To think that being a woman is why I was treated differently when I was unwell

[HappyShark]

NC as outing.
So I’ve been really poorly the past couple of months and it turns out I had gallstone pancreatitis; I’m actually still in hospital now after some complications with my surgery to remove the offending organ.

Anyway, I was so unwell with it... initially it was the gallstone pain which was bad enough, but then things really escalated, and for four days I was unable to eat or drink, being sick about every 40 minutes (to the point I was only bringing up stomach acid and lining).

During these four days I saw the emergency GP twice (first time given anti-emetics and told to come back if it was getting worse, second time told to take omeprazole for gastritis) and a paramedic visit (did basic obs, didn’t check eyes for jaundice, told me it wasn’t worth taking me to A&E as it would be pointless as they wouldn’t do anything), my dad eventually took me to A&E a couple of days later when I felt so bad I thought I would die, I was literally banging my head against the wall. I was still being sick constantly.

Even then, they initially checked my notes and made noises about gastritis.

Several hours later I was on a ward with a diagnosis of multiple gallstones and acute pancreatitis.

I’ve just found out a male friend of mine rang an ambulance last night with pains, and is now admitted to a ward with suspected gallstones and pancreatitis.

Am I unreasonable to suspect that one reason he was taken seriously and admitted straight away is because he’s a man?

There are many studies about women’s pain being dismissed, and being taken less seriously than men when presenting the same way. It could have been the case here, or it could have been something else. But it is a general trend.

I have also been told off for ‘not trying hard enough’ in an examination after a car accident! Unfortunately extreme pain means you usually can’t be as assertive as you’d like. And we tend to trust medical professionals.

@DontCallMeCharlotte

I didn't say they were right to think that, just that that's the subconscious preconception. Think about the language used to encourage people to not complain - man up, stop being a pussy, grow a pair. The implication being that men don't complain unless it's serious. Of course that's baloney, but that's the notion people are often exposed to from an early age.

Hi Happyshark I'm glad you're better I saw the bit where you said you were only bringing up stomach acid and lining and thought you were still bothered by that.

I think there is more to this subject than thinking women are treated worse than men. Women visit the doctors far more than men, visit the pharmacists far more and also far more likely to take sick leave. There are obviously some good reasons for
this (pregnancy etc) but some is that women are more likely to try and get help compared with men. The idea that a lot of men won't visit the doctors unless they are at deaths door isn't completely ridiculous

BBC Women 'more likely to report ill health than men

YANBU. Anyone can fall victim to misdiagnosis but medicine fails to respect or even attempt to thoroughly treat the female body. Pp saying male abdo pain = appendicitis = admission but female abdo pain = fuck knows = could be deadly but we'll just send you home without even a courtesy rummage rather sums it up, I think.

Also don't get me started on if you have anything MH related in your notes.... Got signed off once for 2 weeks with stress. Walks in to different GPs office for completely different issue 9 months later. "Ah I see you got signed off"
"Yes. One time. Work situation specific. I'm fine now."
"Oh... well it could be a symptom?"
"Of the fact I've completely changed my life since then and I'm no longer in that situation?"
Yeah Columbo, that tells me you can read. I can do that myself, I'm here for your diagnostic ability and your medical degree.

How old are you OP, if you are young, so gallstones etc is unlikely to be a problem, it might have contributed to decisions.
Do many more women than men suffer from digestive probs so it is assumed to be diverticulitis or something?

Hi Silkie I tick all the risk boxes for gallstones, I’m in my forties.

Now, I do not doubt that this is routinely the case for women, but it's never been my experience - maybe I just am lucky to have a great local hospital. Last summer I presented with a very atypical abdominal pain; acute by my standards (worse than the c-section but I could walk, though I was struggling to lift my 2yo, some d&v over the last week or so and slight fever. Doctors were baffled, but thought there was a tiny chance it might be appendicitis so referred me to surgery. Less than 24 hours later after exploratory surgery, I had a diagnosis of a condition so staggeringly unlikely to happen to someone of my age and sex that the medical student assisting my consultant OB this week actually squealed with excitement when I mentioned it.
I was never dismissed, never belittled, the doctors asked if I could be pregnant, but did not question me when I said no, they moved on to the next possibility. I'm so thankful for them all - I would have died without treatment.

Women are routinely being given nothing but paracetamol post c section. Says it all really.
To be fair, paracetamol was all I wanted post c-section, though I was offered oral morphene. I personally didn't suffer much pain. It's shit if women need more and aren't allowed it though!