Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be worried about my sister and the face at the window.

155 replies

WhataMissMap · 27/01/2019 23:34

My sister lives in a large house at the top of a longish drive in a very quiet residential area.

She was sitting watching TV with her curtains open, this evening. She often does this as she is not overlooked by neighbours.

She happened to glance up to see a man staring at her through the window. She jumped up and he ran away.

She then saw two men running away down her road. She switched the lights off and watched from a bedroom window. The two men appeared again and stealthily walked back up her road keeping close to the hedges and started to approach her house. They must have caught sight of her in the window and they ran away.

She is really frightened, I live a few hundred miles away and obviously can’t get to her tonight. I wonder was it an attempted burglary or a peeping Tom or a silly prank. I wonder how seriously we should treat this.
She is alone with her teenage son. It’s a very low crime area.

Any thoughts would be welcome.

OP posts:
TulipsInbloom1 · 28/01/2019 07:27

Gosh how utterly terrifying!!

Gone4Good · 28/01/2019 07:34

Our drive is 1/4 mile long and we have no neighbors within screaming distance. We're extremely rural to say the least. I'm not often alone but when I am I keep my S&W .38 handy.

It's amazing how brave you feel when your armed.

Burpsandfustles · 28/01/2019 07:35

In old house we were burgled trough cat flap. Before it happened earlier when we were all awake I realise now someone threw a stone at our window. To see how we would react I suppose. We wrote it off as strange noise and didn't investigate.

AmIAWeed · 28/01/2019 07:45

Gone4good what happens when someone does break in?! Are you in the UK?
In the UK anyone with a shotgun or firearms needs to store ammunition and guns in a different locked cabinet.
Can you really claim you were broken into and had time to access both and load? If not you'll be the one getting into trouble.
I genuinely believe and was broken into 5 times in my first home that the best thing you can do is put up clear deterrents. If someone is determined to get in, sadly they will. Lock yourself and whomever else is with you in a room. Call the police. items can be replaced via insurance, people can't

Oysterbabe · 28/01/2019 07:46

Absolutely terrifying.
I have a friend who woke up in the night to find a robber in his house. He wrestled him to the ground and kept him pinned until the police arrived. My friend was completely naked at the time so a bit awkward for everyone.

Tellem2 · 28/01/2019 07:49

Does she have curtains or blinds, far too many homes leave everything out on display in these residential areas. And Police ASAP

notWORKzilla · 28/01/2019 07:58

Morning OP.
I hope you and your sister got some rest in the end?

WhatchaMaCalllit · 28/01/2019 07:59

If I were your sister, I'd be looking in to getting a good surveillance system installed. One where outside lights go on when there is movement and that can record that movement (be it wild animals or strangers looking in her window).

DayCareCase · 28/01/2019 08:12

I live in London and had this but a bit further, two men standing on my windowsill feeling for gaps and looking in the letterbox. Going to the back, trying doors. I was shit scared and rang 999 and they told me as the men were t proving successful they wouldn’t send a car! Sounds crazy typing that, but they were disinterested.

PeridotCricket · 28/01/2019 08:12

My sister lives in a very safe small town. Burglars hit about 10 properties over a weekend. They were away. Worked out that a transit had been in the area earlier offering to do dad jobs and casing the houses. Known to police.

Better locks, light that come on automatically all now been fitted.

ClarabellaCTL · 28/01/2019 08:28

That's bloody terrifying, I would have been shitting myself. We live in quite a big house that is on its own. My DH works away a lot so it's often just me and my boys. I'd really like a dog ( a big one!) but my DH really doesn't like dogs :( The back of our house is mostly glass, no curtains to shut. To be honest at night I try not to look out the back!

CantWaitToRetire · 28/01/2019 08:37

I'd recommend CCTV that connects to an app on your phone or tablet so your DS can very quickly look at the live view and check what's going on outside. She should have cameras all around the front/sides/back of the house, not just at the front.

MissedTheBoatAgain · 28/01/2019 08:37

Sounds like an attempted robbery. Not to surprised at them returning.

I had same a few years ago. Heard the alarm on my car squeak as thieves attempted to disable the car. They ran away when I opened the curtains.

Police came and installed one of their own wheel clamps. Thieves attempted to get that off too! Young boy aged 14 wearing surgical gloves was caught.

Never did find out what action, if any, was taken. Insurers paid for damage to be repaired, but I lost NCB even though police had caught the thief.

Grace212 · 28/01/2019 10:11

I would definitely tell the neighbours - they can all keep an eye out.

if the drive is very long, does that mean it's hard for opposite neighbours to see each other?

IdleBetty · 28/01/2019 10:17

stormy night where she is and so I hope that puts the men off staying around.

Burglars love stormy/windy weather, it disguises the noise of smashing glass. I am even more alert when the weather is bad.

MonicaGB · 28/01/2019 11:16

The owl thing is true. They use it to communicate to each other. In my old house I was hearing owls quite frequently one week, they appeared to be calling back and forth to each other. At one point it seemed like the owl was in next doors garden so I opened the patio doors and recorded the sound.

Later on I spoke to another neighbour who said she had had someone in her garden trying to get in. She commented on the owl noises and the police confirm they use it to communicate to each other. The burglars were probably put off of my house as they could hear that I was in and had locked the doors thoroughly.

I'm not massively suspicious of owls, which is not great as I now live near a wood. But the calling is slightly different and any response is not quite so immediate. Or the burglars were in that area too. Who knows?

SpringForEver · 28/01/2019 11:29

Just to remind those of you with dogs or are thinking of getting one as a deterrent that burglars often take the dog or injure/kill them. They also take cats. Anything they can sell on or use as dog bait.

Scum.

Grace212 · 28/01/2019 13:16

oh dear re owls

so much for dreaming of living in a nice place where owls can be heard!

HeebieJeebies456 · 28/01/2019 14:19

I would have thought that the curtains being open would have put a burglar off and not attracted one
Really? Shock
She had the curtains open and lights blazing, giving would-be burglars full view of the layout of her room, all her gadgets and showed them she was allegedly on her own in the property.....and you think that would deter burglars?! Hmm

As well as putting up real security measures outside your sister also needs to use her common sense and shut her curtains when the lights are on and/or invest in window blinds....or even use one way privacy film on her windows if she doesn't want to use blinds.
Putting yourself and your home on display like that increases your chances of getting burgled.

Idontbelieveinthemoon · 28/01/2019 15:56

We have the Ring doorbell and cameras dotted about and it is genuinely brilliant kit; it connects to my phone via an app, alerts me on my apple watch and I love that I can speak through them and shout "who's that trip trapping over my bridge" at the DC when they return home.

It's not cheap but in terms of safety and security it's absolutely worth it.

Original poster
WhataMissMap · 28/01/2019 16:15

She only had one small window uncurtained. All her other windows were covered. It is impossible to see into her house without walking up the drive.
She will be drawing the curtains on even the small window this evening.

My DH has fixed her CCTV and the security lights. My DS has had a word with her neighbours. She has warned the carers for the elderly lady next door to be extra vigilant. My DS is particularly concerned for the lady who visits last at about 10.30 pm. The police have been informed too about this.
Thank you for all your comments, they have been helpful. I shall never relish hearing owl calls ever again though!(joke)

OP posts:
Grace212 · 28/01/2019 16:18

@Idontbelieveinthemoon

I was thinking the Ring doorbell looks good - I wonder if it actually puts off the sort who rings the doorbell to check who is around etc.

thedancingbear · 28/01/2019 16:25

^Our drive is 1/4 mile long and we have no neighbors within screaming distance. We're extremely rural to say the least. I'm not often alone but when I am I keep my S&W .38 handy.

It's amazing how brave you feel when your armed.^

is that you, Oscar?

Gone4Good · 28/01/2019 17:19

Gone4good what happens when someone does break in?! Are you in the UK?
In the UK anyone with a shotgun or firearms needs to store ammunition and guns in a different locked cabinet.

Sorry I should have mentioned I'm in the U.S. and my .38 is a handgun which fits in my pocket. No rules about keeping guns and ammo separate, or in a locked safe. That would render them useless for self-defense. In our state you can walk about in public like a gunslinger with a side arm if you wish. (Proper permit needed).

If someone entered my home uninvited I'd order them to leave, if they didn't I'd shoot them. I obviously wouldn't shoot someone unless my life was in danger. Isolated homes here are very safe because the baddies know they can be shot dead by the property owners. We have the right to defend ourselves here and it keeps rural homes/farms safer.

Hollyhobbi · 29/01/2019 01:50

I was at a neighbourhood watch meeting last week and most break ins happen between 5 and 11pm when the house is unoccupied. And Winter is a robber's favourite season due to the dark evenings and bad weather.