To feel a bit lonely now my daughter is in school?

[Mammyofonlyone]

Just that really. She is in year one now and I really, really miss her when she's in school, and look forward massively to the holidays.

I've always been aware that I have missed her since she started in full time school but just this week it has hit me that as well as this, I'm actually really quite lonely.

I have lots of friends locally, walk the dog every day and usually bump into someone I know, I go to two or three exercise classes a week and often run with a friend too. I am also involved with the school (in terms of supporting at events etc) and arrange catch ups for the mothers in my year so I feel like I have a good range of interests but I still feel like I'm rattling around in the house on my own and trying to fill time until school finishes.

I feel a bit of a sad loser admitting this. Does anyone else feel this way, or is it indeed just me? And do you have any suggestions as to what might help?

As a caveat, I know there are much bigger problems in the world than mine, but at the same time I don't like this feeling of loneliness.

What about volunteering at your local food bank, or, listening to the children read at school? I think how you feel is perfectly understandable, and really sweet that you love your daughter so much.

Yes, I definitely don't think home schooling would be right for my child, especially as she's an only one. I place a lot of value on the interaction she gets with others at school, as well as the exposure to activities that would be difficult for me to give her. I'm well aware that for some it works well though, for various reasons

I was like you OP and in the end I started my own small business. It took ten years to establish properly but now it's my main source of income.

I really miss my lo now he's at school, I love the holidays and I'm sad when they are over. I'm a sahm too but I really enjoy my own company luckily, having all this time to myself is amazing! I don't get bored or lonely, I volunteer at the local hospital, I do a bit of casual paid admin 3 or 4 hours a week which was a little job I found through the volunteering. I take pleasure in pottering around. I feel that I'm lucky to be able to do it so it would be a shame not to enjoy it!

Nature abhors a vacuum

You have identified the issue and start looking about for ways to fill the gap and have more meaning for yourself . It might not be any of the suggestions here either OP - but definitely do some thinking

I don't think what you experiencing is unusual at all. I know I'll v sad when my Dc3 goes to school I work 3 days so we've 2 lovely days together & I'll fill the days no problem but still you can't help the feeling! I have a friend with an only she was never career minded & her dh works long hours stressful job so they decided she'd b a sahm which she loved made a network of friends etc but when her dd was a year or two into school she felt like you but still didn't want a 'career' and wanted to be there in hols n afterschool. Did bits of voluntary work etc & eventually got an assistant position in a primary school which suits her perfectly. I have another one who retrained as pharmacy assistant n got a part time job at that. Still have Holiday issue but if you only working couple days or mornings easier to fill in when u add leave to it. I know it's not easy find these elusive jobs but they do come up if u want to go that route!! If you don't volunteering, studying also good options.

YANBU at all. I miss my kids when they're at school and love having them around in the hols.

I don't mean that I pine. I have a very busy social life, am doing a degree and wouldn't change it because I know it's in the kids' best interests etc. I just really like it when they are here too.

Another one saying look for a job. You need to think ahead - you have the rest of your life ahead of you, surely you'll want to work again at some point? Or studying sounds awesome if you're well off. If you're interested in a job in a school, I'd make a list of all the schools, state and private in the surrounding area and check their websites for ads.

I haven't rtft but would you actually like a second child? Is that an option?

I'd love one blackberry but it's sadly not an option for us. I def think this contributes to my sadness

Study or volunteer. I am a charity shop volunteer and do term time only. It's a bit pathetic to be so dependent on a child tbh, you are not just her mother, you are a person in your own right.

what about dinner lady at her school? You'd see her and get term time working

Have you not discussed this with your husband?

Have you thought about retraining to do a job you can do from home?

Or... and I appreciate there may be reasons this isn't possible, and if so I'm sorry, and sorry for bringing it up, but... another baby?

It's a bit pathetic to be so dependent on a child tbh, you are not just her mother, you are a person in your own right.

What a vile thing to say. God forbid a mother miss her child when she's at school.

The way you're feeling is perfectly understandable OP, especially since your DD is your only child. I have no doubt that I will feel the same once my DD starts school. I'm dreading it! I second doing some volunteer work, or if you're crafty you can make and sell things on Etsy or Facebook. Then you have the whole summer holidays free to do lovely things together.

Thx Turn