To do this with DS and expect no contradiction?

[MidwifeyForLifey]

SIL's DD is having a princess party. When I asked what the boys were coming as, she said superhero's.

DS (a toddler), would look very cute in a prince outfit so I've gone along and purchased an ivory coloured Christening type outfit, complete with little tights and ballet shoes And of course, a little crown. I bought it at the time I was told about the party and nothing was really said apart form an eye roll.

She really doesn't approve and has gone ahead any purchased him a little superhero outfit, despite knowing I've already bought the prince outfit.

AIBU to think this really isn't fair?

She also 'doesn't agree' with boys doing ballet dancing etc, but that's another story for another day.

Soft DS is always dressed in those sort of colours. I like classic and neutral.

My washing machine has never not got a stain out. I've never had an issue. If I did, I'm sure I would consider darker clothes

If he was 5 and asking to wear a princess dress then that would be fine. As he’s only 18 months old I am guessing this is your choice and not his? It seems a bit odd like your looking to attract attention or your looking for an argument. Just dress him in a super hero outfit and have done with it, stop making a big drama out of it.

Prince Valiant was a super hero.

Just dress him in a super hero outfit and have done with it, stop making a big drama out of it.

I don't have a superhero one. I do have a prince one that I've bought. I've honestly had a lot of sad news this last month, I really don't think I should be argued with over this.

OP you're going to put him in it anyway so I'd hide the thread and put up with people looking at you funny at the party

Fancy dress at 18 months, not for me thanks

How dare people have princess and super hero parties, all parties should be non binary 🤣

I really don't think I should be argued with over this. Well pointless posting then.

You are using your son to prove a point, stir up a fight with your SIL and disrupt the theme of you nieces birthday party. It would be entirely different if you DS wanted to wear a particular outfit but he’s too young to care or even know what he’s wearing. It’s not about what YOU want and what you think he looks cute in, it’s about your neice as it’s her birthday FFS. There’s really no need to be so confrontational about what a baby wears to a toddler party. For what it’s worth I think the theme is stupid and it’s sad that such gender stereotypes are still alive and kicking but all you’re going to do is fall out with your SIL if you continue like this. Take a deep breath and pick your battles.

DS went to a pirates and princesses party when he was 3 or 4. He went in a fairy costume (tutu, wings, wand - over his habitual joggers and t-shirt...) - I don't remember if there were other boys dressed as fairies or girls as pirates, and I got nothing more than 'aww he looks lovely' from the other parents.

I think that going all out with an ivory prince costume is why you're getting the hard time. A toddler going in a costume they already have, and that they want to wear is one thing. A toddler being dressed up to make a point is another.

I've honestly had a lot of sad news this last month, I really don't think I should be argued with over this
. Dress him in normal clothes and be done with it.

It does depend on the relationship to a certain extent.

99% of the people I know if they'd said that, I would think "Aw! He'll look cute".
The remaining 1% of people I'd think that they're always trying to make them/their ds the centre of attention and can't bear someone else to be, and read it as another attempt to make the event about themselves.

Also your argument that you don't have a superhero outfit is redundant as you've already said you went out and bought this one.

Girls princess outfits will either be the cheap polyester ones, or a normal party dress, so he will stick out, as I expect you knew, which makes me suspect you are one of the 1%.

'You do not want to be argued with', basically you want people to agree with you.

I don't have a superhero one.

SIL has bought one you can use. Tbh, I'd definitely think you were attempting to steal the limelight at your niece's party by taking him in that outfit.

I think you are in the right, boys can be princes etc etc. But, you are also being unreasonable as it is her child's birthday so you may well create some drama here.

Good lord. What a fuss. He's 18 months old. I can't help thinking that if people weren't obsessed with displaying their perfectly curated events and outfits on social media , they wouldn't get in such a tizzy about this sort of thing.

I've honestly had a lot of sad news this last month, I really don't think I should be argued with over this
This I think says a lot about you.
Stamping your feet like a spoilt brat because your son won't be centre of attention then justifying it by bringing up your sad news!
I'm glad you're not my SIL

AngelaHodgeson I 100% agree. I think sil thinks you are trying to steal the limelight and from your attitude it does seem that way.
Your dn is having a princess and superhero party and sil has bought you an outfit for you son.
I think the nice thing to to would be wear the costume sil provided and allow your dn to be center of attention for the day.

Jesus, you sound like a precious princess. You'll fit right in at this party lol.

YABVU. You bought the outfit after being told it wasn't suitable. How daft is that?

Stop behaving like spoilt child and conform to the party theme.

Why don't you want him to wear the superhero outfit your SIL has bought him, OP? Can you return the christening outfit? That saves you money, fits the theme and unless you're trying to make a point it seems like the easiest option for everyone to be happy. I suspect your motivation is to put SIL in her place because you don't think she's made the right theme choice.

YABVVU
In your op you said that you asked sil what the boys were coming as, and she said Superheroes! Why ask if you had already bought his outfit and had no intention of sticking with party theme?

You think your ds should be a Prince so have bought christening gown, tights and ballet shoes instead! If that’s what you want go ahead, however don't be surprised if the other parents think you are trying to make your child the “centre of attention” which makes you sound very precious (my son is sooo special, look at the little prince he is). Not surprised your sil has bought him an alternative costume, which sounds much more suitable.

Personally I can’t think of anything worse than the outfit you have described and I’m pretty sure your ds will be suitably mortified with the photos when he is older.

My son would disown me if I had ever dressed him up like that!

Erm, the other girls will be wearing crowns too?

Given you have, by your own admission, you bought your own crown, how do you know that the other girls will be wearing one?

Princess party just generally means party dress. Yes a bit of hair sparkle maybe. But not a crown. With a christening outfit.

You just sound like you want him to stand out and be the centre of attention.