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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go on skiiing hol despite DSIL?

129 replies

bluetheskyis · 11/02/2019 14:53

Need advice from skiers, preferably ‘bigger’ ones. Booked to go on a family ski holiday at Xmas with friends, not a posh place think family friendly not very trendy! Was really excited as never been skiing, kids will love it etc. Love idea of daily exercise, fresh air, & socialising with friends in evening. DSIL, who prides herself on being forthright took me aside and told me that there’s no way I can do it - I’ll be embarrassing myself ( and DP, kids) because I’m not fit enough and too fat. She reckons I won’t find ski clothes to wear anyway. And people will be staring, i’ll Slow everyone down, ski lift will be an issue.
Should I pull out? I’ve just paid deposit so there is time.
I’m currently size 18/20 but aiming to be at least 14/16 by Xmas as currently dealing with the weight issue, eating healthier, swim/ walk/play tennis or something every single day at the mo and losing 4-7 lbs a month. Which I feel is sustainable.
Am worried that I will be too fat to ski at 14-16 and will be surrounded by skinny, fit skiers even in the ski school.
Anyone on here plus size and gone ski-in gas a beginner?? I’d hate to miss out on the family holiday it will let them go ahead without me if it’s going to be a disaster.

OP posts:
cstaff · 11/02/2019 15:08

She is some bitch pretending to be a friend. I was skiing a few years ago and at the time was a size 18. It would have been better if I was fitter and slimmer but it didn't stop me. Would she be jealous?

Original poster
bluetheskyis · 11/02/2019 15:08

Thanks! All very heartening! For the record I told her that I’d see it as a challenge and love being outdoors so would be making the best of it. She can be nice but generally wears her insecurities on her sleeve as far as i’m Concerned so I almost feel sorry for her most of the time. Yay skiiing!! Looking forward to getting knackered in the snow!

OP posts:
ShakeYourTailFeathers · 11/02/2019 15:09

She's talking utter bollocks. I see all shapes and sizes on the ski hill.

Sukochicha · 11/02/2019 15:10

It would be better to be lighter and fitter, but it’s not going to stop you having a good time and learning to ski.

NanFlanders · 11/02/2019 15:10

Have been downhill skiing as an 18 and cross-country skiing when bigger. Enjoyed it very much both times.

TheExtraGuineaPig · 11/02/2019 15:13

God she sounds horrible and I hope you told her how unkind she is!

I'm quite slim and absolutely awful at skiing. Just has a lesson and the instructor was in his 60s, tubby and brilliant. Go for it, there will be lots of people your size and bigger - it's got nothing to do with it x

Springwalk · 11/02/2019 15:13

WTF are you serious???
20 stone men use the lifts! As for clothing they have all sizes, or you can just bring your own if you want.
I really hope you are not skiing with her, and if you are push her down the bloody mountain and do the world a favour.

TweetleBeetlesBattle · 11/02/2019 15:13

Forthright? Nonsense, that's just bitchy and she's talking shite. Bigger people go skiing all the time and of course there will be clothes to fit. I'm a terrible skier but I do enjoy it. You don't have to be madly fit to do it, it's much more about the attitude you go with so you get up again when you fall down. A months worth of squats beforehand will prepare your legs too. You'll have a great time, stuff her and her attitude, go!

DorothyZbornak · 11/02/2019 15:13

Wow! What a cow. I went skiing a couple of years ago with some friends. I'm a size 6-8 and spent most of the time in my arse while my size 16-18 friend was bloody brilliant. Neither of us had been skiing before.
Pay no attention to your SIL.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 11/02/2019 15:15

OK. So next time she mentions it:

Good job you're not coming, I won't be embarassing you!

Fuck Off You Utter Bitch!

Do you feel better now you've tried to humiliate me?

Or tell your DH that his sister / DB that his wife has fucking mouth on her and you won't be held responsible if you reply in kind!

But mainly, fuck her! Don't let her insecuritiies ruin your year or your holiday. Some people make their own lives miserable by being so fucking horrid to friends and family... pity her... and then ignore her!

Oysterbabe · 11/02/2019 15:16

She's talking shit, ignore her.

AlexaAmbidextra · 11/02/2019 15:16

Prides herself on being forthright

Enjoys being a fucking nasty, rude cow in other words. ☹️

seastargirl · 11/02/2019 15:17

You really need to go and get some skiing lessons in secret, imagine what her face will be like if you just sashayed down the slopes without a care in the world!

prettybird · 11/02/2019 15:17

Enjoy yourself.Smile Skiing is brilliant fun.

If you're not going until Christmas, you've got plenty of time to get fit - whether you do or don't lose weight. If you have limited time, I'd prioritise working on your core muscles - they make such a difference to making skiing easier.

If you have time, I'd highly recommend going to a Sno-Zone (or similar) or a dry ski slope, so you'v managed to get some of the very basics under your belt. I've never skiied on a dry ski slope, but I'm told that if you have a few lessons on a plastic slope, then skiing on 8real* snow seems so much easier! Grin

Enjoy!

SovietKitsch · 11/02/2019 15:17

Agree with everyone else, don’t worry about your size. But do work on your fitness, learning to ski is hard work physically - and even once you can do it reasonably well you’ll want strong thigh muscles!

Can you get yourself to one of the indoor ski centres a handful of times before you go? If you’ve mastered the basics it will make long days skiing much more pleasurable rather than just a slog.

EyeOfTheTigger · 11/02/2019 15:18

Wow! What a cow your SIL is!!

If you maintain your current exercise/healthy eating regime then there's plenty of time to lose a few dress sizes before Christmas, and you'll be surprised how much active you'll feel as the pounds drop off. I've so far lost 2.5 stone on my own weight loss journey, which has seen me drop two dress sizes, so no reason why you can't do it too. I think you'd benefit from having some lessons at ski school at your resort, rather than going straight on the big slopes. Does the resort have some easy runs? The first time I ever went skiing it was for a week and I was completely knackered after, but it was so much fun. I hope you can use the excitement of the holiday as incentive to carry on with your fitness goals. Just think of the pleasure you'll have sticking your fingers up at your SIL and telling her what a great time you had. Grin

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 11/02/2019 15:20

My former ski instructor friend wears an 18 and gets around just fine on those slopes. You need a certain level of fitness and technique but weight doesn’t really come into it. Time you got forthright straight back with rude bitch SIL.

needsahouseboy · 11/02/2019 15:21

Jesus I'm 5 foot tall and a size 16 and I can still ski. No one really stared, I found ski clothes easily, the lifts were fine.

You will find it hard as most new skiers do, Do some specific exercises for skiing and you'll be fine.

Tell your sil she is a nasty bitch

Lovewineandchocs · 11/02/2019 15:21

Yes, strong thigh and calf muscles are the key-I really struggled the first time I went (I was a size 14 and there were loads bigger there, BTW) as I’d only been to a dry slope a few times. Second time much easier as more lessons and had done a lot of hillwalking before going on the holiday.
Can I just ask, is this bitch some kind of expert on ski-ing? Has she ever been? She sounds massively jealous and/or projecting her own insecurities. Either way, sod her! Get fit for your own sake and have a great time Grin

Whocansay · 11/02/2019 15:23

She's a nasty cow. Ignore her. She's dead wrong. When you go skiing you see people of all different shapes and sizes, and people with different levels of experience from beginners to the highly experienced. It's a great family experience. I expect she's a bit jealous of you, tbh.

kittykarate · 11/02/2019 15:24

Your SIL is being a bit of a cowbag to be honest. I've learned both downhill and crosscountry skiing as a size 20. I wasn't even the fattest person on the slopes (crosscountry is a bit different, they're a lot more athletic) . The T bar lifts didn't catch fire dragging me up the hill. I don't do chairlifts but don't see that being a problem.

You can get skiwear in size 20+ (Dare2B).

whatnametouse · 11/02/2019 15:24

In a ski resort at the moment - loads of people of all sizes skiing so don’t worry - everyone is bulky in ski wear

If you can get a couple of lessons before you come as you will enjoy it better if you enjoy the first couple of days

Enjoy the holiday!!

samG76 · 11/02/2019 15:24

What a cow! As for slowing everyone down, it's not people going at 28mph rather than 35mph that slows down groups - it is people having to adjust their boots, take calls, etc etc.

rookiemere · 11/02/2019 15:28

What a complete bitch.
You can lose weight if you want to, but she is forever burdened with that horrible attitude.

Like anyone of any size going skiing, I'd advise working on lower body, core strength and general cardio fitness. Presumably as a total beginner you'll be having lessons anyway. Decathlon sell ski gear up to XXL although it is sized smaller than normal clothing but I'm sure you'll find gear somewhere - you're not exactly the only person over a size 14 who has ever gone skiing.

Now as to if you still want to go on holiday with such a nasty piece of work, thats a different question.

FeedMeBooks · 11/02/2019 15:30

All high street outdoor shops sell ski kit up to size 18. I've skied in size 18 just fine in Europe & USA. Go and have fun !