To call the teacher by his first name?

[MrsWhatToDo]

More wwyd I guess but here it is...
So my ds has been having some issues in class and its become necessary to colaborate with his form tutor. Secondary school.
This is my situation. I emailed teacher addressed to Mr Lastname and signed Firstname Lastname.
His reply came back - To Mrs Lastname Signed Firstname
My response - To Mr Lastname Signed Firstname
His response - To Firstname Signed Firstname

Would it be weird to address him as Firstname? I've held back from doing so in emails as we now have a meeting set up for next Monday morning and don't want it to be weird. I won't use his first name in emails if I don't in person. Personally I would prefer to be called by Firstname and so far he has only ever signed as his first name.
This is going to be ongoing communication so it matters going forward.
I know its first world problems / Britsh etiquette but I'd really like some wider opinions.

It's a funny one. Schools have got way out of line with real world practice. I work for a big multinational company and everyone addresses everyone including the CEO by first names. Noone ever calls me Ms Kind, I would struggle to sign off an email with it as just feels stuffy and alien. And I don't expect teachers to remember my surname as it doesn't match the kids anyway.

The kids I do reading with seem to refer to me as "that reading person" or "that teacher there" (which I then feel in the interests of honesty I have to disown!). It was easier when I had DD's class, then I was just DD's Mum.

Mind you I don't think in a 1:1 meeting I'd naturally use someone's name anyway. It's when there are more people and you need to refer to someone in the third person that it gets awkward.

Thank you all
This is how i feel. I honestly thought i would get a whole lot of people saying 'oh no. Unprofessional etc' or 'I'd find that too weird'!
Interesting that I have gotten the opposite!
DontTouch - Thank you for sharing my pain anyway!

Oops! Got to love the refresh page! I replied from page 1!

I err on the side of formality in initial communication.
If I am in a strop, I will remain with the formalities. If they have appeased me and have dummied down, I'll go with their way of addressing me.

E.g.
Dear Sir
Blah blah blah has happened. I would like to hear your feedback. Blah Blah
Yours faithfully
Don Messwime

If they respond with

Dear Don
We have now resolved your matter blah bla,
Kind regards
Juan Julio

In that case further correspondence would be Dear Juan

If they respond with

Dear Don
We see no reason to pursue your complaint blah blah
Juan Julio

Response will be:

Dear Mr. Julio

JellySlice - That really made me laugh
Crockof - I think you have hit the nail on the head
Helloha - Im crying!
Yabbers - Yep. Being rude is exactly my concern. Using Mr Lastname when he has clearly written Firstname on every correspondence seems like keeping someone at arms length. However, then the respect question/upbringing kicks in.

As some have suggested i think I'll stick with Mr Lastname when students are around and Firstname at other times.

My god social etiquette vs humanity!

I have to openly laugh about avoiding name use... its Exactly what Ive done in the last two correspondences. I didnt write any name! And still signed Firstname!
Im glad to hear other people gave struggled with this! I was starting to think i was bonkers!

Op if you are meeting him in person, just say hello Mr (whatever his last name is)...if he responds call me (his first name)...then you know it's ok to use his first name...

You've reached a resolution now so I'm a bit late to the party here!

I just wanted to say that I do the same, in front of children Mrs Lastname and in correspondence initially Mrs Lastname but if they respond by signing first name then I'd move forward on a first name basis.

One thing I just wanted to mention about respect was it's a two way thing.Teachers do a wonderful job and I'm hugely grateful to the support my children have had, but a teacher is not my superior. We are meeting as equals. If they refer/address me by my first name I'd feel mightily aggrieved if I couldn't call them by their first name in return. Having to continue to use their surname while they addressed me by my first name would imply deference. It's about mutual respect and being on an even footing so don't feel bad about using their first name if they're using yours.

I would call them by their first names and expect to be called by my first name. We are adults after all. Obvs the kids use the proper titles...

Thing which freaks me out is parenrs signing off with a kiss!!

Parents

Or when their email address inappropriate refers to a part of their body!

TwinMummy - That is an extremely good point! Thank you.
Clairdelalune - my gosh i autopilot put kisses on messages all the time then have to delete them before i send! I live in constant fear that I'll forget myself one day! You've got me curious about those email addreses!?

I use whatever they sign off with. Can’t go wrong.

Wouldn’t bother me as a teacher.

I always umm and ahh about whether to sign off as MissTunnocks or just Firstname. I tend to do firstname

Hahah I have this from the other side as am a teacher but DS also attends the school I teach at. So at parties the parents panic a bit most Still call me Mrs Cupcake, but some who I’ve known years call me Unicorn. I’m not on the year WhatsApp group, DH deals with that as I feel it’s a conflict of interest, but I’ll occasionally reply via text to individual parents for birthday party invites etc. Then I’ll call myself Unicorn. What’s sweet is that all of them if they email me at work or see me at school events such as the Carol Service or parents evening call me Mrs Cupcake.

It’s very complicated but seems to work

I never sign off my emails to parents with my first name, but will sign off Mrs C if it’s a chatty email, but Mrs Cupcake if it’s a formal one.

I would opt for the classic British approach of going to desperate lengths to avoid saying his name at all during the meeting.

This ^ would be me

I have got 3 dc through a total of 7 schools between them though without ever calling a teacher from their school by their first name.
Same as I call my Dr by their surname if I refer to them / need to use a name for some reason to address them.
Might be generational thing.