To nearly vomit at this info

[namechangerfortheeees]

I've just seen that a man I used to work with has been arrested after a snare set by paedophile hunters!

He made my life hell when I worked there and was the sole reason I left! When I first started working there he was overtly flirty and I used to laugh it off and get on ok with him. Then I got tiered if the creepy comments and "jokes" so didn't engage and then he hated me! Would always try get me into trouble and as soon as I sent an internal email he would print it off and keep them all in a locked drawer.

I just knew he was bad news! Aibu to which he got longer than 12m and to hope his time inside is HELL! (I know I'm not).

Ps I name changed so people couldn't work out who I was from previous posts

Wish he got longer **

12 months for that is a joke. I think 20 years without parole is a bit better.

I always think that it must be absolutely awful for people who know paedophiles in real life; the whole thing must be sickening, the fact that they're someone's friend, someone's family.

YANBU to be repulsed by the news. I suspect his time inside will be hell on earth, though.

I felt so sick, I just saw it on fb randomly on the local news site. Worst thing is he has a daughter my age with a little boy. Her life must be upside down.

I worked in s local supermarket with a bloke who was arrested and convicted a few years ago for having indecent images - twice. He actually lived next to two local primary schools and when I worked with him we could never decide if he was gay or straight or if he was on drugs, he was always twitchy, would hop from foot to foot if you were having a chat with him. I've since seen him in town and he was stood watching kids. Just vile

12 months for that is a joke. I think 20 years without parole is a bit better.

I agree 100% with maximum possible sentencing for anybody who abuses children (sexually or otherwise).

Whilst I admire their motivation, there are problems with these 'paedophile hunters' when it comes to convictions.

These are basically adults pretending to be underage girls/boys and allowing themselves to be groomed online. As such, legally they are not minors and, as such, TECHNICALLY no offence has taken place.

Even if someone arranges to meet someone they think is 13 year old girl (or whatever), they haven't actually arranged to meet a 13 year old girl so they can't be prosecuted as such.

It's still worthwhile though as, with some digging, the police can normally find some associated behaviours to secure a conviction.

@PBo83 I do actually agree with that. But apparently he was actively seeking young girls out online and they said I'm 14 I hope that doesn't bother you. His reply was I'm 53, I hope that doesn't bother you. He also lived opposite a primary school 🤢

PBo83 - as I understand it, they can be charged with attempting the crime, even if it was a set-up. I think what then happens is the police seize their phone/computer and discover loads of kids they have actually been in touch with. I doubt if the hunters are often the first "prey" they have gone after....

When the News of the World did a massive front page expose of photographs of paedophiles I was shocked to see a teacher from the school I attended pictured and named. He was a paedophile and after the NoW report many more victims came forward.

I've had similar, OP. A guy I used to work with at my first job I hated, we all thought he was weirdo (everyone made jokes he probably liked kids). I was a teenager, youngest on the team, and he was really condescending towards me even though I'd worked there much longer than him, he would get down on the floor to talk to me at face height whilst I was sitting to tell me how to do simple things like print a bloody email.

He didn't turn up to work one day and we never saw him again, director then told us he had been arrested and was apparently prolific, he had hopped around the country changing his name to evade the police (not envy). He was so obviously creepy and had that 'vibe', we were not surprised but still shocked when the truth came out. I felt dirty for so long after knowing I had had conversations with this man, ate in the same room, the 'jokes' we had all made now knowing they were all true...

I saw him a couple of years ago locally at a pub with a wacky attached (I was with DS) and called 101, they wouldn't do anything about it as I didn't have his real name

PBo83 - as I understand it, they can be charged with attempting the crime, even if it was a set-up. I think what then happens is the police seize their phone/computer and discover loads of kids they have actually been in touch with. I doubt if the hunters are often the first "prey" they have gone after....

Absolutely and that's why I still think they're doing a good job.

Like I said, even if the original 'offence' isn't legally binding, a bit of digging usually uncovers plenty of evidence to secure a conviction...which is good.

Terrible storys. Yanbu

Pumpa
Idk what a wacky is. An underaged boy/ girl?

My husband used to work at a boy's school where there was a pastoral care counsellor. My DH and other teachers would often refer troubled boys to see this man . Some years later a young man committed suicide and left a note saying that this man had sexually molested him over years while he was a pupil at the school.

The police notified this man that he was to be investigated as a pedophile - he immediately went to a train station and threw himself under a train. Subsequently, dozens of young men came forward with their own stories of this man's pedophilia.

My husband and his colleagues were aghast to think that this man, who'd been a popular fellow in the staff room, had been grooming and molesting the young men in their care. My husband still has nightmares about it.

@Mummyoflittledragon Wacky Warehouse! The softplay areas attached to some pubs

fudgebrownie I can assure you it is extremely difficult for the families of paedophiles. Someone you once thought you knew who then isn't who you think they are. It's hard reading these threads when it's you that's going through this. Sadly anyone could be a paedophile and it's important to be as clued up on signs as possible and teach children boundaries as young as possible.

Ohhhh wacky warehouse. Got you now. Sorry have a migraine. Couldn’t work that one out. Obvious now when I read back......

@Mummyoflittledragon some places they're fuzzy eds or other branding, wasn't sure whether it was a regional thing

@pumpastrotter Christ! That's shocking. I once watched a documentary about pedophiles (as you do)!

There was a man who cried because he was so sad that he just couldn't help it. So took some drugs (prescribed) to kill his sex drive and testosterone. It was really interesting but that doesn't change my opinion of the guy I know.

pumpa
No idea. They’re WW in my neck of the woods.

Ugh. My dh worked with someone who was arrested for viewing and holding category A pictures on his computer. He was already unreliable and flaky but one day he just didn’t come into work and didn’t come back. Then they found out he was jail when his solicitor contacted them by bringing in a letter from him in jail to ask for references! Even at that point, no one knew what he was in for, or maybe management knew and didn’t say anything. Then someone saw it in the local newspaper.

Dh was genuinley shocked. He said he never got involved in banter, never did anything that would make people think he was like that. He just ate a lot and was always late/forgetting stuff. It’s scary how people like this can hide in plain sight.

It's amazing how many don't even go to gaol these days.

But they often get time off if the "paedophile" hunters are involved, which can also impede the police investigation.

Namechange
Yes there are many peopdophiles, who do not wish to abuse children despite sexually desiring them. Putting aside societal concerns, it must be very distressing to feel like that and have no control over your feelings.

There is a network of non offending pedophiles and help for them. But they are undetectable by the general public and wouldn’t act in ways to draw attention to themselves. They will have taken steps to stay away from children and keep children safe from them.

Not the same at all as this guy.

@namechangerfortheeees there is only so much sympathy (none) I can have even for those who genuinely cannot understand their own urges and do their best to not act on it. Unfortunately, I do not believe these people can be rehabilitated and there needs to be much harder consequences and treatment - castration, but then there's the argument that wouldn't be too much of a hindrance to those who don't want to change, personally I'd have them put down but at best they shouldn't be allowed back into normal society. Of course it's never as black and white as that though i.e. an 18yr old sleeping with a 15 yr old shouldn't be punished the same way a grown adult abusing a young child/repeated offenders.