror! Camp coffee!

joyfullittlehippo · 02/03/2019 13:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Itssosunnyout · 02/03/2019 13:56

Yanbu

They shouldn't be giving out caffeine at all. It doesn't really fit into the healthy eating /drinking strategy for children.

squeezysparklyballs · 02/03/2019 13:57

NHS advice is milk or water and nothing else.

Not juice, squash, pop or any other sugary processed shite. Non of which attracts the anger that tea does on MN. Odd.

Smoggle · 02/03/2019 13:59

It's fine to give tea (or juice, squash) to your own child at home, but you should be able to expect "healthy eating" from a nursery.

I sometimes chuck wotsits and a froot shoot at my kids at the weekend but wouldn't give it as a snack to childminded children.

GreenWingers · 02/03/2019 13:59

Nice to see the "it didn't do me any harm" brigade out in full force. What may have been seen as ok in the 70s isn't necessarily so now.
What else would you like people to base it on, though? If people have been given tea as a young child and give their own children tea and have many acquaintances who drank it young and none of them have developed iron deficiencies/ homicidal tendencies as a result of it...
Then you can't really ask people to argue "Yes, it's against current ideals and definitely shouldn't be done DESPITE it not having harmed anyone I know."
Today's children are made of the same stuff as seventies children. What worked then will likely work now.

Loftyswops988 · 02/03/2019 14:00

To the PP who mentioned Irn Bru, we used to get given cups of irn bru at nursery when I was younger -- can imagine the outcry if Mumsnet was around in the 90s Grin

Switsy · 02/03/2019 14:04

NHS advice is milk or water and nothing else.

Not juice, squash, pop or any other sugary processed shite. Non of which attracts the anger that tea does on MN. Odd.

People pick and choose which NHS advice they want to strictly adhere to.

Don't let your child drink caffeine - must obey this one
Co-sleep is dangerous - meh, mother knows best

squeezysparklyballs · 02/03/2019 14:16

The NHS states that the risks of SIDS is higher particularly if you smoke, drink etc. Not that you should never cosleep. Some HV will encourage it for BF women.

They never recommend squash though.