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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Clutching the bump ?

164 replies

Blessingsdragon1 · 28/01/2019 05:31

Ok normally I do not give a fuck about the Royals but I have just seen another picture of MM clutching the bump again and it's made me irrationally annoyed. WTF is this holding her bump ALL the time about ?

OP posts:
Yerroblemom1923 · 28/01/2019 07:59

I never "flaunted" my bump and wore loose fitting maternity wear so I felt a lot of people just assumed I was fat! I only really have a couple of photos of me properly pregnant (because I felt I just looked fat) and in those (private, ie not all over Fbk etc) I am holding my bump for definition. I'm sad now I don't have more photos of my bump but at the time didn't exactly feel glowing or blooming like you're supposed to....Sad

treaclesoda · 28/01/2019 08:01

I haven't seen any photos of Meghan Markle with a bump. I feel this is probably a good thing.

But maybe she's in pain? I was in a lot of pain throughout my first pregnancy and I did rub my bump a lot because it eased the pain. Nice to know that strangers probably thought I was being ridiculous.

couchparsnip · 28/01/2019 08:02

Two things.
For some women, its a protective instinct to cradle their bump. She's being hounded every day by photographers so i imagine she's feeling quite protective.

Plus, - media bias. They are going to use that shot as it sells better.

Buddytheelf85 · 28/01/2019 08:04

I know, I honestly can’t believe the woman - thinking she can walk round touching her own stomach. The audacity. The impudence. The unmitigated gall.

NicoleNoPants · 28/01/2019 08:06

Before I had been pregnant I thought it was “attention seeking” (that phrase makes me cringe now) but when I was pregnant I enjoyed holding my bump, touching my bump etc.

Sheldonoscopy · 28/01/2019 08:06

When I was pregnant I was often touching my bump, it was a highly anxious time for me and it gave me comfort. I often felt the kicks better that way too.

I’ve recently had surgery on my stomach and I’m surprised to discover I’m doing it again despite absolutely no chance of being pregnant. So my theory is I’m protecting my painful wound.

Honestly who cares? She’s a pregnant mum to be and deserves to enjoy every moment of her pregnancy without scrutiny. Being in front of all those cameras all the time could be giving her some anxious feelings and her natural response is to touch something that brings her comfort in the same way my son strokes his soft area on his coat when his anxiety flares.

Skittlesandbeer · 28/01/2019 08:06

I remember flinching whenever I was referred to as a geriatric primagravida (which was every damn appointment, then about every 15 minutes throughout labour!).

On the bump-holding, I always notice it in films/tv. Can’t be preggers for a single moment without cradling the bump! Then later in pregnancy you have to waddle with your hands supporting your hips, and lower yourself into chairs like you’re in a limbo contest. I swear I never did either move even once. I feel like it’s what actresses who’ve never been pregnant think they have to do. Or they’re holding the cushion from slipping down Grin

Mother87 · 28/01/2019 08:07

I was a bump-clutcher/strokerBlushalways found it soothingSmilealong with resting a small plate of biscuits on said bump when sitting with feet up

treaclesoda · 28/01/2019 08:09

Attention seeking is an accusation that is always thrown at women in the public eye. I never see men described as attention seeking.

Creacaluaidhe · 28/01/2019 08:10

The Media are feeding us a ‘line’ about Meghan markle and we’re all swallowing it.
The media choose what to report, what pictures to show us. We don’t get a balanced view. She’s being bullied. They bullied Midleton until she had babies or until this one appeared and took her spot as ‘freeloader’ ‘lazy’ etc. Dunno how her marriage will survive this vitriol the newspapers throw at her.

Buddytheelf85 · 28/01/2019 08:11

I bet that if you followed any pregnant mothers you would be able to come up with similar proof that they are "flaunting" their bump all the time.

Agreed. Also isn’t the phrase ‘flaunting her bump’ vile?? I got accused of ‘flaunting’ my bump by a work colleague the other day (er, no, I’m just wearing one of the few pre-pregnancy dresses that still fits) and it really pissed me off. I think it’s because it implies that women should be concealing their offensive pregnant bodies.

whatswithtodaytoday · 28/01/2019 08:14

Skittlesandbeer Presumably you didn't have SPD? I do. Rubbing my bump/hips/back helps with the pain, I can't help but waddle, and I lower myself into chairs because it hurts.

It must be lovely to not have to do all those things.

Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 28/01/2019 08:15

I saw the videos of the coat flicking and thought it odd, but she has been holding the bump before it was even there really.

JinglingHellsBells · 28/01/2019 08:16

It drives me mad!
I hate it!

She may as well have a sign pinned on her tummy saying 'Baby in here'.

I had no views on her either way when they got married but after seeing how affected she is with this, posing and positively 'asking to be noticed' I have gone off her.

boraboring · 28/01/2019 08:18

I love seeing women holding their bumps. After recently giving birth to my first, I feel happy knowing the incredible experience they're about to have. How can you possibly be annoyed by something so petty? I don't understand people sometimes...

schnubbins · 28/01/2019 08:20

The medical term is 'Elderly Primigravida' for first time pregnancy over the age of 35.

Cheeeeislifenow · 28/01/2019 08:26

Also I never felt comfortable being pregnant, I felt overweight and miserable if she is proud of her bump then yes she should "flaunt" it, if that's even possible.
Honestly the things the media will come up with. You do know they follow her around incessantly to "catch her" doing these things to make a shit story where there was none!

BarbarianMum · 28/01/2019 08:32

Oh look another mean-minded thread. Black woman marries into British Royal family, must be punished. So transparent. Hmm

Greggers2017 · 28/01/2019 08:33

I do it all the time without even realising. Don't see why it should make some people annoyed. It's my Bump after all x

RightOh · 28/01/2019 08:34

I've been TTC for 2 years and when/if I do fall pregnant, I'm gonna hold the hell outta my bump! I'm going to rub, hold, pat, cradle and have a permanent beaming smile on my face.

Woodward12 · 28/01/2019 08:36

She's probably happy and excited to be pregnant. What a bitch eh.

Limensoda · 28/01/2019 08:37

I think it's more normal to hold your bump than not.
It's probably an instinctive maternal action and protective. No reason anyone should be annoyed by it.

Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 28/01/2019 08:37

Took 4 pages but there we go, the black commentHmm
Ffs.

MissLanesAmericanCousin · 28/01/2019 08:39

I think it's wonderful! I'm child free, but I know in my heart I would hold my stomach as much as possible. Touch is so important. I firmly believe that there are so ,many things that we have yet to understand. But I see any woman holding her baby like this as a true act of love and compassion.

I find it almost freakish for people (esp) women to be bothered by it. It's her body her choice. The amount of policing that the media and other women do on this woman's body is horrifying. I would't blame her if she caught wind, of the vociferous mob that has been harping on this, and has upped her cradling her stomach as an act of defiance. A giant FU to the assholes that are literally complaining about what she does with her hands and how she is handling her pregnancy. Her body her rules!

I hope she continues t o cradle her stomach with both hands till the very end, not just because she wants to and it feels natural, but as a giant middle finger to all those who supposedly believe in sister solidarity and all that.

People who get their hackles up so easily, when it's not even their body or pregnancy. Calling her smug and all sorts of nasty names. Those people must be very miserable people. Just heart attacks waiting to happen, as far as I'm concerned. To be up in arms over something so innocuous as a woman holding her belly. It's laughable.

However, the more I think about it, the more I think that maybe she's touching a nerve? Maybe the women in particular who are calling her smug or attention seeking are the ones who barely cradled their belly, so maybe it's making them think like they are less than. Maybe they feel a little guilt over not being as demonstrative as they could have been, so they're picking on this pregnant lady they do not even know.

Just food for thought. Either way, those that complain about how a woman, famous or not holds their pregnant belly is not someone I would want to know. It seems to come from a place of negativity, pettiness and in some cases, downright malice. And, I have no place for people who think that way in my life. I'm sure she feels the same too. I wish nothing but a safe and happy pregnancy for Duchess Megan, and for any pregnant woman who chooses to cradle their belly. And, if they don't choose to, then I wish for a happy and safe pregnancy for them too. I refuse to judge a woman or anyone on how they express or handle their own body. Whether if they slouch, stand straight as a board, talk with their hands, fidget, play with their hair etc. I will not police another human beings body, and people who do, downright spook me. It's creepy and it's nuts.

OhDearHowSadNeverMind · 28/01/2019 08:40

I had no views on her either way when they got married but after seeing how affected she is with this, posing and positively 'asking to be noticed' I have gone off her

You sound so mean and nasty that I'm sure that were MM aware of your existence she'd be delighted that you have 'gone off her'.

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