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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I’m worried about Dee

39 replies

LellowYedbetter · 17/02/2019 14:20

If Conor and Dee Devlin split up, would she even be entitled to anything?? She’s so vulnerable. I know he’d have to pay for the kids and I don’t know them so it’s more about other people in same scanario. Millionaire partner but not married ...

OP posts:

YogaWannabe · 17/02/2019 14:22

He’s a revolting piece of shit and a rapist

Original poster

LellowYedbetter · 17/02/2019 14:22

I’m sorry this makes no sense! My AIBU is to think non married couples should have the same rights in a split as a married couple? Or is this unfair to the richer party?

OP posts:

RJnomore1 · 17/02/2019 14:23

Bit random!

I suspect she would be fine.

Marmite27 · 17/02/2019 14:24

If non married couples want the same rights as married couples then they should get married.

caughtinanet · 17/02/2019 14:24

I had to google to know who you're talking about, have a completely missed something, is she someone famous in her own right to be known only be her first name?

Anyway, not the point of your question, I suppose only the couple involved and their advisors would know what financial arrangements they have

Alison100199 · 17/02/2019 14:24

I have no idea who these people are but no, just because you've been in a relationship with someone that does not entitle you to get half their stuff. Unfair to the richer party.

NotANotMan · 17/02/2019 14:26

Marriage is a legal status and contract and should not be conferred by accident IMO

I don't understand why women who take financial and career hits to have children in relationships don't get married first. Too often they seem to be waiting for the romantic proposal 🙄

CanILeavenowplease · 17/02/2019 14:57

My AIBU is to think non married couples should have the same rights in a split as a married couple

No. Get married if you want the rights involved with marriage. If your partner doesn’t want to marry then you accept you won’t have those rights and plan accordingly or you rethink the relationship.

Fabaunt · 17/02/2019 15:00

No she’s a mug. Unmarried people should have no rights to anything their partner has.

IncrediblySadToo · 17/02/2019 15:03

No idea who you’re on about, but NO, people are free to get married or not. It’s not for you, the Govt or anyone else to decide what their obligations are to each other.

I’m sure you mean well, but seriously, your suggestion removes peoples freedom to define their own relationships.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 17/02/2019 15:11

My AIBU is to think non married couples should have the same rights in a split as a married couple? Or is this unfair to the richer party?

No. And not because it's unfair to the richer party, but because being in a relationship with someone is not entering into a legal contract with them, and getting married is.

If you want that protection, those rights, you have to marry. If you're with someone and you want those rights and they don't want to give them to you, that says all you need to know about how much you can really rely on that person.

Blackbear10 · 17/02/2019 15:15

I don’t understand why, if you want the security marriage brings, you wouldn’t get married?
It doesn’t seem like a massive leap?!

badlydrawnperson · 17/02/2019 15:22

My AIBU is to think non married couples should have the same rights in a split as a married couple

YABVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVU

Get married if you want - don't if you don't.

SileneOliveira · 17/02/2019 15:34

I had to google to see who these people are.

Apparently he's a "mixed martial artist" and she's a "businessperson". They have a child together and are not married. They are also Irish.

Agree with what everyone else says - if you want the protection of marriage, get married. Doesn't have to be a big expensive do. According to google again, the cost of a standard wedding in Dublin is around 200 euros.

But this pair have obviously decided not to marry, So she's entitled to nothing, assuming he's the one with the dosh.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 17/02/2019 15:35

She should pretend to forgive him, marry him, then dump his sorry arse and rake him out for a she can get. Despicable man.

LilaJude · 17/02/2019 15:37

My AIBU is to think non married couples should have the same rights in a split as a married couple?

No. People are free to make the decision to get married if they want to. It’s not something that should be forced upon someone without their explicit consent.

mytieisascarf · 17/02/2019 15:38

The problem with your suggestion is that there are various levels of "not married". There is "not married" and have children together and live together (in which case you may have a point) and there is "not married" but in a relationship with one another, in which case why should one lose their earnings/pension/home to the other? What if the different parties have different perceptions of what their relationship is? That is why you need a contract - a marriage contract or a civil partnership contract.

Leela96 · 17/02/2019 15:44

In Ireland subject to certain requirements a cohabitant has certain rights when a relationship breaks up.

Living together for 5 years - no kids

2 years if you have kids.

A non-married person may be entitled to maintenance, property & part of the other persons pension pot.

You need to apply to the courts.

This law was introduced in 2011.

Leela96 · 17/02/2019 15:48

But this pair have obviously decided not to marry, So she's entitled to nothing, assuming he's the one with the dosh.

Given they reside in Ireland she would be entitled to a fair share.

Mrsmadevans · 17/02/2019 16:03

I am sure she will be fine

Que0 · 17/02/2019 16:05

Did we find out who Dee is or what’s going on with Dee?

RJnomore1 · 17/02/2019 16:08

Given she handles his business affairs I'm confident she will have nothing to worry about regarding money.

I think she's got plenty of things to worry about more in that relationship.

Yulebealrite · 17/02/2019 16:13

Dee, Dee WTF is Dee?

bluetheskyis · 17/02/2019 16:33

People who have children together and want the same rights as married couples should just take themselves off to the registry office and get wed!

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 17/02/2019 16:34

I had to Google her as I didn't have a clue who she was.
She doesnt seem very vulnerable to me
. The way you're going on you'd think she was living in a bed sit with 2 kids and no money for vitals eg food gas and electricity. I'm non plussed as to why she's vulnerable. Not to sound goady but have I missed something.

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