...to ask why everyone has to be 'Darling'?

[PBo83]

OK, so I'm relatively new around these parts so I'm likely to be lynched. But WHY is everyone 'Darling' (DD, DH, DC, DS...etc?)

I understand the use of acronyms but why the added 'D'? Besides. it takes two seconds to type 'daughter' or 'husband' or whatever (even less for 'son' or 'kids'). From that point you can then refer to them as 'him', 'her', them or whatever so it's hardly a hardship.

I fully expect an army of pitchfork wielding Mumsnetter's to turn up at my door any minute but this unnecessary 'darling' nonsense is truly cringeworthy!

@WH1SPERS

OP here, yes, I am a man thanks for asking.

I am also a step-father who has taken on and supported my wife's daughter. I am also someone who, not having children of my own and not being naturally paternal looks for advice on how best to fulfil my role.

Thanks for your condescending remarks though. Maybe I shouldn't use this resource for advice (and a bit of banter which was kinda the point of this post).

Maybe I'll ask my mates down the boozer over a dozen pints of Stella before going home pissed and telling my missus to 'get dinner on the table love'...Does that better fit your narative?

Ah we love bants.

Ya did post in AIBU

Ah, you can dish it out but you cant take in?

AIBU isn’t your board then either.

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Gosh, well that escalated quickly.
There was no need at all for this thread to become unpleasant. It was just a discussion about the acronyms/ initialisms which many users find a bit silly, regardless of sex/ gender (I no longer know the correct terminology here!)

We have this thread every week don't we?

All that DH stuff was around long before Mumsnet surely?

I like the acronyms.

You'll be telling us next that ham isn't naice and that pears shouldn't be cutted up.

Ah I sometimes often read DH as dickhead because it is a better fit for the thread.

Yes the darling thing is cringey, particularly imo for DD and DS. Makes me think of mums who think there sprog can do no wrong.
But like has been said, the acrynom has been around yonks - doesn't stop it being cringy. But then I find "hubby" cringy IRL.

@PBo83 - I find that the acronyms make it easier and quicker to use MN - after all, it is quicker to type dd1 (7) than my eldest daughter, who's 7, or dh rather than dear husband.

It is a shorthand that most people here understand and are happy to use - but it isn't compulsory. If you don't want to use them, don't use them. If you really can't stomach even reading them, there may be more of a problem, because they are very well established here, and I doubt MN is going to change just to suit a very few posters.

Incidentally, I happen to think it is rather rude to join a forum and almost immediately start criticising the basic functioning of the site - it smacks of arrogance, I'm afraid. It looks like you are saying "I am new here but I think you are doing this all WRONG and I am going to come in and tell you why you are wrong, so you can all see the error of your ways, and start doing things properly! I don't care that this place has been working just fine the way it is, prior to MY arrival, nor that it suits the majority of its users - I don't like it and I think you are all stupid (aka users of cringey and vomit-inducing terms)".

No website/forum is going to be perfect for you unless you start it yourself and restrict its members to those who agree with you - just like no restaurant menu is ever going to be perfect, with all the dishes everyone wants on it. We have to look at the menu (or the website) and decide whether we like enough about it to want to stay, or whether we are going to go and look elsewhere for somewhere that suits us better. Nothing wrong in doing the latter, or suggesting someone does the latter - we are all different, and no website can suit us all.

I happen to think there is enough that is great about MN - the support, the humour, the work for charity (look up Woolly Hugs and see what the MN craft massive get up to), the intelligent and challenging debate on all sorts of things - that, if there are things that are less than perfect for me, I am happy to put up with them.

@GertrudeWilloughby

Omg me too I thought it was just me

Especially ExDH

Like how is he Ex and D?
Either way sounds like a dick head to me

Thanks for your condescending remarks though.

Ah, sweet irony. If you don't like it, move on padre. You've still got time to cancel the cheque.

My only real issue is the temptation to use MN abbreviations when I'm texting

I can't as it would be outing
And this is the only place I can let the crazy out

Dh is convenient shorthand it does not mean anything beyond convenience and it certainly doesn't mean you have to think of the husband or wife as a "dear". It demonstrates a very literal grumpy way of thinking to be hung up on the acronyms of this forum instead of just taking part in the conversations. Having a shared language allows for good communication acronyms are part of internet fora "language" that you quickly become accustomed to.

Im sure if you dont like it you can find other forums to you taste Hun

Oooh, thank you, DickHead fits in so many threads so much better than Darling Husband!

It's meant to be a bit of irony love.....it's just the way we are. But AIBU is a bit rich for your blood methinks.

Use it dont use it. It's up to you. Personally i never do but can see why people use them. Well apart from DDog. That one does my head in

@mbosnz

I've started reading DW as dutiful wench in a few of them too

I always type "husband". I love him enough not to save time on mentioning him ;)

Yep, it's odd and very cringy.

It is actually much quicker when using a phone with predictive text to type the whole word.

Priceless thread. Mainsplainers gotta splain...

Op, please dont be put off mn cos of some arsey comments here, sometimes mn is full of men hating arses who can't wait to jump on men posters.
I agree with you, d in front of anything has always stood for darling to me which of course is nauseating but I use it as it seems the done thing here.

If you don’t like the looks of things here, then get to stepping. Many other forums might be a better fit you.

YABU