Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have absolutely zero sympathy for DS

52 replies

TinklyLittleLaugh · 08/02/2019 20:46

DS1 was in a relationship for four years at uni, which ended pretty badly and basically broke his heart. For a year or so afterwards he was very down and put himself about a bit.

Anyway, he struck up a friendship with a nice girl at work (who was quite similar to his ex in looks and personality) and seemed quite keen for a while. Nice girl likewise developed a big crush on DS. DS then decided he only wanted to be friends and, to rub salt into the wound, asked her for her very pretty friend’s details.

DS dated very pretty girl for a while, nice girl was understandably cheesed off and wanted nothing to do with either of them. DS then decided very pretty girl was a bit boring and wheedled his way back into nice girl’s friendship, though still wanted nothing more.

Fast forward a year DS now has a new job, in a new city, still regularly chats to nice girl on the phone. Is currently dating someone in new city. Today nice girl tells him she has got engaged to an old flame. DS rings me up absolutely devastated. Thinks she might have been the one, is kicking himself for not making a move.

He’s a total idiot isn’t he? I have absolutely no sympathy. He only wants the poor girl because she has found someone else. How on earth have I managed to raise such a fuckwit?

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 08/02/2019 20:48

he just wants what he cant have

Yes he is an idiot

GreenTulips · 08/02/2019 20:49

LOL! Well that’s a life lesson learnt - but he’s still young and if she was the one he wouldn’t have let her go would he?

His loss

Petalflowers · 08/02/2019 20:51

He had his chance. He’ll get over him.

Serialweightwatcher · 08/02/2019 20:52

Yes - problem a lot of times is that teens think if someone is keen they always will be, so they go for the ones who are more exciting/prettier etc etc and expect the nice ones to hang about - living and learning the hard way like a lot of us did/do

Prisonbreak · 08/02/2019 20:53

Haha you sound like my mum. No nonsense, tell it like it is. You are my kind of person :)

TheyGotMyName · 08/02/2019 20:54

Ahh young love.... remember the days...thabk god they are over.... your son is male ... it nothing you particularly did... most of them are idiots op... that's why man was created first.... you need a rough draft before a masterpiece 😂

Sparkletastic · 08/02/2019 20:55

YANBU. And let's hope this eliminates his cockwomble tendencies forevermore.

Parthenope · 08/02/2019 20:58

What did you say when Mr Fickle rang you to wail? Did you bite his head off?

PositivelyPERF · 08/02/2019 20:59

I love you, OP. I wish more parents had your attitude and maybe we’d have less people feeling so entitled. 🍷 💐 🍫 🍰 🍦 Fill your boots.

Gruzinkerbell1 · 08/02/2019 21:00

Yup, he only wants her now because she's unavailable. He thought she had him on a pedestal...wrong! Tough lesson to learn.

PositivelyPERF · 08/02/2019 21:00

that's why man was created first.... you need a rough draft before a masterpiece That’s incredibly sexist!

But absolutely hilarious. 🤣

LakieLady · 08/02/2019 21:02

How on earth have I managed to raise such a fuckwit?

He's got a Y chromosome, that increases the possibility of growing up to be a fuckwit by the power of 10.

It's not your fault. Grin

Singlenotsingle · 08/02/2019 21:03

He's put nice girl on ice twice and gone off with someone else. Did he expect her to wait around forever? Men are ruled by what's in their pants (especially young men).

Original poster
TinklyLittleLaugh · 08/02/2019 21:09

What did you say when Mr Fickle rang you to wail?

I basically said what you guys are saying: life lesson learned, next time don’t be distracted by the pretty face. And don’t you dare give her an inkling of how you are feeling and mess her around again. Just smile and say you hope she will be happy.

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 08/02/2019 21:13

Excellent advice.

Nothininmenoggin · 08/02/2019 21:13

Brilliant OP no mollycoddling he has to suffer the consequences of mucking the "nice girl" about. Let's hope he meets another nice girl soon and keeps hold of her.

SassitudeandSparkle · 08/02/2019 21:19

Love the masterpiece, TheyGotMyName Grin Grin

BartonHollow · 08/02/2019 21:23

If it wasn't for the age difference I'd swear I've been your DS's nice girl who he only wanted to be friends with yet was livid with rage at the thought of anyone else - it is spectacularly shit

Mummyoflittledragon · 08/02/2019 21:24

TheyGotMyName
Brilliant!

Tinkly
I’m with you. Your ds treated this young woman badly. I hope she’s happy and one day he will be too. It actually sounds more like he’s struggling to discover who he truly is and needs to be more grounded.

PyongyangKipperbang · 08/02/2019 21:24

Bollocks was she "The One" he doesnt like that she isnt there fanning his ego anymore. He had wanted her he would have been with her.

I am happy for her that she has found happiness, and hopefully she got a little thrill of "HA!!" when she told him as I am sure she will have picked up on his pissed offedness.

Bringbackthestripes · 08/02/2019 21:24

He kept her at arms length because he didn’t want to get hurt again.....and now he’s hurting.

You gave him excellent advice, he will get over her eventually.

ToeToToe · 08/02/2019 21:28

"He wants the one he can't have" is spot on.

I don't know what advice I'd give to him tbh. Stop being an arse to women, maybe.

Santaclarita · 08/02/2019 21:28

She was a back up to him, nothing more. He's just annoyed his back up no longer wants him. He's an idiot but least you told him that. Well done 🙂

recrudescence · 08/02/2019 21:29

A self-inflicted wound is still painful.

DonkeyAtemyHomework · 08/02/2019 21:30

He'll be grand tomorrow.