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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think I am being forced out of midwifery?

307 replies

ThisMustBeMyDream · 27/01/2019 00:39

I've been a midwife for 12 years. I have a wealth of experience and skills.
But I am also a single parent (not through choice).
I have no family support. Ex husband doesn't involve himself with the children.
I'm in so much debt from paying for a Nanny so I can keep on working.
I can't do it anymore.
Work won't help.
I feel absolutely lost and distraught that for 12 years, I have fought hard to make this work (I was a teenage mum when I started my training). And now I can feel it slipping out of my fingers.
All I wanted was to work as a community midwife so I can use regular childcare. But no, this can not be accomodated due to the government deciding 80% of women should have continuity of carer (Better Births recommendation, which was then used in the NHS Long Term Plan). The traditional community model is going to go to a caseloading model which involves community days, along side hospital shift work. My employer has stated even if I could do the caseloading model, I can not stay part time either (I am currently part time as I have 3 children to manage, and one has additional needs).
These changes are allegedly happening in all Trusts as a result.
I'm going to lose my career. What the hell am I going to do?

OP posts:
Oldstyle · 27/01/2019 00:43

No expertise, no advice. Just wanted to say how very sorry I am. Any opportunities in the context of the natural birth movement - or a specialist role working with refugee women? Education? Mentoring? You are clearly passionate about what you do, it would be so tragic if you were unable to use those skills and that experience & knowledge.
Flowers

AornisHades · 27/01/2019 00:44

I hate to say it but could you transfer to the private sector? Or teaching?

Original poster
ThisMustBeMyDream · 27/01/2019 00:53

Private work (so one to one etc) is a caseloading model too.
Specialist roles oftem seem to involve some shift work too. For example we have an infant feeding midwife, IT midwives, berevement midwife, smoking cessation midwife, and all these roles were forced to do a long shift each week due to financial pressures. There doesn't seem to be a safe way of working unless you have family (or no kids).
As for teaching, I honestly don't think I could. I have a strong teaching background in my family, and I don't feel confident enough to teach midwifery. Plus it would mean doing more qualifications (which I already lack the time for!).
I feel this is an incredibly short sighted plan (and not a stable long term plan at all!).

OP posts:
rainflowerstar · 27/01/2019 00:53

Can you take a career break until the children are old enough to look after themselves?

Original poster
ThisMustBeMyDream · 27/01/2019 01:06

Career break wouldn't be long enough as the little ones are 6 and 3. As a midwife, you have to do 450 hours every 3 years (plus some other requirements) to keep your registration. If you dont, it involves a return to practice course, which is unpaid, and takes a year. There aren't many courses either. My nearest is 25 miles away. Plus I believe it costs £9,250.

OP posts:
kateclarke · 27/01/2019 01:28

Would you be interested in training as a health visitor?

PyongyangKipperbang · 27/01/2019 01:37

I think you need to take this up with your union. What they are doing is basically forcing you to quit because you have children and they are refusing to consider family friendly working. This puts them on very very thin ice, and I wonder if the person who told you that you cannot stay part time has had any official guidance on that because its not ok for them to say that.

Get in touch with your union for advice and start a paper trail so that every enquiry you make or conversation had is documented.

Snugglepumpkin · 27/01/2019 01:38

Approach whichever agencies deal with midwifery & nursing & have a chat with then about how much work they could get you, making it clear you are only looking for part time or whatever.
My SIL is a midwife, all I ever hear is about the massive shortage of midwives, so there must be some demand for temp placements about.

SophiaLovesSummer · 27/01/2019 01:40

It's just shit isn't it? I had a career I loved (and trained hard for) in the public sector but in the end had no choice but to jack it in Sad I still think of all the people I could mabye have helped, it kills me a bit if honest but I literally ended up with no choice.

Whereabouts are you? If near Central London could you do agency shift work, there are more private maternity units here than I think anywhere else in the country. Failing that, New Zealand and Oz are likely to want you - I had 2 colleagues leave my old job to emigrate and do the same job there (but better paid and more appreciated!)

FortunesFave · 27/01/2019 05:56

So they're just getting rid of community midwives??? I'm sorry but that's AWFUL! I'm so sorry OP....do you live in the sort of area where people would hire a doula? You could consider that?

Bamchic · 27/01/2019 06:18

We have bank midwives at our trust, could you look at that? You’d only need to do one aprox 1 long day a month to keep your registration! Then you could go back to midwifery later?
Or you could look at health visiting or perinatal mental health?

Roguebludger · 27/01/2019 06:20

Similar here, 14 yrs in a public sector career I loved and going to have to Jack it in because I had a family. The cuts have meant there aren't the family friendly roles that you can do for a few years until the children are old enough for me to go back to shifts. It sucks op it's destroyed me too.

Itssosunnyout · 27/01/2019 06:20

I gave birth last September and saw on Facebook that midwife has also trained on giving lip fillers. She's an excellent midwife but she's making provisions to top up her income or leave.
I can see why people leave the profession of there is no flexible working

7forwardorsplit · 27/01/2019 06:26

Same issue here op, it’s rubbish isn’t it? My worry is less childcare but more having to do fifty percent hospital care that I find really stressful and draining. I’m considering training to be a health visitor, don’t know if that’s something you’d consider?

MoaningSickness · 27/01/2019 06:27

While I feel for you on an individual basis, I can't help feeling that continuity of carer is best for the women actually giving birth.

Some jobs just can't work on regular hours.

pullthecracker · 27/01/2019 07:00

In our trust we are trying to work out a strategy for continuity, but we as community midwives will just continue our normal roles whilst delivery suite midwives will form teams with us and meet the women antenatally, we have refused to caseload, midwives have lives too.
They can’t force you to go full time surely? Have a look at neighbouring trusts to you, we aren’t all doing the same and it might be that somewhere else has something that will work for you.

Mummyoflittledragon · 27/01/2019 07:03

MoaningSickness

All very well to say. But that will probably lead to more shortages and still no continuity of care.

This again sounds like a scheme cooked up by people, who have no concept of what it is like to be a parent with no back up care.

I have no advice really. Perhaps you could look into being an independent midwife when your children are older. I also think talking to your union would be a good idea. You are effectively being forced out.

user1471426142 · 27/01/2019 07:16

I do think it’s bonkers to expect full continuity however nice that would be. I’m pregnant at the moment and have had the same community midwife throughout which is good as she now knows me well. She has small children and presumably the shifts she’s doing work well for her. Even if she did a few hospital shifts in addition, the chances of her being on duty when I go into labour are small. I’m just not convinced it is a realistic expectation for most women to have.

MaverickSnoopy · 27/01/2019 07:16

Whilst continuity of care is best for women, actually a midwife full stop is best for women. Surely lack of continuity of care is predominantly caused by the midwife shortages and implementing a system like this is only going to worsen it as more people leave who are in the same boat as you.

I've had 3 babies and what was most important to me (although I appreciate others will feel differently) was continuity of information and the same 2 or 3 midwives. I didn't expect to see the same person on delivery nor did I care. My first delivery was 23 hours long and I had 3 different midwives during that time due to shift changes. I was in too much pain to worry about it and was grateful that each one of them was there, they each brought something to the table so to speak.

There's a bigger picture here. I agree speak to your union.

Dreamingofkfc · 27/01/2019 07:17

I'm not sure how quickly these plans will be implemented -. I'm on maternity leave but I think my trust have put the COC model on hold ATM. It's going to be challenging to sort I believe. However it will be the best for the women if done right and I think it could give you more flexibility.

underneaththeash · 27/01/2019 07:29

How old are your children OP? If they're school age, the one long shift could be managed by an au pair, who would have compensatory time off the other days.

I have to say though, that its possible that a blanket ban on part-time working may be considered indirect sexual discrimination and I'd call ACAS and ask for their advice.

anniehm · 27/01/2019 07:51

How about an au pair? Your youngest is entitled to 30 hours free childcare if you are working so an au pair would work hours wise to collect the kids, feed them etc if you do 3 12 hour days like they do here (she/he then gets 4 days off). You would need a spare room but pay is far less than a nanny

bastardkitty · 27/01/2019 07:55

I agree they are on very thin ice re part-time working. Don't do anything rash. Have they issue 90 day notice in writing? Please do talk to your union - or join if you're not in one.

NicoAndTheNiners · 27/01/2019 08:00

Any other trusts within commuting distance who have a different model of working?

Where I work there are some normal community midwives and some doing the COC model. Also the specialist midwives don't work clinically. Also you'd be allowed to work part time.

Anything else in the hospital you can do.......infection control role, blood transfusion, etc? Keep an eye out on nhs jobs locally not just for midwives jobs.

Bank is a possibility. I know a midwife who's kept her registration by running private antenatal group courses. She's always fully booked and makes quite a bit of money from this.

Divgirl2 · 27/01/2019 08:11

I second the au pair idea (if you have space) plus nursery during the day so the au pair isn't doing too many hours. Or training as a health visitor/sonographer.
Or could you move to Scotland/Wales? I think these changes only affect England for now.