Act of kindness - who's BU?

[longlucie]

I really don't think I'm wrong here, but will accept it if I am!!
Laddo's school are being inspected this week. I've worked in schools during inspections (3, or maybe 4, at different schools) and I know what a horrible, nerve-wracking time it is for the staff, no matter how experienced or competent they are. So I took in some biscuits for the staffroom this morning when I dropped laddo off, as a little treat and morale booster. My husband thinks it was a ridiculous thing to do and totally unnecessary, because teaching is their profession and inspections are just part of that. Who's right?!!
If it makes a difference, it's a small primary school.

Heaven forbid you should show a little bit of empathy and caring to someone who is 'just doing their job', huh?! I used to do the same thing with our school.

It doesn't hurt anybody, does it? And I'm sure it'll put a smile on a couple of dials. Good on you OP!

It may be part of the job but it’s an awful part of the job. What a kind thing for you to do

Inspections are part of teaching, but I think it was a nice gesture on your part. Presumably your husband has never had someone 'inspecting' his performance at work?

Very kind thing for you to do, OP! Everyone loves a biccie!

It's a nice gesture at a stressful time. Is your DH always so.unsympathetic?

I did the same when my child’s school had ofsted in. Yes inspections are par for the course but that doesn’t mean you can’t show a little kindness.

Why does this affect your husband so much? God forbid you do something nice..

It’s a nice thing to do.

Ignore your husband. He obviously wouldn’t like it if someone gave him a nice gesture for ‘just doing his job’.

I didn’t realise they found d inspections so stressful. Regardless everyone loves biscuits.

that's a lovely thing to do, OP.

It is a really nice thing to do and I'm sure the teachers appreciate it.

Were they His Special Biscuits? Is that you Amy Farrah Fowler?

You did a lovely thing.

Am I the first to give a YABU for the use of 'laddo'?

But not U overall. Inspections are ridiculous (well, actually, what I hear from Ofsted/Estyn is that the LAs are behind half the problems, setting ridiculous expectations and standards outside the legal norms, but that's a different argument).

What does your husband do?

And how would he feel if someone gave his workplace a gift to say "Thank you" or similar? I'm pretty sure he'd be eating a biscuit, and not bitching about how stupid it was that someone gave them a tin of cookies.

He has an issue over a few biscuits? That's bizarre.

Were they his biscuits....

It's not necessary, he's right, but it is a nice thing to do. Nice things aren't normally necessary, it doesn't mean you can't do them though.

That sounds like a lovely thing to do.

Is it a woman thing do you think? I’ve frequently given little gifts as thank you gestures, when I’ve been in hospital for eg. Yes people are just doing their jobs’ but the fact that they’ve done it well and made your life just a little bit more bearable means a lot. I’ve never seen my dad or XH do this though, it just wouldn’t cross their mind. I’ve seen my mum take in chocolates or a card on behalf of my dad, and I’ve done it on behalf of XH, but it was instigated by me. I’ve also seen my (female) DP’s brother saying exactly the same thing as OP’s DH about the care home where their father passed away, so maybe it’s a thing women feel compelled to do more than men.

What a nice thing to do. Did he get out of the wrong side of the bed?

Ahem... is it really likely that you’ll get a chorus of disapproval for giving hard-working people surprise biscuits? Maybe the better AIBU would be ‘am I being a bit OTT’, but it can’t really be wrong, can it.

Feels a bit virtue signalling to post about it, but looks like I’m in the minority.

Hubby darling is a prick. Does he refuse to tip waitstaff too?

That's a lovely thing to do, and I'm sure the staff appreciate it. He is BU.

You're right. Your husband sounds a bit unkind. Has he ever lived through a statutory inspection? I experienced an Ofsted inspection in a past job and a full CQC inspection in this one and they were really, really tough- as you well know! I think you did a very nice thing.

Nice thing to do. Random stuff like that helps.
I used to work in software and when we released a new version I used to bring in cake or similar for the team.
Little gestures can mean a lot.

How is it any skin off your husband's custard? It's a nice gesture and helps the staff to feel like someone else understands what they're going through.