to not understand people that are afraid of dogs

[Josico58]

Is it not an extremely debilitating and irrational fear? Based on how many dogs there are about in public, how do you go about daily life? And to think they’re all about to attack you for no reason?

I can understand people feeling nervous of a big dog hurtling towards them/their small children, but regular, well behaved dogs in public places. Really a problem?

Don’t mean to sound harsh but it just comes across as a bit pathetic to me.

A friend’s little girl is terrified of my dog. It’s a Cavalier puppy, hardly scary! I admit he can be excitable and full on, and we’re training him not to jump up or lick people. But the mum kind of enables it, picking DD up and saying “it’s OK, he’s not going to get you”. I’m left feeling a bit “Er, get a grip!!”

AIBU?

Sorry, as an animal lover I just can’t understand this seemingly common fear.

I suspect popular opinion will be that I am and I’m ready for the backlash!!

Careered bloody phone :-(

I don’t trust people who don’t like dogs... but I trust my dog when it doesn’t like a person.

I’m the same LOL! Perhaps that’s why I’m totally dumbfounded at the responses here.

My husband used to work in the community as a HCP. He used to get really pissed off about the times he was attacked by service user dogs. He was also pissed off by dogs that werent trained to not jump up as he didn’t want our allergic kids and grandkids to finish up in A and E. Plus quite frankly dogs aren’t hygienic. I can remember leaving my jacket on a friends sofa and her dog shiittng on it and it being smeared in shit.

Don’t worry OP about those silly people being frightened by dogs because the last one who jumped up and wouldnt desists was dropped kicked across the room.

Perhaps that’s why I’m totally dumbfounded at the responses here

Nah. It’s because you have no empathy.

So you can have a phobia of anything except for something you are likely to encounter regularly? You really don’t understand phobias do you?

I feel sorry for that little girl. Over 40 years ago I was that girl. Two loose German shepherds bounded up to me and my cousin crossing a field on the way to school. We were little kids. They were barking and growling. Luckily my auntie managed to pull us to safety and threaten to whack the nearest one with her umbrella. So yes as a child it's bloody scary.
Was afraid of dogs throughout my childhood and wouldn't go to friends houses who had them. Walking to school felt terrifying sometimes. What didn't help was grown adults and dog owners telling me as a frightened 8 year old that I was pathetic. I already felt silly enough when I saw all the other kids being fine with dogs.
As an adult I have conquered my fear mostly as didn't want my dc to have it but I still feel a little panic if a big barking dog off the lead is bounding towards me.
YABU coz everyone is scared of something.
My dd is phobic about spiders but I don't laugh at her despite spiders and insects not bothering me at all.

I don’t like dogs but tolerate those who are owned by people I like
I don’t enjoy having to choose what I wear carefully before visiting - anything dark gets covered in hair
Anything not machine washable is out as I get slobbered over
Can’t wear tights or bare legs in summer as get scratched or laddered when they jump up
Barking every time someone walks past etc
I’m a cat person but do understand there are people who don’t like cats

An animal lover means that you love the animal - it’s what you feel, it’s not facts.

I feel like this is a bait thread but I am willing to bite.

I love dogs too. I like having them around and I think they are amazing animals.
I don’t have right now as they need a lot of care. Much more than my two kids, who will grow up eventually and feed and take care of themselves.

Dogs will follow their conditioning. They will behave as part of a pack and follow hierarchy. In order for a dog to understand his place in the pack you have to be consistent in your own behavior and that towards the dog. Treat for x, no treat for y. Don’t treat dogs as toys or they will pick on the smallest of the pack (children). Working dogs need “jobs”. All dogs need a place to rest where they can retire from “looking out” for their pack. They need care and love and positive reinforcement.

People are often not consistent in their treatments of pets. Hence you cannot trust what a dog will do. I hate when people say “he won’t bite!”. Well you know, he won’t, until that one time. When I have a dog and I interact with it - I take a risk. It’s the same for anyone else around me. People also snap and we speak the same language.
It won’t stop me from sticking my face in my dogs face - but when I do it’s a calculated risk. I would never claim a 100% - my dog won’t bite anyone, including me. This is a careless approach to keeping and living with animals.
It’s also disrespectful - it’s stripping away the animal part of the animal.
As a dog owner it’s your responsibility to make your dog safe and others safe from your dog.

That’s the issue I have with those afraid of dogs - they pass it onto kids. It’s irresponsible.

I’m afraid of flying. Thats why when I fly I sit away from my kids so as not to pass it on - they just think it makes me sick. My mil knows full well I tell the kids her cat phobia is irrational

When I was 6 years old I was attacked by a stray dog - still have the scars. So yes I am terrified of dogs however I try to help my kids understand there are some nice dogs. I haven’t read all the posts but I honestly find your original post ridiculous

@Nubbin

Dogs are part of ordinary life - unless you are willing to set your children up to a point they can't go to a park, walk in a wood or pass someone on a pavement with a dog on a lead this seems like huge hysteria.

being scared of ours is like being scared of a marshmallow a complete waste of emotion.

kids need to be ok with being confident around them even to call out bad behaviour or go for a run where dogs are playing.

Thank you @Nubbin this is everything I was trying to say, but you’ve articulated it so much better. Hopefully some of the other posters will understand my post a bit better.

I can understand people feeling nervous of a big man running at them, shouting, with a gun in their hand aimed forward.

But regular, well behaved people with their guns holstered and a polite demeanour. Really a problem?

Its only a cute pink gun, with the safety on and the owner has been well trained. Why would anyone be nervous of guns? Surly we should teach children that properly handled guns are not dangerous.

Dogs dont scare people, their owners scare people.

*Buttercupsandaisies

That’s the issue I have with those afraid of dogs - they pass it onto kids. It’s irresponsible.*

It IS irresponsible. That’s why I think my friend would have been better off reassuring her DD that my little dog wasn’t trying to hurt her.

I can understand people feeling nervous of a big man running at them, shouting, with a gun in their hand aimed forward.

Massive eye roll at this.

I don’t understand people who like dogs. They smell, you have to pick up their shit, and if they felt like it they could maul you. What’s to like?

Probably one of the best things I’ve read on here.

OP I’m scared of dogs. Got chased as a child and my DM is also scared off them which I’m sure rubbed off. I’ve got better as I’ve got older but yes it is a disadvantage. I work visiting people’s homes and they are often frustratingly reluctant to put their dog in another room.

Ok so my findings on this topic is that 95% MN hates dogs.

Massive eye roll at this
Because dog never bite people?

What’s a wimb?

but kids need to be ok with being confident around them even to call out bad behaviour or go for a run where dogs are playing.

Lol.....So we just tell a scared child 'well you just need to be okay with it'. What happens when they are still not ok with it despite me passing on your instruction to them? 🙄

Didn’t come on here to be called an arsehole! We can have different opinions without being rude to each other.

I think you kind of set the tone when you stated that people who were afraid of dogs were pathetic

For the record I quite like dogs, however, I don’t love them. Cats are far superior

I was attacked by two Alsations when I was 7, so although I am not afraid of them I treat them with healthy respect. DD loves dogs.

I think the main issue with dog lovers is that many of them have the "love me love my dog" attitude, and can't appreciate that not everyone loves dogs.

OP no you’re wrong. Get off your high horse. People are frightened of dogs for good reason. Keep your dog on a lead and stop it jumping up on people.

I wanted to add: the growth of the personified approach to dogs and other pets, treating them like humans or “part to the family” (again though: word peak for human family) is unfair to the animals themselves and the people these animals come in contact with.

Animals are not people. That doesn’t mean they are lot clever or complex creatures. But they are simply different. And treating them as humans makes you look like a Brit in Spain shouting English extra loud. It doesn’t make a difference.
It confuses them.

Responsible dog owners will understand that as animals dogs can be a threat and that they can cause fear and they won’t ignore that because “ah he won’t bite!”.

I once had an argument with a lady whose dog run up and took food out of my toddlers hand. Her excuse”oh he just can help himself around food”. . .

I really think there should be a test before you’re allowed to own any animal

Josico58

95 % of mn don’t hate dogs but 99.9 % think you are an idiot

@recklessruby

Over 40 years ago I was that girl. Two loose German shepherds bounded up to me and my cousin crossing a field on the way to school. We were little kids. They were barking and growling.

Literally the most tenuous comparison, and exactly what I said in my post I could understand would be scary.

That is NOTHING like how my dog is.

Ok so my findings on this topic is that 95% MN hates dogs

Dear me. I actually really like dogs and have just started walking a relatives dog twice each week because she is out of the house for 8 hours. I also have a cat. However I realise not everyone feels comfortable around dogs and cats.