Best and Worst Hen Do?

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Taking inspiration from the holidays thread. I will be a bridesmaid next year and thinking (prematurely!) about the hen do. I was just wondering what the best hen do you've been to was like, and the worst!

I'll put up my own opinion as well. Although I've only been to 3 hen parties!

Worst was my own ... I had a spa trip and afternoon tea with 4 close friends which was lovely. Then we had a lot of wine and an Ann Summers party (disaster). The rep was rubbish, didn't really want to be there and kind of squeezed us in before another party she already booked, so it was pretty rushed too. I was 22 so thought it would be a good idea but was wrong! We then went clubbing, which I dont like at the best of times, and I slept on my friend's bedroom floor.

The best I've been to was an escape room and afternoon tea at a nice hotel. A small group of friends who all knew each other so no awkward small talk. Very classy and lovely. Plus the cost was only £30 per head including contributing to the bride's. I have to admit I cringe when I see the £300+ hen weekend discussed here!

Best hen do was in Brighton (most people lived in London with about a quarter flying in from Ireland so easy access from Gatwick). We had dinner in a supper club that had live music and stayed in a budget hotel for the night. It was super chill and everyone enjoyed it. However we were all in our 30's and a few had children so it suited the bride and her friends. I'd imagine it wouldn't be ideal for a crowd of younger women that wanted a bit more debauchery.

So yes - plan your henparty for your bride and her friends rather than what you think a hen party should be.

Be mindful that most people can't afford to drop hundreds of pounds and annual leave on someone else's party.

It doesn't need to be the event of the century - just a good time with good friends.

One that was free it was dinner and drinks in a gallery
Bloody gorgeous and they did ice breakers for people to get to know each other
Was very nice and elegant

I don't think I have a worst, or at least the worst we're just run of the mill mediocre?

Best was my own! 10 of us went to Dublin for 3 nights on a budget of £100 (hotel, flights, minibus to the airport driven by poor DH to be) you can imagine what the hotel was like but we had an absolute scream!

Best : Marbella small group of girls much welcomed break from 2 under 3. It was for my best mate. I wouldn't pay that kinda money for anyone else.

Worst mine. I was hammered by 3. I really didn't want one / want to get married x

Best was a close friend's that was at another friend's house...just a bunch of people who know each other really well, good food, plenty to drink, party games, very cheap.
Worst was my ex SIL, travelled 150 miles to her home town, went out with a bunch of her friends who I'd never met. None of them bothered to speak to me (I tried) then we went clubbing (I'm not a clubber) where they proceeded to leave the club without me while I was in the loo. I was in a strange city, before the days of mobile phones, so just had to get a taxi back to her house on my own. Luckily BIL was still awake to let me in.
I think the key is think carefully about what the bride enjoys but also take into account the people who will attend, what they can afford, how easy it is to travel etc.

Best:

A weekend house party at the brides cottage. Some cool activities, lovely food and drinks and not a pub or nightclub in sight.

Weekend in the Bride’s home city, silly touristy things during the day, dinner, drinks and dancing at night. Stayed at the brides house.

Worst:

Dinner, drinks and dancing in a nightclub. The music was unbelievably loud so you couldn’t talk, I didn’t know any of the other women and none of them would dance. I eventually bailed after being bored out of my mind for 4 hours, happily the bride was too drunk to notice.

A very tacky hen night the bride clearly didn’t want. Full of very tacky hen night decorations and props and drinking games. The bride (who doesn’t really drink) looked mortified throughout. Her mother looked furious. The group of women who organised it were absolutely oblivious- they thought it was a great night.

Worst was a friend of a friend, sticky nightclub, stripper with whipped cream and the like... gah! The bride was hammered and basically showing the stripper her knockers!

I liked my hen do the best (obviously) group of 12 had a Bollywood dance workshop then dinner and cocktails. All cost under £70 each including the drinks. Home by 8pm, no hangover and I REALLY laughed all day long.

Worst was a work colleagues - pizza express then a tacky nightclub (she wanted to relive her student days). Pizza was ok but I detest nightclubs and bailed after about 2 hours and went home with a banging headache!!

Best - second part of my own. First part was afternoon tea with 12 rienda/family members at a chain restaurant. Service was appalling and subsequent complaints got as far as regional manager (who just happened to answer the phone the day I rang to find out wtf was happening and why no one was responding!!) who then gave us an afternoon tea for 4 including unlimited champagne and cocktails on him as an apology.

Part 2 was live jazz at my BiL’s family wine bar with tapas and drinks. We all put £30 in the pot and topped up as necessary. Fabulous night listening to fantastic music with great food and drinks. Everyone paid for themselves and there was no tacky decorations or behaviour!!

Think they’re the only 2 hen do’s I’ve ever been to!!

Worst was a trip to Brighton, but that was more because the people were awful! My friend and our mums ended up back at the hotel around 10!

Best was a small group at an adults weekend in Butlins. Cost about £80 for 3 nights accommodation and was just a great weekend, cheap and cheerful

Worse- friends hen do who I didn't really know very well. Dinner where she got completely drunk and was dancing on the table and falling over. Then a club. It was really boring as none of her friends wanted to dance and the hen was so drunk we kept loosing her. We all sat there with not much talking going on for most of the night in the club. The hen disappeared and was found giving some random bloke a blow job in the corridor. She was then sick on the floor of the hotel when he got home and cried that her hen do was crap.

Another terrible one, which I actually had a good time at but felt sorry for the bride to be.

From the first it was all kicking off, it wasn't organised very well and was very far away from most of the people going but close to the bridesmaid. We had to pay for 2/3 nights when some people only wanted one night and this was booked by the bridesmaid without discussion. So lots of arguments via email before the hen even took place!

All ok the first night. I had fun but went to bed early as very pregnant. But apparently the bride to be and her bridesmaid fell out and another hen got involved too. Slaps were involved. So it was extremely awkward the next morning with the brides family not talking to the bridesmaid.

The activity that day was a long way, expensive and pretty rubbish so constant moaning and slagging off the bridesmaid who organised it by bride to be s family. They didn't talk the whole day or next evening. It was awkward. Bridesmaid threatened to leave and rung her brother, brides finance in tears. It was left with bride not knowing if bridesmaid would be her bridesmaid anymore. I managed to stay out of it and had an ok time.

Best was a colleagues years ago,Blackpool pub crawl it was very fun!
Worst was my first one (I'm remarried) ,drinks in my home town centre with 2 very enthusiastic friends and 2 miserable as sin ones I spent most of the night wishing I was at home

Best was a weekend in a cottage in the grounds of a Scottish castle. Had truly spectacular weather, there was an outdoor pool, and they had done a Harry Potter theme (the bride was batty for HP) which was actually very cute and fun. The bridesmaids did all the cooking, we played some games etc. It worked because the location was stunning, it was very relaxed, and it was just a really nice group of girls.

I’ve never really been to a bad one actually! But I wouldn’t enjoy having to go abroad - too much expense and hassle for something I’m not in charge of.

Best: London - Lovely food, West End show and did the Crystal Maze live experience which was soooo much fun and great group of girls too.

Worst: My own. The company we booked hotel/activities with decided to call me the day before and tell me they'd gone into administration so no hen do and no money back - 12 of us paid £220 each
Ended up going out to the usual bars in my hometown as (understandably) no one could afford to fork out again, including me!

I organised one last May for my best friend.

I got a photo of 5 of her best friends printed onto a jigsaw, and then did a treasure hunt around our town - stopping at special places for her, like where she had her first date, where she met her husband, places she likes to go etc.

Every time she got a clue right, she got a piece of the jigsaw and when she had all the pieces, there was a message on the back about what she'd be doing for the evening.

Along the way the 5 of us had lunch in a beautiful hotel, did an escape room, played silly games along the way. Went to her house to change and then we went for a beautiful dinner.

She has a lot of friends and extended family, so we booked a function room in her favourite pub (I say pub but it's more pub/restaurant - they've won awards for their food) and had a DJ, private bar and played lots of games with about 40 people.

She loved it - the first part of the day was spent having fun with her 4 best friends, and then she got to celebrate with cousins, family, work friends etc in the evening

That's the only one I've been to :)

Recently went on a hen night to Liverpool, we did the Shiverpool Ghost walk which was awesome fun !!

Went to a Japanese themed one. All dressed up in kimonos followed by fan making and caligrapgy. Japenese food and sake.
Then a nice meal. Mind you we were all late 30s to early 40s.

Not sure about a worst one as I have not been to many but I loved mine. I meet best friend in University while studying abroad, yet she managed to find every woman who have been my “best friend” in my original citysince I was 12 (from the neighbourhood, secondary school, the scouts, the church, first job, the teaching, my first university course, etc) and get us all together for a lovely lunch out. It was very simple but I was very touched. It was such a gift to see them all again at the same time.

Best - can I say mine? Country cottage, a good walk, country pubs and a Saturday night out in our university city. My bridesmaids were fab and made up loads of games, including a version of Cards Against Humanity themed on me and DH which got a bit silly

Worst - my cousin’s, but she had a great time, it was just that I didn’t know anyone except my cousins and sister and they were into the inflatable penis sort of hen which isn’t really my scene. She only invited us because it was in London where we live, and I only attended because I get obliged! She’s lovely, we’re just into different things.

Both had remarkably similar itineraries.

Same city.
Two weeks apart.
House rental.
Evening in Friday.
Food/drink activity (cocktail and chocolate making respectively).
Lunch or dinner out Sat, and club in the evening.

One cost £135, the other £250. Neither included travel, but split petrol with friends for the cheaper one.

The more expensive one was in a horrible grotty house. They spent an hour dishing out slices of pizza at a time and lukewarm sausage rolls on the Friday. We had naff t shirts that they hadn't actually made a plan for wearing. Meal out distinctly underwhelming, and Brides mum changed her mind about covering drinks, so much more expensive. Horrible tacky club, two got so drunk we had to leave (one girl spilt the water they were over optimistically try to hand to her all over me). Bridesmaid had a shit fit at me and I ended up crying on the bride.

I was dreading the next one being so similar, but the Friday night we had pizza takeaway probably for no less than the cost of all the supermarket pizza. Games much more fun. House was beautiful. Lunch the next day tasty and reasonable. Cocktail making made for a more fun evening, and we stayed dancing in the same place.

The difference - the people!

I loved mine. Relaxed morning cupcake decorating followed by pub lunch with a few close friends and family (small wedding). I’m quite boring though!

The hen disappeared and was found giving some random bloke a blow job in the corridor. .

Bloody hell 1981m you win! I don’t think anyone can top that.

Worst was a work colleague’s hen, it was a weekend in Blackpool when I was 17, I had a very sheltered up bringing and I really had my eyes opened

I haven’t had a best one, I just avoid them now because the expectations are always too high, they cost too much and it’s just not my thing.

Best.. and wait for it. I can’t quite believe it’s coming out of my mouth... Yes, I expected to retch. No, I didn’t want to go. But it was Magaluf 🤭 cheap (cheaper than a night out in london!) out of season, but it was warm, people were friendly, the place was absolutely spotlessly clean, the beach was fabulous, the bars played 70s and 80s music and everyone was having a laugh!
Worst... champneys.