To have called the police?

[imadethedecision]

Over a year now of listening to my neighbour verbally abuse his wife every single weekend without fail when he’s drunk.
He’s almost retirement age and the stuff he screams at his wife is vile.
I’ve asked for advice on here before and it’s been a 50:50 divide of some people saying that reporting it would make it worse for her and others saying I should report it.
I’m almost certain it is just verbal abuse, not physical from the things he’s screaming, and during his 3 hour rants she stays totally silent.
She’s pretty timid and won’t even look you in the eye out on the street.
Anyway tonight I made the decision to report it.
He’s been screaming at her solidly since around 2pm and his language is vile.
I hope it doesn’t make things worse for her.
Also selfishly worried he’ll know it’s me and I’ve got young kids in the house.

I just hope the silence and him driving off isn't because he's done something to his wife. Is she alive and well as far as you know?

Please do keep calling. I wish someone had called the police when my dad was drunk and caused arguements and screamed at my mum all weekend. Instead the curtain twitchers called the council and complained about the length of our grass

Maybe they thought the council would pick up on tensions, don’t forget it’s not that long ago that the police would ignore dv as it was a matter between husband and wife

I’ve not seen her since, but that’s not unusual. I only see her a couple of times a week maybe.
And he’s back as his car was there today.

Bloody police turned up at my door today too to try and fill in some domestic violence form.
Baring in mind I called up anonymously and all they had was my phone number.
They tracked my address down through my phone number and the alcoholic neighbour probably saw them and has put 2 and 2 together.
I was a bit pissed off about that to be honest.

Yeah, I'd be pissed off about that too!

I can't believe the police did that! That's awful!

This is the sort of thing that puts people off reporting this stuff.

Please file a complaint. They should respect the fact you made an anonymous complaint.

Yeah respect your anonymity at all cost because it's only a domestic with a life at stake and be more concerned with the sale of your property than reporting crime....saving a life....

Your statement may be the catalyst that helps with a victimless prosecution but you don't want to lose that precious sale.....

Our ndn know it was me!! Thanked me even I kid you not.
You have done nowt wrong op.

www.problemneighbours.co.uk/what-you-have-declare-about-neighbours-when-selling.html

FWIW that should give some guidance on what needs declaring the matter of selling your home, as the conflict is not with you directly I reckon you should be o.k....

Thanks @Buster72 that’s really useful.
And the police had my phone number. They could have called me for info. Like when I happily answered the phone to them on the day I reported it.
Not entirely sure why they had to come to my address? Anyway it’s done now. But if I do need to call up again I’ll explicitly say once again that I do not want Police calling at my house.

You have done right to report and should continue.

However if when the police arrive they both deny it and she does not want to make any statement I don't think that the police can do anything.

I think you did the right thing. You may have done her a massive favour OP.

Bloody police turned up at my door today too to try and fill in some domestic violence form.
Baring in mind I called up anonymously and all they had was my phone number.
They tracked my address down through my phone number and the alcoholic neighbour probably saw them and has put 2 and 2 together.
I was a bit pissed off about that to be honest.

Id be furious at that. I mean if he did put 2 and 2 together the cops may well have put you at risk if he angry they been called
It would put me off calling at all.
Yeah respect your anonymity at all cost because it's only a domestic with a life at stake and be more concerned with the sale of your property than reporting crime....saving a life....
Your statement may be the catalyst that helps with a victimless prosecution but you don't want to lose that precious sale....

Its not just about a sale. By rocking up like that, the cops have given the neighbor good reason to point finger at op for reporting. Depending on how far he want to take it the op could be in danger now. Its also a safety issue

Dammit this site needs an edit post feature...

Interesting that she's also intoxicated, I assumed it was just him. I'm appalled at them turning up at your door, that could be potentially dangerous for you!

If they were both blind drunk could it be possible that neither remembers the abuse he hurls at her in the morning? Will he remember the police going to speak to them if he was passed out pissed? I really think you did the right thing reporting it and it is absolutely absurd that the police turned up at your home! What is this FFS, Hot Fuzz? Surely they must have more sense than that? I'd be fuming about that and definitely let them know how stupid that was of them. But well done for reporting it OP x

As the op stated, they needed to complete a form....it maybe used in court, or to strengthen a dvn. It may need a signature.....when you can get one of those down the phone I am sure it will be done that way.

They could have phoned her and asked her to come to the station to fill it in though.

I think you did the right thing. I agree with Thera saying to try and record it and keep reporting every time it happens and as soon as it starts. I’d query why they came to the house to talk to you. I’d be worried that the neighbour noticed and put two and two together. People like him are arseholes and I’d worry I’d be the next target.

From one of the OPs updates :

Police just called. / They spoke to them both. / Both fast asleep/passed out and denying all knowledge.

and

Police did say that they were both very intoxicated, so perhaps they’re both just bumbling round the house being abusive to each other.

I suspect nothing will happen, some people just have ghastly, gobby and loud relationships. You've not said there is any physical violence - and I know emotional is getting a much higher profile.

@Buster72 The thing is, if the police don't respect people's anonymity, they'll be less likely to report a crime through fear of repercussions.

I think the main thing with most people is fear for their family's safety.

They could have phoned her and asked her

Exactly there was no need to rock up on her doorstep

if the police don't respect people's anonymity, they'll be less likely to report a crime through fear of repercussions.
I think the main thing with most people is fear for their family's safety.

Exactly
It would put me off reporting anything. My family safety comes first.

Most people say no they dont want to be involved if they phone them, though. If they rock up on the doorstep co-operation is more likely. Sad but true.

At the end of the day everyone wants the police to sort it out but that takes evidence, and no one wants to provide it. Not the witnesses and not the victim. And so it continues.

**Most people say no they dont want to be involved if they phone them, though. If they rock up on the doorstep co-operation is more likely. Sad but true.

At the end of the day everyone wants the police to sort it out but that takes evidence, and no one wants to provide it. Not the witnesses and not the victim. And so it continues.**

If they rocked up on my door adf ter an anonymous call id tell them to leave if i was worried for my safety. They wont get anything out of me.

Well its not the publics fault trust in cops is low......