To ask; If you were poor in your 30's, did things improve?

[moneyworries9]

I'm feeling a little down tonight. Trying to clear debts and it's just an uphill struggle, I worry that this will be mine & my families future.

I'm 30 years old and curious to know if those of you who struggled to make ends meet at this stage managed to turn things around?

Backstory: I'm a SAHM to 2 small DC and DH works (a lot). We are not on the property ladder and have over £4,000 of debt.

I was a single parent in my 30s, had been left a doer upper of a house in negative equity and had no income at all. I had to get a job that, once childcare was paid, cost me to work. This got me into debt which meant although my earnings increased substantially, the second half of my 30s was spent mired in debt. It was horrendous.

What made a huge difference was when I finally paid off all the debt (Thanks MSE!) and I vowed never to be in debt again. Everything I earned was mine, not going on debt repayments. Better than a payrise!

OP, you have a lot of debt and you seem quite entrenched that you won't change your current lifestyle to increase family earnings. That won't *turn things around". You either have to continue as you are or look at paid employment.

OP, you have a lot of debt and you seem quite entrenched that you won't change your current lifestyle to increase family earnings. That won't turn things around". You either have to continue as you are or look at paid employment.

I am looking at paid employment. I've been speaking lots with the nursery and there is a high chance I'll be hired by the nursery that I have organised to volunteer in. We have no family support where we live and so earning more but forking our for loads of wraparound/holiday childcare for the kids would be counter productive right now. And as I said, I have a long term plan to train FYI become an accountant. We live very frugally and are currently making a dent in the debt but it's just tough.

Childcare qualification sounds like a bad idea. Low paid and low valued industry.

Why not aim for something better paid?

Things got better for us. And we found teenagers weren’t that much more expensive. Ours were so used to not expecting much when they were growing up that they don’t expect anything now! They are happy and grateful for what they have. My dh and I believe it’s more important to spend time with your children as a relaxed mum/ dad(if you can), than to work yourself ragged to ‘give them a better quality of life’. I didn’t study and get a better paid job til they stared at uni!

I'm going to be starting a childcare qualification in summer and volunteering in a setting once DD is in nursery.

Whilst the Intension ist good, I don't think starting qualification and doing volunteering is the right move if you struggle financially. I would get out there and work.

apart from that, qualifications in childcare won't earn you good money either so definitely not an 'investment'

Whilst the Intension ist good, I don't think starting qualification and doing volunteering is the right move if you struggle financially. I would get out there and work.

Once you are there as a volunteer, there is a huge chance of you being hired. There's a huge demand her for childcare. It's a growing town and numerous nurseries have recently opened/are being built just now. My friend volunteered for a month and then was offered a job which is pretty much the norm at the moment.

It wouldn't be an investment, you're right. It would be a source of additional income for the next few years before I start training in accountancy when my DC are a little older and childcare becomes less of an issue.

I'm 30, DH is 33 - I wish our debt was only 4K

But, we both have 35k+ jobs and it's manageable - the kicker is going to be in 3 months when we have to pay for nursery for 4 days a week but me not working would be worse financially and I'd never get back to the level I'm at.

It's only a couple of years until 30 free hours kicks in and then school starts so I know things will be better by the time I'm 35.

There's term time work that you don't need a child care qualification for. I went into child care(pushed into it by Narc mother) and the low pay has caused me no end of issues. I'm branching out now and with a young family and debt it's tough. I wouldn't think about retraining more than once though. Qualifications aren't cheap and it'll take a long time to pay off any child care qualifications on those wages.

My husband works a 9-5 so my situation is very different and I appreciate it's way easier for me to find work to fit around my husband to avoid child care costs. I've just started weekend and evening work at a leisure center, doing kids parties. It'll be tough running the home in the day and working every weekend, but it's the first step. Won' t pay off our debts quicker, but will prevent them getting bigger. Once all the kids are in education I can work on digging us out. While the kids are young you can only make small steps I think, but those small steps do add up to a lot by the time the kids are that bit older. FX at least.

I can really empathise with you. Sometimes it feels like, as hard as you work, you'll never feel financially 'free'.

Spent my 20s with very little, although managed to get on housing ladder by 30.

Relationship breakdown in 30s meant house had to be sold as I couldn't afford house and childcare (although I am grateful for the tax credits I received).

So mid 30s was back to square one! No house, although professional job.

Married and back on housing ladder at 36. Deposit from previous house, but also help from DF.

Worked way up to decent (although not crazy) income. Now getting into debt again taking ex through courts as have a fab job offer abroad and need permission to remove the kids abroad.

At almost 40 I'd hoped to be a bit more sorted than I am, however kids are doing well and my DH is wonderful and not a tosser like the last one!

There are ups and downs in life. Just keep at it and don't give up!

OllyBJolly how did MSE help? I've just started to wade in to it and need help!

OP we are in our thirties. My life on paper looks like I have money but I've been doing sums and we are waaaaaay overspending. I thought we had been frittering money away on shit like takeaways which we have been doing but really the worst is things like car payments. Between us we earn between about 60-70k but are in debt on credit cards and constantly in our overdraft. We climbed the property ladder a bit quicker than we probably should have an have overstretched

Absolutely. I've been on low salaries for most of my 20s and 30s. The secret is to make it a priority to invest in your skills. Professional courses are so expensive but I did a few over the last year and was able to jump a whole salary bracket! So I worked in a popular job that pays very badly and managed to shift that to a similar job with more technical requirements that pays a lot better. It's also worth getting a mentor. There are so many new digital roles now it's good to get advice on what skills people are looking for.

In same boat and through step change debt charity i've set up a DRO so mu debts will be wiped after a year, as long as you have less than £50 per month left after household expenses there's no drawback (apart from bad credit rating). might help you?

We were in horrendous debt when I was 30 as our business had been done over for thousands. Although it was Ltd. we also dealt with lots of family run businesses, so decided to sell our house and pay off as much as we could. We were on the bones of our arses with 3 children and not a job between us. We honestly didn't have a penny.

I worked a minimum wage job part time but did an open university course. 10 years on I am a senior manager and still can't believe how far we've come.

You are right to get qualified in a professional sector and if you can do this as well as fire fight for a few more years, you'll do your family proud.

Good luck op.

I wouldn't think about retraining more than once though. Qualifications aren't cheap and it'll take a long time to pay off any child care qualifications on those wages.

This is something for me to consider, but the childcare qualification doesn't need to start being repaid until I earn a certain amount (25,000 off the top of my head) and if I train in accountancy down the line, that really will be an investment. I have no university debt so don't mind having some debt which is from studying as I know these are very worthwhile debts.

Could you look at studying bookkeeping as well as doing the childcare? There is a big demand from small businesses and individuals for good book keepers and if you are numerate you should find it reasonably easy. That can be done very flexibly from home and would side step you into accounting.

In answer to your question, yes, our finances improved dramatically through our thirties due to DH becoming much more senior at work. If you want to earn decent money there’s no real alternative to looking at well paid industries and finding a way in.

Also having some measurable and achievable goals to keep you motivated.
Good luck.

Could you look at studying bookkeeping as well as doing the childcare?

This is exactly the sort of thing I'm going to be looking into. The childcare thing is merely a stop gap solution to give us a bit of extra cash and also to fit well round having small kids. The shorter hours will also be helpful for allowing me more time to study when I start training in accountancy.

I also have a chronic health condition which flares up when I am stressed or when I take on too much so that's another reason I think the nursery job would be a good idea for whilst the kids are small and with my husband being away so much.

OllyBJolly how did MSE help? I've just started to wade in to it and need help!

The Debt Free Wannabe board is ultra-supportive with lots of ideas on reducing outgoings and maximising income. Great advice on which debts to prioritise.

Thanks. Writing down absolutely everything we are spending this month. DH has already got a telling off for a Starbucks

Changed my gas/electric provider. Changing broadband today and getting cash back. Cancelled a few subscriptions and when we had to buy something today I made DH go online and click and collect it so we could get cash back.

Of course you can turn it around.

When I met my DH he was an apprentice on 13k a year I was on 16k a year. I was on the property market but we were struggling so we got in 2 lodgers. They helped us for a year or so then we fell pregnant unexpectedly!

One lodger moved out. My DH became redundant and I was panicking! Luckily DH passed apprenticeship and got a job. Classed as self employed though he needed a van we needed a family car. 20k on finance right there! We had to do up our home to sell and buy a more suitable home. 10k finance there. So 30k debt!

We moved house whilst on maternity and we saved every penny we had. We would scrimp through the months as we had to keep a just in case fund if anything went wrong with the house.

Now my husband earns 31k a year, our daughter is 1 years old. I have taken on 2 jobs. 1 office job 3 days a week and then weekends and evenings I work around my DH hours so we don't need to pay for child care. Having 2 jobs I work 54 hours a week and earn about 32k a year. We are moving again and paying our debts off from our equity and moving to our forever home. Only enabled by me taking a second job to have a higher income! And of course my DH qualifying and working hard.

Once were debt free we should be able to save £2000-2500 a month. Never in a million years did I think we could save that sort of money but we are due to a few changes and working hard.

We are only 22 and 24 so we've achieved a lot in a short amount of time really, but we have come to realise we need to do something to change things and sometimes you aren't in a position to do things right away. I went back to work when my DD was 8 months old. I didn't want to really but had to, to get us the home and life she deserves. We also got married somewhere in between the craziness!

My point is, you work hard and you can achieve things you want to. It may mean seeing your partner less to save on childcare like we do but it suits us fine now were used to it, the time We do spend together is valuable!

We also have stopped all luxuries except one date night a months and meal plan from Aldi. We used to waste so much money on food for work that we would buy or takeaways!

I’m going to be very honest. Please don’t work in Early Childhood Education as a stop gap. The industry is full of such people - lacking true passion for the career and not intending to pur their all into it. As an EY Professional,I’m fed up of it. Children deserve better. Do book keeping instead.

We were stony broke in our 30s. I was (mainly) a SAHM and DH had to take two paycuts in rapid succession followed by redundancy. Our mortgage rate was around 15%. The kids had second hand clothes, I haunted the reduced aisles of the supermarket and also worked night shifts there when times were particularly tight.

That was about 25 years ago. Relatively speaking we are loaded now, we own three properties and are debt free. We have paid DC and me through uni. We have enough disposable income for me to not have to do paid work but we still have a great lifestyle. We travel a lot, get the best seats at any show we want to see and I no longer have to count the pennies when I grocery shop. So rest assured OP it can get better.

But those days of lentils, baked beans , toy libraries and clipping coupons were far and away the happiest days of my life. They were hard work at the time and I was often stressed and anxious about making ends meet but to be the main carer to my children was a massive privilege and one I will always be grateful for.

Following, 38, 3k on credit cards, just saved 2k from new part time job towards house needing work and car is 10 years old, but just had to pay an unexpected tax bill for DH. I now have £30.77 in savings.

I have a child with special needs so my work options are limited.