Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

That my friend is annoyed that an ambulance was called for me...

248 replies

ClothesHangingOnTheFloor · 21/01/2019 23:00

I had a bad asthma attack in the middle of the night - lasted over an hour, my partner dialled 111 but they immediately issued an ambulance that arrived within five minutes. (Friday night).

I had low oxygen (blue lips), high heart rate, high BP and I couldn't speak a word, just continuous panicky cough and loud wheeze in between coughing . I was put on the nebuliser, and within 20 minutes I was coming out of it, could speak and was extremely grateful that I didn't have to go to the hospital (unless I wanted to ...I didn't). The only lasting effects were sore back muscles and raw throat from coughing, and advice to see GP to review meds.

The paramedics were excellent, and even said that if my symptoms returned then to call 999 again.

The last attack I had this bad was over four years ago, and I didn't call an ambulance, my friend/neighbour drove me and her husband stayed with my kids.

So...I was telling my friend this, and she implied I was a time waster because I never even ended up in hospital..."ambulances are for people who need to go to hospital". No amount of telling her that I didn't call the ambulance will convince her.

So... Am I being unreasonable to think that if you can be treated at home successfully by a paramedic, in an emergency situation, then what is the issue?

OP posts:
Mishappening · 22/01/2019 09:13

Ignore your silly friend.

People die in severe asthma attacks and you needed the help that the para-medics were able to give. Glad that you are better.

PinaColada1 · 22/01/2019 09:14

I’ve friends with asthma and they are all told, don’t muck around if you are having a severe attack or go blue. Don’t take chances.

Your friend needs educating about asthma, what if she was with you and didn’t call an ambulance?

UbbesPonytail · 22/01/2019 09:14

YANBU. My sister died of an asthma attack in an ambulance. She only had a chance because she was with the paramedics and I’ll be forever grateful that she had least had a chance because she was with them.

Every asthma attack is life-threatening. I’m so glad you got the help you needed. Your friend is very ignorant. Paramedics take call outs to asthma attacks very seriously.

PinaColada1 · 22/01/2019 09:16

I’m so sorry @ubbes

labazsisgoingmad · 22/01/2019 09:18

things like asthma can escalate quickly so you did right to call an ambulance. the fact the paramedics stabilized you is irrelevant

Bluelonerose · 22/01/2019 09:23

Op you absolutely did the right thing. Ds2 has asthma and it's so scary.
One of the nurses told me 10 puffs on his blue inhaler is the same as a nebulizer and to try that next time.
It's worked for us so far but obviously speak to your Dr before you try it just in case.

artisanscotcheggs · 22/01/2019 09:23

Tell her to fuck off.

Aworldofmyown · 22/01/2019 09:24

Your friendly is sadly one of the many people ignorant about the seriousness of Asthma.

That said - I had no idea how serious it can be until my son was diagnosed. So I would tell her she's wrong, ask if she would like you to explain the reasons why she is wrong. If not don't take it personally and move on. You have the condition and you know what you should be doing.

PlumpSyrianHamster · 22/01/2019 09:25

Your friend is a stupid twat.

TimeIhadaNameChange · 22/01/2019 09:26

Lots of people don't understand asthma. They think it's a bit of wheezing, probably because you're unfit. They don't realise it can be deadly.

I was diagnosed at 11. A few years ago I got into a 'discussion' with my mother, who's never taken it seriously, about a friend's daughter, who has eczema. My mum was showing more sympathy for her than she's ever shown for me. Slightly annoyed, I remarked that I'd rather have eczema than asthma, to which there was a pause then a 'I don't know...' from her, at which point I remarked that, as terrible as eczema is, sufferers don't tend to die from it.* She STILL wasn't convinced asthma wasn't the better option!

Of course, now my sister and her have been diagnosed with it it's a terrible condition to have!

(* - I know eczema is a horrible thing to have, and there has been the odd death related to the condition, but I really don't think they're comparable in that regard.)

@UbbesPonytail - I am so sorry to hear that.

Meangirls36 · 22/01/2019 09:31

Tell her to fuck off. She's not your friend and I hope shes not in charge of anyone else who needs medical attention ever. The only person who can decide if you need an ambulance is the 999 responder who are also highly trained. Just because some random thinks something doesn't mean you ever have to listen. People just like having opinions and power. Small pathetic people who have no power in their life's and like to use what little they have on other people. Don't tell her about your medical condition ever and don't class her as a friend. Also ambulances don't waste money. They normally help hospitals in not bringing patients who dont need it.

Cath2907 · 22/01/2019 09:34

My cousin died from an asthma attack - your friend is nuts.

Onwardsagain · 22/01/2019 09:48

Your friend is a fucking idiot 🙈

Oxygenation is literally the most important thing to human survival and asthma attacks can be hugely unpredictable. I've known two people in real life die from them and many more either pass away or be in a peri arrest/ cardiac arrest situation by the time they've reached a&e . It's one of those things that you just do not take chances with. Please ignore her and her stupidity and never let it influence the help you seek in the future.

Belenus · 22/01/2019 09:48

You were right. Your friend is dangerously ignorant. For two years I was a call operator for an OOH service. Yours would have been one of those "FFS, you should have dialled 999, your lips are blue" calls. That's what we'd have thought, not said, obviously. We'd have called 999 for you.

Paramedics are the first response and they're fast. They treat and assess. If their treatment is all you need, great, they've saved your life without you needing to go to hospital. And if you do need the hospital, they're best placed to get you there at speed and to be able to treat you on the way if need be.

Raven88 · 22/01/2019 09:59

111 sent the ambulance not you, and by the sounds of it you needed them. Your friend sounds ignorant. If I was with someone in your condition I would of called an ambulance. My thinking is if your not breathing properly you need urgent help incase it escalates.

theAntsareMyFriends · 22/01/2019 09:59

You are right. We've been told to always call 999 when DS has an attack. By getting prompt treatment for a condition that can and will get worse you are saving NHS resources. If you wait until it is extremely serious you will need more time and resources to recover.

There seems to be a weird illness competition. People seem to love comparing their conditions and there is sometimes a strange bit of jealousy towards the really ill. Your friend sound like one of those people who are healthy but are jealous of the attention an ill person gets. When you or your child have breathing problems you know that the fuss that gets made over you never makes up for the fear that you feel during and after an attack.

OP I hope you feel better and don't have a reoccurred anytime soon.

FuzzyShadowChatter · 22/01/2019 10:03

I'm glad you're feeling better. Your 'friend' sounds a bit heartless. An ambulance is for emergency medical needs - not all of those needs require a hospital when the paramedics have the training and equipment to give that care. I've had the ambulance out for things that thankfully didn't require the hospital - from things related to my disabilities to my second child's sudden arrival in which the maternity unit sent one out to attend while midwives came out - and I'd be pretty pissed if someone I considered a friend thought any of those were a waste of time. It may not have resulted in going to hospital, but all of those could have been much worse without paramedics.

AwakeNow · 22/01/2019 10:11

Your friend must not really understand about ambulances and what paramedics do. I watched them repeatedly get my neighbours heart going one time on his door step. They are not just drivers with an oxygen mask. Then there are the ones with the equipment for exactly your athma attack, you and may have soon been unconsious! They may very well have save your life.
When taking a St Johns course they said to specifically ask for paramedics, not just an ambulance in critical emergencies, as the non paramedic type didn't all have paddles to start a heart. Respitory and cardiac would fall under that. They can begin working on you, and are highly trained, not just a taxi service. This was 20 yrs ago so not sure of how it is today.

hatethinkingofusernames · 22/01/2019 10:12

In the UK 3 people die a day from an asthma attack. You 100% did the right thing

hatethinkingofusernames · 22/01/2019 10:12

Hope you're feeling better x

Sexnotgender · 22/01/2019 10:12

Is your friend mentally deficient in some way?

Asthma is incredibly serious and you did exactly the right thing. Glad you’re feeling better, that must have been terrifying.

nuttybutter · 22/01/2019 10:12

Your friend isn't a friend

AwakeNow · 22/01/2019 10:18

I'm glad they helped you, that must have felt awful. I hope feel better soon. Had you had a nebulizer ever before?

newnameforthis7 · 22/01/2019 10:20

Glad you're OK OP.

newnameforthis7 · 22/01/2019 10:20

@ClothesHangingOnTheFloor

Another thing to remember and think about, and something your 'FRIEND' needs to hear, is that yeah, the ambulance came and you were OK, and didn't need it per se. HOWEVER, if it hadn't come you would have needed it - desperately, and would probably have had an asthma attack, and may have DIED.

It's almost certain that the ambulance being there made you feel better. I mean, how many times have you been ill (for a few weeks!) and gone to the doctors. And then before you even start taking the meds you receive, you feel better. The relief of knowing someone is helping you, you have the suitable meds for your condition, or the ambulance/paramedics/first response team is there, often means the difference between still being in pain and suffering, and actually DYING.

A friend of mine went on a trip to a town 50 miles away last summer, and when she got there she went to use her blue/Ventolin asthma inhaler as she felt a bit wheezy after walking up a steep hill. After a few minutes of searching, she realised she had forgotten her blue inhaler/Ventolin.

She immediately started panicking, her chest started tightening, and she started wheezing, and started to perspire, and went ghostly white.

Her mother who she was with, got her to a pharmacy within 10 minutes, and they dispensed an emergency inhaler. She calmed down immediately, and never even opened the inhaler. Just knowing she had it, calmed her down.

Same thing happened to the OP in my opinion. The paramedics being there helped her and calmed her down. If they had not come, her family could be organising her funeral right now.

So this 'friend' needs to fuck right off. Hmm As a number of posters have said, an asthma attack is no laughing matter; it's literally terrifying, and at its very worst, it will be fatal.