To be strict about video games?

[balinesecat]

We allow the kids to play video games but with time limits and stick strictly to the age ratings.

DS is still in primary school but has friends whose parents are buying them 12, 16 and even 18-rated games. He gets to have a go when he's over at theirs. Those kids then expect to play those games when they come over to ours - of course they get a hard no. But I'm a bit put out that some parents seem to be totally laissez faire about this.

AIBU to think these parents are being irresponsible allowing their kids to play mature-rated video games? Or am I just being a prude?

Sorry tgat was in reply to sweeneytoddsrazor re fifa

Agreed @Greeneggs but those sort of games often have the younger age ratings which is why I think people should heck out games for themselves rather than blanket ban because of age restrictions

Never understood some parents logic.

Minecraft where you can kill stuff, blow people up etc great.
However Fortnight is pure evil.

Also wwe is quite a violent game and tbh i find it worse then fortnight. This is because the people in wwe look real, you can see the pajn you're inflicting etc

I think it’s really important in this day and age to be well informed about games, a lot of them get a higher rating because of the online element. Of course a lot of them are just really violent or scary, but there’s plenty of places you can read about or even watch clips to judge if you don’t want to try the gameplay yourself.

And for the quite frankly ridiculous question from RiverTam - I allow my child sugar and McDonald’s on occasion, likewise I allow him to play Xbox or Switch. Lots of things can be addictive, that’s why as a parent I limit exposure and make sure the games played are age-appropriate.

Diana (excellent user name, btw!) - exactly - you're not laissez-faire over it. That's the OP's point! And what's mainly being discussed here is the violence, but there's been loads in the news about the addictive nature of, for example, Fortnite. Clearly some parents don't have a handle on this.

I’d be a bit put out of young children were permitted to play these games without consultation first. It’s not really the done thing to allow this so it’s only polite to ask the parents before letting someone else’s children play.

Game ratings are not the same as movie ratings.

Anything 12 and under is a judgement call as it's ageing criteria can be oddly specific.
Just look into the game and judge for yourself. You can go on loads of website where they detail the parts which make it as higher rating

I also think it depends massively on the personality of the child. If your child is prone to fits of temper, then competitive and high-pressure games like Fortnight are probably not a good idea, something more "constructive" and slow-paced like Minecraft might be a better fit... But if child has an addictive or obsessive personality, it might be better to have a game with clear "levels" or time limits so they don't unknowingly sink hours and hours into the game. If your child can't differentiate between tv/games and real life, don't let them play games which might encourage bad behaviour. The ratings in my opinion are not the only consideration.

Computer games can be an excellent pastime - far better for cognitive and deductive skills than mindlessly watching TV, but like everything in life, moderation is key.

I don't understand fortnites bad rep on here. It's a great game.

RiverTam

But i do think understanding that addictiveness of games is not conveyed in the age rating and anything you do that leaves you with a pleasant glow can be addictive.

This is why understanding the cost reward balance is i think what helps most and for me is a massive factor in determining the suitability of the game.

I should add if other children are about its disney infinity and mario kart. Its fine fir me to make a judgement call for my child, not fine for me to make it for someone elses child.

yes, I read your earlier post and thought it very insightful on that score.

It's both, isn't it?

I don’t know, it’s a hard one and I say this as a gamer...
If you can’t play it yourself research the game individually.
GTA for eg, is a hard no from me for any under 16/17’s (so definitely not school aged!) but battlefield and COD would be ok for a mature 13-14 year old, IMO, despite being rated 15 or 18 (depending on the game.)
Fortnight has a daft rating for what it is, but you can ban for annoyance alone 😂😂
Basically just use a bit of common sense but YANBU anyway because I’ve known kids as young as 7/8 being allowed on GTA V (where there are sex scenes, lots of graphic violence, a torture scene in a mission you have to do to progress etc etc) and that’s disgraceful IMO.

RiverTam how dare you respond to my snippy post with a reasonable one

Apologies I misread your tone.

It is. But then i also have banned board games in this house for the same reasons...

My DH works in the industry so I will be leaving it up to him to screen. However I do think it's down to each individual game. Uncharted is a great Indiana-Jones style series but I think is 16 plus due to some shooting and the occasional swearword. If DS grows up to be sensible I'll happily shave a few years off the recommended age.

I don't know why it always takes exactly one post before GTA is mentioned. It's been 6 years since the last game was released so I don't think there are hoardes of tinies wanting to play it.

no worries, WW !

We're not gamers at all, though DH used to be, but I am very aware that DD (9) isn't the kind of child to self-regulate and even just on the ipad watching YouTube, she can be monstrous when you tell her times up. So, aside from the violence aspect, which I also don't like seeing normalized, I feel very aware of the addictive nature of screens. Possibly unnecessarily so.

Curious, which board games?

Interesting you mention tablets actually - mine are totally fine with being told to turn off the Xbox or switch, but when it comes to tablet games and YouTube they’re right little shits. Hence why they’ve been indefinitely confiscated!

we had ipad-free January, it was lovely. She now gets half an hour, Saturdays and Sundays and actually now seems fine with that.

"I don't know why it always takes exactly one post before GTA is mentioned. It's been 6 years since the last game was released so I don't think there are hoardes of tinies wanting to play it."

Probably because games are the tool of the devil on MN and it's an easy one to pick out as an example of why they're evil.

I'd rather my kid was playing a game than staring mindlessly into the TV tbh!

The problem with age ratings is having a blanket rule that being alive for a certain amount of days makes it suitable or not. It really isn't that simple, it depends on the individual child in question.

I started working at 13, moved out at 17 and rented my own flat in a different place to where I grew up. Whereas a lot of my friends went off to uni at 18 and while some were totally fine and flourished, others struggled immensely with budgeting,independence and being away from home etc.

In some households children can be the main carer to their parents or siblings other households some parents still tidy the rooms and do laundry of 20 year olds.

Thank you all for the very reasonable advice and pointers - this has been a very useful discussion for me.

I think I won't change anything for now but probably will be more permissive on borderline titles like Super Smash Bros in future.

Definitely no Fortnite though!

The games are advisory not law, sonfor me it goes on the child, not the advisor rating.

It completely depends on the game and the child. DS10 is allowed to play Fortnite because I'm a gamer and I understand parental controls. I find Minecraft more graphic.

He's also allowed to play the online mode of the latest COD with his friends. Despite being an 18, you can turn off graphic content, meaning it's no different gameplay wise to Fortnite and if chat is private, there's no risk of hearing swearing in online rooms.

GTA on the other hand, he certainly won't be playing until he's much older.

And yes, most computer games have some sense of killing "baddies", smashing things up etc. There are a few that don't, such as Portal or Animal Crossing, but the Mario games, Sonic games, Zelda etc all include an element of violence. And they're all great.