to sometimes find it infuriating trying to have a discussion with DP

[FourCrumpets]

NC because I'm very irritated right now and I don't trust myself to be coherent

Been with DP for almost a year and everything's great. Now that we're comfortable with each other though, I'm sometimes finding it very hard to have any sort of discussion with him!

We were just out doing the weekly shop (it's our day off), he saw something he disapproved of, declared that "that's idiotic", and when I tried to counter that statement he simply said, "It's obvious why. I can't talk to you when you're being stupid." DP prides himself on being "very smart" which I don't necessarily dispute but really now?

This has only happened maybe 4 times so far with topics ranging from parking to "which lifestyle is better" (vague but won't go into details cause it is too specific and might be outing).

AIBU to start doubting this whole fucking relationship?

No no NO!

No saying you're stupid or thinking it must be you. I said and did that. You're responsible for your own behaviour, as he is his.

I married one of these. It doesn’t get better. Don’t be me. Take your chance to get out now

Oh lovely got a text from "D"P saying "No need to be so sensitive. I'll just agree with everything you say in the future, ok?" fgs.

Oh. Passive aggression.
I'm not going to tell you what to do, but fuckin' hell mate...

He's very belittling. That's not great.

So text back. 'I've thought about it and we are finished.'

Text back either.
'OK great '

Or
'No need, let's call it a day and you won't have to bother'

Oh no, he’s not a nice man and he’s showing you what he thinks of you. Sorry, that’s got to hurt.

You’re clearly not stupid and he’s horribly belittling.

You say it’s only happened 4 times. That’s in 12 months. So pretty often he makes a point of telling you he thinks your opinion has no value. You’re better than that love.

If it's like this only a year in, Run Away. It will only get worse.

Oddly enough Baby Shark was just playing and saying "Run Away" as I was writing that. Timing.

So, he talks down to you, patronises and belittles you, then accuses you of being overly sensitive.

Ok

Had another argument late last night and I broke up with him. Got a text 2 mins ago saying "Wow you really are stupid. your loss." Logically I know it's better for me to leave but I just wish so much things didn't turn out this way.

Oh what a cock, it's proven that he's definitely not worth it though! As if you'll come running back after he's told you again that you are stupid, fucking bell end he is
for you op, you're better without him.

Don't globalise - it means just because you got together with one aresehole then you believe all men you get together with will be arseholes. Think positive, you've had a close escape.

Stay strong. You are worth so much more than some who needs to put you down to feel good about himself.

What exactly did you see in that tosser? Good riddance!

You are so much better off without this chump.

He thinks he’s more intelligent and important than you and if you don’t agree with him it’s not because he’s wrong, it’s because you’re stupid. That’s his fundamental belief. He expects to go forward in the relationship with that as the basis.

Be glad you’ve figured him for the arrogant, disrespectful, draining waste of time that he is.

“DP prides himself on being "very smart"“

Anyone who declares this about themselves, isn’t. Truly clever people understand, and therefore have, humility. Idiots with their head up their own arse don’t.

Oh god, that would have me raging, he had to have the last word didn’t he? I would have finished it with “it is because I am not stupid that this is over, and it is certainly no loss to me” then deleted and blocked.

But then I wouldnt have let him have the final word 😊 - what a dick, congrats on being free from this abuse. 💐

You’re well rid of that arsehole. It’s clear what his true colours really are.

If you reply to that message, he will know he's getting under your skin and may take pleasure from prolonging your pain.

If you ignore it and block him he will be clueless and powerless.

I advise you to ignore the message and block his number and emails etc.

Well done for spotting this behaviour so early on. You said you were together a year, but had only recently relaxed. So that was 4 incidents in what, 4 months?

Positive thinking: you have your own back and have just saved yourself a world of pain and sadness. Not to mention time.

Don't waste the energy it would take to type out a reply.
It may be small comfort, but at least you won't spend months wishing he would take you back.

He sounds dreadful!

He would slowly chip away at your self esteem and you’d probably end up believing you were stupid because you’d heard it so many times.

He is a prize bellend and you’ve had a lucky escape.

Your boyfriend thinks you're stupid and beneath him and is contemptuous.

Please remember to block him from every form of communication you have.

Let that last little gem be the very last thing you ever get from him. Just ghost him now.

I suspect the lack of response, your total disinterest, will give his superiority complex a little shake!