To expect my 7 year old ds ( 8 this year ).....

[Allyg1185]

To do simple things unattended like brushing his teeth, going for a shower? By unattended I mean I'm in another room and he's within earshot before anyone has a go for me not supervising him.

Everything I ask him to do seems to be a faff about. Takes forever or isn't done right. He will do these things but it's in his own sweet time. I have to still be in the bathroom when he does his teeth cause if not he gives them the quickest skirting over and out.

Just kind of thought by almost 8 he could do small tasks with me standing over the top of him.

Please tell me others this age are like this to?!

I think 7 is young to expect a child to shower alone. Again teeth I still do at 7.

Send him back to re do them again and again and again and again until hes so bored he does the properly the first time...the shower doin it im his own time i dont see a problem... u have to let jim learn these things on his owm u cant go from doing it for him to makin him do it alone but at a speed that suits u...

So many spelling mistakes. Sorry

I used to supervise night time tooth brushing at this age ,it was annoying but worth it.

Yanbu, by 7 he's old enough to be doing these things.

Our dentist said we should be brushing teeth for them until they are 8.

With us 7 to young to shower alone?

My 7 yr old DD ‘can’ do these things independently, she just sometimes chooses not to! 🙈

She showers fine, and can wash her hair. But we’ll run out of water if she’s left to her own devices as she loves it 😂🙈

Use a toothbrushing app, he’d be able to use that unsupervised. I am not at all surprised he’s taking shortcuts, that’s just what 7/8/9 year olds do.

My dentist said kids shouldn't be left unsupervised to do teeth until 11. I am (as is she) that they are perfectly capable before then, but not likely to a good job as it's pretty much of zero importance to them.

In reality we don't supervise every brush, but still most of the time.

Neither of mine showered alone until 10 ish. I would just sit in the room, chat, point out that their hair needed rinsing, they hadn't washed their feet, that kind of thing.

Mine is the same age, he can be a bit lazy but he can do a few things. He gets dressed in the morning and cleans his teeth, goes downstairs and can make toast on his own and he likes to make scrambled eggs, I prefer to watch over him. He has a bath on his own and scrubs his nails as he seems to dig everyday (I inspect them) and he washes his hair and conditions it, (on occasion I send him back in to re-rinse it). He also lays out his school clothes and does his teeth before.

At 7/8 you should still be supervising his tooth brushing and actually helping him. Most children that age simply aren't capable.

I think it's quite normal for children his age to be naturally grubby. Tbh I think lots of teenagers do the same! It's frustrating.

I'm a dentist (hence the tooth brushing comment) and I see children his age and up with really grubby mouths all the time, all the way up to 16ish! It's when parents stop doing it for them, some DC just don't do basic hygiene tasks, I think they are probably too young to recognise the importance of it and see it as mum or dad nagging.

My 7 year old son showers himself and brushes his teeth but I always check afterwards.

10 year old dd is fine herself

6 nearly 7 year old ds2 needs help with his permanent molars at the back.

12 year old ds1 is the champion of self sabotage and refuses personal hygeine to the extent of lying, pretending and generally being an arse and needs standing over.

Children need supervised toothbrushing till 11/12. Up till then they actually don't have the dexterity to do it properly or the motivation.

I hardly ever see children who brush their own teeth with clean mouths. 4 year olds have spotless teeth, but 8 year olds never do if they brush.

BlueCornishPixie
Really? I'm not saying I'm an expert at all on stuff like this- you might be, I don't know- but at 11/12 they're in secondary school, surely they should be cleaning their teeth on their own?

dragonkiller The thing is is they probably could clean their teeth on their own but they most likely won't, and many just don't have the skill. It's not like not washing where they will be smelly but fine, if their teeth aren't brushed that will cause permenant damage. I4s actually quite fiddly brushing teeth properly if you think about it, and children often haven't developed the dexterity to do it properly

It's general advice, if I had a 10 year old come in with perfectly clean teeth, no decay, no bleeding gums I wouldn't give that advice. But generally the majority of 11 year olds still need supervision.

Just to clarify I still do his teeth morning and night but I send him to have a go first. He will brush one tooth and he's off again. Even if I sit in the bathroom with him he will still just do less than the minimum. Just want him to have a decent go at it first then I will help.

With the shower I will pop in an out and remind him he needs to rinse his hair etc but again I need to be constantly at him. I need to keep an eye on him anyway cause he can use half a bottle of shower gel in one wash

I'm just trying to encourage a little bit of independance

I was having similar thoughts, with mine whos similar age. Do you still get those pink tablets that show up the bits kids have missed?

No OP my ds 10 is the same, the 5 year old DS is more way more capable and independent. I'm surprised ds10 manages to wipe his own arse most days, he needs everything else done for him or constantly reiterated to him every single day! It's wearing.

Stepson still needs supervising. He’s 14 (thankfully not in the shower) but he will cut corners everywhere. He wanted to earn money recently so I got him to clean the light switches and door handles. Said he had done it. Paid him. Then saw that he did less than half. As penalty he did them all again plus the skirts and door frames. Supervised.
Problem is, I know he will lie again and cut the next available corner.

7 is young to shower independently.

My 4 year old can pretty much shower independently, and his 8 year old sister has been doing so for a long time. YANBU

YANBU. I don’t understand why 7 is too young to shower independently.

Mine are 8 and 9. For a couple of years now they have been getting themselves up and dressed, making beds and opening curtains, getting themselves breakfast and washing/brushing their teeth.

They take it upon themselves to shower and they wash themselves properly including their hair.

I haven’t brushed their teeth since they were 5 and the dentist has always been happy with their teeth. We use electric toothbrushes so maybe that helps. I do always check them afterwards.

My 4 year old can shower independently ! Though if I want it done quickly I help and I pop in and out if he's left alone. My eldest is 7 and always showers by himself (very thoroughly). He can brush his teeth well but only if I'm there reminding him not to suck all the toothpaste off.

I'm a stickler for teeth so always do them for both of them (although the 4 year old insists on doing his first and actually does them very thoroughly)