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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

They’re headhunting for DH’s job while he’s in it

122 replies

user47000000000 · 12/02/2019 09:49

DH heard from an industry connection that his job is being headhunted for on the quiet. Background is that his organisation is hyper critical and aggressive with horrible blame culture. He didn’t get a great review last year and an employee submitted a grievance against him (which wasn’t upheld) last year as well. He spoke to his boss last year and said he felt concerned he would lose his job and was completely reassured this was not the case and was told he was being paranoid.

We spoke to a solicitor who said that because he’s been in the organisation less than two years they can just get rid of him and pay only his notice.

This seems ridiculous. Is anyone able to offer any advice? Now poor DH has to go into work every day wondering if this is the day he’ll be told to leave. His organisation have no clue that he knows his role is being recruited for. He is obviously starting to look for a job on the quiet now but he (and I) are incredibly stressed as he’s the main breadwinner and the solicitor told us that legally they didn’t even have to pay his notice period.

Thanks in advance for any advice.

Posting in AIBU for traffic.

OP posts:
DerelictWreck · 12/02/2019 09:53

If his notice is in his contract, then it's very unlikely they'll even try to get out of paying notice. Not to mention big firms (which I'm assuming this is) are unlikely to want the bad feeling and reputation caused by ill-feeling from ex-staff.

If I were him and feeling petulant, I'd express my interest to the headhunter/apply and let his boss realise he knows. But then I can be a bit like that.

MrsPinkCock · 12/02/2019 10:20

I don’t think the solicitor would have told you they don’t have to pay notice. I think what you mean is he doesn’t have to be paid in lieu of working his notice period, which is true.

I’m not sure what further advice you want if a solicitor has already given up their time for you, presumably for free, and told you what the legal position is.

Look for another job is all I can add and he’s already doing that.

Aquamarine1029 · 12/02/2019 10:26

I'm afraid all your husband can do is look for a new job as aggressively as possible.

Somethingsmellsnice · 12/02/2019 10:30

I suspect the solicitor said he could be asked to leave immediately (in which case they will pay him for the notice period) or that they can make him stay for the notice period.

Definitely get looking for a new job.

AstralTraveller · 12/02/2019 10:45

I don't think there's any harm in his letting the company know that he knows what they are up to. It might be just enough to make them back down.

Fatbutt · 12/02/2019 10:47

@DerelictWreck If I were him and feeling petulant, I'd express my interest to the headhunter/apply and let his boss realise he knows. But then I can be a bit like that.

You are not alone, this was my first thought too!

Purplecatshopaholic · 12/02/2019 10:50

Oooft, that sounds brutal. I am afraid legally he has no employment rights if he hasnt been there 2 years. That doesnt mean they should take advantage of that, but they could depending on the culture of the organisation. He needs to find a new job pronto!

punishmepunisher · 12/02/2019 10:50

Nowt you can do if he's been there less than 2 years.

Loopytiles · 12/02/2019 10:51

Ouch, poor DH. It’s a shame, but there are no unfair dismissal rights for two years, so there’s no redress. In that situation I’d work hard to seek a new job.

It seems unlikely though that they won’t pay for his notice.

lucy101101 · 12/02/2019 10:52

It is horrible to realise what is happening behind his back... but it is better to have learnt this earlier rather than later so that he can secretly look for a new job too. It sounds like your DH might have had a lucky escape from a terrible company...

IncrediblySadToo · 12/02/2019 10:52

How much longer before he has been two years?

badlydrawnperson · 12/02/2019 10:53

I sympathise (really) but looking in from the outside - why the hell would anyone want to stay at an organisation that is hyper critical and aggressive with horrible blame culture.

It can't be any good for his (or your) mental health.

Rather than looking for way to survive and cling on to a terrible job in a toxic organisation (until the next time they do something evil) he needs to focus immediately on getting a better job.

WitsEnding · 12/02/2019 10:53

Yes, look for another job. However, just because they are headhunting doesn't mean they will find a suitable candidate.

XH was headhunted to his current role, but also approached for another post which he failed to get and which remained unfilled for at least a couple of years.

user47000000000 · 12/02/2019 10:53

Yes. My thought was to get him to sign himself off because of all the work stress. Then look for a job full time. He’s nervous about doing that as he thinks that will expedite it all and he wants to find another job as quick as poss. There’s not much around which is a major issue.

So legally they can literally just say “it’s not working out, here’s your notice” even though he hasn’t actually done anything?

OP posts:
Grace212 · 12/02/2019 10:54

I agree it's very unlikely they wouldn't pay his notice

how far short of 2 years is he? and is it a time consuming process for filling this role?

If he got past 2 years, as well as looking for work, I'd be inclined to tip management the wink that I knew, and then see if they could come up with a nice "consultancy" work at home type arrangement and slightly alter things so DH still gets paid for a while but doesn't have to go in.

CountessVonBoobs · 12/02/2019 10:55

It sounds like he'd be much better off out of there anyway - and at least you have in fact had advance warning. It would be worse if he'd just been given his walking papers as a bolt from the blue, rubbish as I'm sure it feels for him walking into work now.

The only things he can do are a) disconnect emotionally from the current job and realise nothing there is important to him now or personal, and b) job hunt aggressively. I'd also suggest the two of you review your budget and try to build as much of a savings cushion as you can.

user47000000000 · 12/02/2019 10:55

It’s 9 mths till he’s at the 2 yr mark.

And yes we both fully agree it isn’t the best business but we live quite remotely so there aren’t many opportunities without travelling into the city which would mean he’d never see our young kids. It’s a trade off really. Also if he had to work further away I might have to leave my job (which I love!)

OP posts:
Grace212 · 12/02/2019 10:55

x post

I agree that being signed off sick might expedite things and presumably you mean not in a good way?

userschmoozer · 12/02/2019 10:55

DH heard from an industry connection that his job is being headhunted for on the quiet.

Does he have any way to find out if that is true?

user47000000000 · 12/02/2019 10:56

Obviously him staying there isn’t an option now anyway...

OP posts:
CountessVonBoobs · 12/02/2019 10:57

I wouldn't recommend signing himself off with "stress" - for starters, he will have to lie to both his work and medical professionals and it might well push them into terminating him citing attendance issues. It will also be a potential legacy at a new job to have a period of long term sick to explain.

Delatron · 12/02/2019 10:57

I’d see this as a blessing (hard I know). He needs to start acting like he has lost the job, so lots of interviews, meetings with contacts in the industry. He needs to put all his effort in to finding a job while he is still in employment.

They sound like a shitty company to work for so ultimately he wouldn’t want to stay there.

It will probably take them a while to find someone and as he is still in the position they won’t be in a massive hurry so I think you have time!

Bluntness100 · 12/02/2019 10:57

I think if he's been there less than two years, has had a bad review, a grievance against him, and doesn't like the culture, then for both sides it would be better if he left, it doesn't seem a good fit for him.

They will make the change before the two years, he needs to find a new job ASAP, if you need the money, then he should not push the issue and say he knows, as they will likely just end it immediately.

Mookatron · 12/02/2019 10:58

This is shit, sorry, but time to start planning for a worst case scenario. If he is senior, are people likely to have a long notice period? You need to be cutting right back financially to save as much as possible. Find out if your mortgage has a payment holiday option. Of course he needs to be looking for a new job - recruitment agencies probs quickest.

It is a really rubbish situation but being prepared might make you feel less bad about it.

Atalune · 12/02/2019 10:58

Could you please answer the questions-

How long has he been working there?
What’s the industry?
What were the actions/outcomes from his last review and has he achieved them?
Does he want to stay, and can he turn this around?