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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How old is too old for a bedtime story?

171 replies

Yabbers · 15/02/2019 21:05

We had a discussion at work about bedtime stories. My colleagues who have children the same age as mine say they stopped bedtime stories a few years ago. DD is 9 and loves me reading to her before bed (and I love it too) Occasionally if bedtime is late we don’t do one, but she really hates not getting one.

My colleagues say she is too old, but in my view if it’s something we both enjoy I’ll do it as long as she asks.

How old were yours when you stopped, is anyone still reading to older children at bedtime?

OP posts:
RedSkyLastNight · 15/02/2019 21:52

Still reading with DS and DD who are 15 and 13. When we are reading we often end up dis using themes in the books or things that remind them of events in their own lives. It's probably the time they talk most to me!

We don't think of it as reading a bedtime story but more spending quality time together.

babysharkah · 15/02/2019 21:53

No age is too old as long as they want it. I'm 40 and my mum still reads aloud to all of us when the weather is crap camping.

PaintBySticker · 15/02/2019 21:54

“What a load of miseries! I don't think there's any such thing as 'too old'. I guess it peters out when everyone's ready.“

This. My 8 year old went off bedtime stories but I’ve lured him back in with Harry Potter and he listens intently and wants more. On the other hand I have found them very long winded and in need of editing (seems to be hundreds of pages before the school year even starts), but he’s enjoying it and that’s what matters.

MissClareRemembers · 15/02/2019 21:54

Mine are 12 (nearly 13) and 9. I read to them when they are eating their tea and then again at bedtime. Always chapter books and we like to discuss what might happen/plot twists etc. It’s lovely and a brilliant way to increase vocabulary.

Having said that, DS 1 would probably be embarrassed if his friends knew I still read to him. Sad isn’t it?

Pieceofpurplesky · 15/02/2019 21:54

DS was about 11 however sometimes even now at 14 we will read together lying on the bed. It is lovely and relaxing and doesn't happen often - make the most of it

RuthW · 15/02/2019 21:56

Dd had bedtime stories until she started secondary. Very often we read a page each though.

MilletSentToForceIt · 15/02/2019 21:56

When I was 17 I went out with a group of friends for New Year and we all stayed over at the house of one of them.
One of the lads remembered that I had said I loved being read to, and he read me a bedtime story.
Dear reader, I married him.

WickedWytch · 15/02/2019 21:57

When they don't want you to.
DS refused bedtime stories when he was eight, and far too big for them. He’s 10 now and very happy for me to come in and read a couple of chapters of whatever he’s reading. It’s a great way to connect and chat as he fills me in on what’s been happening.

Dd is a struggling reader and feeling the growing gap between what she can manage and what her friends are reading so it’s a great way to bridge the gap and keep her in the loop. She’s starting to tackle a few pages by herself here and there because she’s just “reading on a little” not trying to read the whole book.

I think the time to stop will be when they take over and start reading to me.

Bearberry · 15/02/2019 21:57

Never too old. I still get my husband to tell me a story (rather then read one, he usually tells me the plot of a film!) when I can’t sleep. I have audible play through Alexa in the bedroom whilst I put the washing away too, I’d love to fall asleep to it but then I wouldn’t be able to pause my story or find my spot for next time Sad

modzy78 · 15/02/2019 21:57

When I got into Harry Potter (age 21 when student teaching), I started reading them to my younger brother. He was 13 and an avid reader. I had to read every one to him when they were released (and that would have been from book 3 or 4). It was our thing, even though he was fully capable of reading them independently. It's a memory I treasure, and I'm loving sharing books with my daughter.

LilQueenie · 15/02/2019 21:59

never. I still listen to audiobooks as many do.

Chewbecca · 15/02/2019 22:04

Our bedtime stories evolved into a bedtime chat, after which DS continued to read by himself. Now he is 15 and sadly that has stopped too, he doesn’t want to anymore. He chats in the car and at the dinner table now. I would’ve carried on.

californiastars · 15/02/2019 22:05

I remember reading this article years ago, and always thought how lovely it was.
www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2011/sep/10/alice-ozma-dad-read-every-night

Okki · 15/02/2019 22:05

I'm 44 and love my DC's reading bedtime stories to me Grin

I stopped reading to them regularly a couple of years ago as I tried reading chapter books - last one this Christmas. They prefer reading to themselves as it's quicker. However, I had the brainwave today of still reading them books like The Gruffalo as they still like the experience. So I shall try short books and poems now. They're YR 7 and YR 4.

BiscuitMachine · 15/02/2019 22:06

As long as they want to listen, I will read! My girls are 11 and 8 and I still read to them every night. We are on the Lord of the Rings at the moment. It’s my favourite time of day. They do like reading, but it’s not like when I was young - there are so many other things to do to occupy yourself, and they often choose something else. But that time we have reading is precious, we all love it.

Asta19 · 15/02/2019 22:07

For some reason this thread reminded me of when I dated a science teacher and when I had trouble dropping off he would recite the periodic table to me! It always worked! I’m 50 and I would like a bedtime story if I had anyone to tell them to me! Ignore your grouchy colleagues!

cheminotte · 15/02/2019 22:12

Still reading most nights to 11 year old here.
He prefers non fiction but has recently read one of the HPs himself (previously has been read jointly).

NChangeForNoReason · 15/02/2019 22:14

NEVER!!! Promote reading together for as long as you can - it's a life skill that will never leave and bring joy for years to come!!

caringcarer · 15/02/2019 22:15

We read story until 9 or 10 but then still listened to him reading until 13. Basically he was reading his own bedtime story by then and we just listened or discussed story line occasionally. If both you and your dd enjoy story time keep doing it.

NWQM · 15/02/2019 22:18

We still even watch CBBC bedtime stories and my children are 7 and 9....obviously its when a certain someone is reading but.... :-)

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 15/02/2019 22:19

There is no such thing as too old for a bedtime story. I love to get into bed and listen to an audiobook or podcast as I fall asleep.

What do your colleagues think will happen from being read a bedtime story at "too old" an age?!

arethereanyleftatall · 15/02/2019 22:20

@BertrandRussell
Why is it sad to want them to read to themselves sometimes as well as sometimes have a story? Sorry, I don't get that.

CloserIAm2Fine · 15/02/2019 22:21

Keep reading until the DC stop wanting it!

I still remember feeling sad when my dad stopped reading me bedtime stories but continued reading to my younger sister

Gottalovesummer · 15/02/2019 22:21

Some lovely stories here, modzy millet

Still reading to ours who are well into their teens. It's a great way to connect with plugged in teenagers.

CakeNinja · 15/02/2019 22:24

Reading is one of my favourite things to do!
My girls were around 10 when they stopped being read to at bedtime by me or dp, it just naturally filtered off with them taking themselves off to read their own bedtime stories.
We also have a younger child who is read to every night.
This evening I was reading him a story and both girls came in and squished into our bed for a couple of chapters. It was lovely, it does usually happen at the weekends but I really enjoy it. They don’t always join us but they are 14 and 15 and still really love books!!
Keep going as long as they want. You can never ever be read to too much.

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