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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think no wonder I'm bloody ill?

78 replies

BoldComicSans · 05/02/2019 01:01

On Friday I came down with a cold. No biggy, we all get them.
Saturday night I couldn't sleep because I couldn't stop sneezing. Constant coughing and sore throat.

Roll on Monday and I drag myself into work because they are very strict about time off.
I end up taking more than the recommended daily dose of painkillers because I just feel dreadful.

At lunch time instead of eating I go home and have a nap. I feel too hot yet am shivering.

I ask my boss if I can finish for the day because I'm not well and staff around me are complaining that they will catch it.

I am told they can't send me home because other members off staff are also ill and they have not been allowed home.

Is it any wonder we are all bloody ill being forced to come in and share our germs?

Anyway, I now have a temp of 38.4 after paracetamol and am wheezing. My poor chest / stomach seems to be working very hard just to breathe and yet again I can't sleep.

My head feels congested and even my teeth hurt. My upper body feels too hot yet the rest of me cold.

But I have to get my arse into work as usual in 7 hours.

Rant over. Feeling very sorry for myself. Meh.

OP posts:
Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 05/02/2019 07:49

This will probably sound harsh but you are an adult and you make the decision whether to call in sick, or go in to work. Nobody forces you to.

I manage a team and I have several members who come in with a cold and spend the day dramatically shivering, talking in a weak voice, and looking resentfully at me because I dont "force" them to go home and spend a few days on the sofa watching TV. But we have paid sick leave, and they could absolutely just call in sick with no negative consequences unless they abuse it.

I've long ago learnt to let people make their own decision, which they should be competent to do.

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 05/02/2019 07:55

There’s a terrible culture round sickness absence in the UK though, plenty of times I dragged myself in, did a dismal amount of work and gave others my bugs, because my workplace was an arse about taking sick leave.

In Germany it’s opposite, one sniffle and people stay off for a week, you have to really take a lot of time off for it to become an issue in most places. Grin I‘m still rarely off though.

Villanellenovella · 05/02/2019 07:56

I just take a day nurse and carry on.

labazsisgoingmad · 05/02/2019 07:58

do be careful how many painkillers you take id get a dr apt and tell them you are seeking medical advice

Onlyjoinedforthisthread · 05/02/2019 08:03

I think I'd take the day off too but it's hard to know, we don't get sick pay so that's at least one day's pay gone, I could use holidays but that would only leave 9 days as we have to take 10 at Christmas so it's not as easy as some people make out

PoutySprout · 05/02/2019 08:04

they can’t discipline you for doctor sanctioned time off people get ill

Yes they can.

TaimaandRanyasBestFriend · 05/02/2019 08:07

Employee rights will soon be eroded more! YANBU.

TheOrigRightsofwomen · 05/02/2019 08:08

Your mistake was to ask your boss.

If you're ill and need to go home you state "I am unwell and am going home".

Then from home you call in sick.

I understand it's hard when you don't get sick pay or work for some wanky company that "prides itself" on its strict working practises.

It's like everything else - we all muddle along OK, until someone is ill.

I am meant to be at a workshop today (well Mon to Thurs actually). Today is the second day I can't make it because my son is ill and off school. It's very hard to get someone to mind your child when they are will, and the child usually wants a parent to care for them.

DizziLizzy · 05/02/2019 08:08

Agree with @PoutySprout

Yes you can get disciplined even if signed off by the GP.

PoutySprout · 05/02/2019 08:09

I’m on a mission to change this culture in my workplace. Just before Xmas 2 members of staff were really quite unwell with heavy colds. They were told to go home but refused. We hot desk. Three more of us came down with it just before Xmas (I took time off). Over Xmas 2 more were unwell. By the new year another 2 were ill. Last Thursday I worked with my boss who was feeling unwell Kept telling her to go home. She refused. She is now off with flu. So is her boss. And I’m coughing and sneezing again.

I’m feeling okay, but still working from home just to prevent the spread of germs. At our next staff forum I’ll be demonstrating the impact that those 2 staff coming in before Xmas had on the team over the last month or so.

PoutySprout · 05/02/2019 08:11

Agree with @PoutySprout**

Phew. 15 years in HR not wasted. 😂

BIWI · 05/02/2019 08:14

@Tawdrylocalbrouhaha

This will probably sound harsh but you are an adult and you make the decision whether to call in sick, or go in to work. Nobody forces you to.

Oh if only this was true. Lot of people, especially those who work in retail, are pretty much forced to work when they're sick. Or if they go home sick are subject to disciplinary action. DS2 works for a major supermarket chain. He was sent home by his manager because he wasn't well, (D&V so not a good idea to be around fresh food and customers!) but then he was disciplined for being off sick, because he'd been off sick for too many days.

DS is totally committed to his job, and is very rarely ill - he certainly could never be accused of 'swinging the lead'. When he's been off it's because he is really ill. So to be treated this like - it's no wonder people feel that they can't phone in sick, or that they're not in control of things themselves.

TadaTralala · 05/02/2019 08:23

go to GP and get a sick note.Not much your work can do about that.

Ollivander84 · 05/02/2019 08:33

@TadaTralala there is. I had a disciplinary for spinal surgery and if I took any more time off for a year after that I would have been dismissed despite being immunocompromised

DizziLizzy · 05/02/2019 08:40

@TadaTralala don't think that for a minute. It doesn't matter if you have a sick note.... if your work place has a sickness policy (it should) once you have reached a certain number of instances of sick it leads to disciplinary action even with a GP note on each occasion. In my workplace it's 3 in one year.

nutellalove · 05/02/2019 08:47

I understand your struggle and you are correct. My old workplace frowned upon illness Hmm and everyone came in regardless. Bugs spread like wildfire.

New job - they understand and recognise that people are human and get ill! They even encourage people to WFH when they have like a minor cold or something so well enough to work but without spreading germs.

VanGoghsDog · 05/02/2019 08:49

I am told they can't send me home because other members off staff are also ill and they have not been allowed home.

Assuming you are 18+ you don't need anyone's permission to go home, they can't tie you to the desk, slavery is still illegal. Just go home if you're not well enough to work (obviously let someone know).

PoutySprout · 05/02/2019 08:58

Just to balance this, we currently have about a dozen staff at “3rd and final” stage (so they’ve had at least 5 absences in a 12-18 month period) and it’s unlikely that more than 2 would be dismissed.

It sometimes just takes that long to get all of the info on an induvidual’s Condition(s) to be able to understand what they can and can’t do.

Babyboysarenowbig · 05/02/2019 09:03

Just another paracetamol warning, 1 took 2 extra for 2 days, a few weeks ago because I was poorly and told the doctor. Hence me transfered to hospital for bloods with an over night bag in case they had to keep me in. I know it says not to take over the recommended amount but I was a bit ‘it will be fine’. I now know how stupid I was was!

Babyboysarenowbig · 05/02/2019 09:03

Oh and hope you are feeling better! I’ve just had it, it sucks.

recklessruby · 05/02/2019 09:11

I 've just about got over that horrible cold/cough temperature thing. Been at work through it all as nobody could do my work and felt like I would happily die on days 2 and 3.
This is 6 weeks after the last cold!
I work in a school that is "outstanding " and the head thinks it makes it look good for Ofsted when staff sickness is minimal.
All it does is spread bugs around as my colleague has got it now.
Stay off.

ShadyLady53 · 05/02/2019 09:25

YANBU

I spent 6 weeks really ill with a bad case of glandular fever just before Christmas, only getting back to work mid-Jan. I have Neuropoenia and am immunocompromised at the best of times. My work is actually very good about sickness and encourage you to just get well.

However, I’ve had two colds (one that’s now a sinus infection) since going back to work and getting out again due to loads of other people being out and about coughing and sneezing all over the place with no attempt to use tissues or cover their mouths.

The other day in my local Boots Pharmacy, the girl on the till was dreadfully ill. Her nose was bright red and streaming, she was coughing all over the counter, till and customers whilst handing out prescriptions and handling money. I considered making a complaint in writing to Boots saying they needed to look at their staff sickness policy because there is no way she didn’t infect a good few people that day.

There are colds you can work through and practice good hygiene through to avoid the spread but ones like yours, you should never be encouraged to work through.

As for those saying appalling things like they had a disciplinary for a spinal operation etc, how do those employers have a leg to stand on?! Surely they couldn’t dismiss you without attracting a tribunal. The attitude to sickness in the UK is appalling.

TheFuckfaceWhisperer · 05/02/2019 11:28

The other day in my local Boots Pharmacy, the girl on the till was dreadfully ill. Her nose was bright red and streaming, she was coughing all over the counter

Funnily enough I caught my cold in Boots! I was picking up my DD's prescription and a woman came in full of cold, bright red runny nose and coughing everywhere and came in for cold remedies whilst standing RIGHT NEXT TO ME COUGHING ALL OVER ME!! It didn't occur to her to cover her bloody mouth Angry

PregnantSea · 05/02/2019 11:34

It's not just a cold. Get an emergency GP appt first thing in the morning.

Just call work and tell them you'll let them know what the go advises.

kitkatsky · 05/02/2019 11:44

I'm not trying to deliberately miss the point here, but don't take extra painkillers. Even a few extra paracetamol can be incredibly dangerous