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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shocked at boss telling me off for being late back

469 replies

onlyafewdaystogo · 23/01/2019 11:10

I am retiring from work next Wed, after many years working for this company. Last year our dept got a new Manager who's a bit of a stickler.

Anyhow, due to upcoming retirement several groups of colleagues have been taking me out for lunch in the last few days. Yesterday I went to an Italian restaurant with some people from another Dept that I have a lot of dealings with.

We had a lovely relaxing lunch and I got back to work at 3 o'clock instead of 2.30. My boss knew this group were taking me out. He called me into his office about an hour later and told me off for being late back from lunch and said it's the second time it's happened in recent days and I'd have to watch my timekeeping.

AIBU to be Shock. It's always been the norm when someone is retiring that they spend the last week or so winding down and not really being bound by the normal time bands etc.

My colleagues were really surprised and annoyed when they heard.

OP posts:
LagunaBubbles · 23/01/2019 13:54

She is employed and there was work to do

Echt she is employed but it is the norm in her company to wind down, what work was there for her to do? You sound jealous that she is clearly in a profession where she can do this.

dancinginthehall · 23/01/2019 13:58

Echt why do you keep insisting that there was work to do when the OP has said she isn't involved in any current work, just tidying her desk?

hellsbellsmelons · 23/01/2019 13:58

echt It's not highlighted on my PC either.
Very odd.
Maybe a slight namechange?

Puzzledandpissedoff · 23/01/2019 13:58

The other Dept do not report to my manager, they report to a different manager who was at the lunch with us

Ah - that makes a difference then. As said, it was all the colleagues' extra time off I was thinking about, but since their boss was there and (presumably?) didn't mind, you're all good

Have you done a NC by the way? Only that last post wasn't "highlighted" as OP posts normally are ...

echt · 23/01/2019 13:58

Echt she is employed but it is the norm in her company to wind down, what work was there for her to do?

Not a get out of jail free card form the work premises.

You sound jealous that she is clearly in a profession where she can do this

What makes you think I can't?

gamerwidow · 23/01/2019 13:59

Bluelady

Yes it is bloody hard because I can't just say to staff your manager is wrong.
I have to go back to the manager every time, remind them that we are an organisation that works flexibly and who values actual work performance instead of 'presenteeism'. Ask them to look at the situation again and see if there is a way we can manage it differently next time. Ask why they implemented that rule, is there an issue I don't know about, can I help resolve the issue so we don't need the rule etc.
I've also sent them on every management training course I can find but they still treat their staff like children. I've had to refer it up to my manager now because I'm not sure what else to do. They just don't get it.

AldiLidlDeeDee · 23/01/2019 13:59

Sounds like the new manager is very inexperienced and has a lot to learn about managing staff to get the best out of them.
Still thinks being bullish is the way to go, hopefully, he'll learn...

echt · 23/01/2019 14:00

echt It's not highlighted on my PC either. Very odd.Maybe a slight namechange?

It's come back on. MN, eh? :o

Original poster
onlyafewdaystogo · 23/01/2019 14:02

Yes, I invented this name to match the thread title, then changed back to my usual name to post on another thread, then changed back to answer Echt's queries but used a small instead of a capital letter for 'only'.

Apologies.

OP posts:
Last2Know · 23/01/2019 14:02

Yes YABU, you’re still getting paid to do your job and contacted hours, you shouldn’t be just coming back when you fancy

This, and I assume your lunch companions are also strolling in half hour late. So you are being disruptive. Can't you do anything after work?

Puzzledandpissedoff · 23/01/2019 14:03

Just noticed, for those of us wondering ... the first letter of OP's name was a capital in the first post, but lower case in her later one

Puzzledandpissedoff · 23/01/2019 14:03

Ah - cross posted with you, OP Grin

Flooffloof · 23/01/2019 14:04

Omg! What a bloody muppet .... ask him if he wants to put a discipline procedure in place ... agree to a meeting and then ... turn up late

This but make it for the day after you leave.
I was once told I had to learn a thing (a spreadsheet thing) on my last day in a job. I found it hilarious actually. I ended up saying ok then you just tell me again, and again, and again. I wasted about 2 hours of this woman's time. To then wave byebye. So funny

Butterfly84 · 23/01/2019 14:05

Yes YABU, you’re still getting paid to do your job and contacted hours, you shouldn’t be just coming back when you fancy

Yep, 100% agree. You are being paid to do a job. I would never have the nerve to do what you did.

Waveysnail · 23/01/2019 14:05

You still have work to do and being paid to do that work. If you want extra long lunches then you make up the time or don't get paid.

percypeppers · 23/01/2019 14:05

echt you are completely on another planet and have clearly done nothing else but teach.

slashlover · 23/01/2019 14:06

Have to laugh at the people posting about how the rules should be adhered to, no slacking etc while obviously being on MN during work time !!

Because everyone works 9-5 Mon - Fri, and there are no SAHMs on this board.

Bluelady · 23/01/2019 14:07

@gamerwidow, you'd think they'd learn by example, wouldn't you? I learnt a huge amount from the best manager I ever had, equally I learnt a lot about how not to manage people from some absolutely dreadful ones.

Auntiepatricia · 23/01/2019 14:08

Congrats on your retirement, just smile and say sorry. Then do what you like if you don’t mind posing off that manager or toe the line a bit more if you prefer not to get a dig in. I probably do the second but still enjoy myself, and take it very very easy for the last few days!

ItsMEhooray · 23/01/2019 14:11

I wouldn't have said anything if I were that manager but it's probably more about other people than you. Can't blame him for not wanting the whole team to come in late and if they get away with it regularly over this fortnight he might think they might just keep doing it when you're going. He just sounds inexperienced really.

echt · 23/01/2019 14:12

echt you are completely on another planet and have clearly done nothing else but teach

Not sure what your point is here. Do explain. With examples.

dancinginthehall · 23/01/2019 14:13

You're being ridiculous Butterfly. There is no 'nerve' involved in telling your Manager that you've been invited out to a lunch to mark your retirement but an adjacent Dept and then coming back half an hour after the normal time - when you have already completed all of your work, have no handover to do, and are just tidying your desk.

Also, the Manager of the other Dept was there so presumably some, if not most, Managers consider this normal practise.

AGHHHH · 23/01/2019 14:13

@percypeppers, to the front of the class!

echt · 23/01/2019 14:13

Have to laugh at the people posting about how the rules should be adhered to, no slacking etc while obviously being on MN during work time !!

In Australia. The evening. On school holidays, actually.

It's part of The Wonder Of The Internet. Kind of thing.

gamerwidow · 23/01/2019 14:15

@BlueLady you would think that! I've also had some awful managers over the years and some very good ones. I've taken something from all of them but also from my own experience because I've made plenty of mistakes along the way too!
Being a good manager is a skill that has to be learnt so I am happy to guide them but it's frustrating to see them keep making the same mistakes.