To ask how much "me time" you get in a week and how you use it?

[pantyclaws]

I'm struggling with juggling stuff around the house, a demanding part time job and two children with various health problems, alongside looking after myself. I get between 1-2 hours "me time" (i.e. not working, looking after children, asleep or cooking/eating) most evenings between 9 and bedtime, and then if we have no plans, a few hours at the weekend when DH takes the children.

This time also has to be used for chores/life admin, anything that needs doing round the house, exercise (ha - what exercise), hobbies, socialising, occasional extra bits of work I need to finish, online grocery shopping etc. Basically everything except parenting and eating.

My mental health isn't good at the moment and I feel a permanent sense of overwhelm and subsequently demotivation on the time I do have - there's just so so much to do, all the time. By 9pm I just want to flop.

Is this just how it is with DC (who don't sleep v well), a DH (who more than pulls his weight but works long hours) and a part time job?

I work 4 days a week, two children, DH who doesn't cook or shop.

I get an hour to myself on the weekend and one school day a week to myself. We've outsourced cleaning and gardening, shopping mostly online.

On my day off I catch up with friends, do a hobby, some domestic things on the to do list and relax. It's self indulgent maybe. I don't care LOL

And is that enough for you Honeybooboo ? Do you feel you get enough me time? Don't you get any time in the evenings? Maybe your children are older so go to bed later.

I'm on the other end of the spectrum - I have way, way too much free time on my hands. I don't have a working-hours job or have a family (just a DH) and I feel I'm not doing nearly enough, I have to starve off depression by filling my days with walking and cooking.

I'd love to get a job, start a family and not have a minute to myself :)

Lots, but I don't think you want to hear that. As my children get older, I have gotten more. How old are your children?

About an hour a day, three days a week (my lunch hour at work). I have a 10 month old velcro baby, and am the carer for partner who doesn't live with us (financial reasons) but who needs a lot of help.

I don't get enough me time; I shower with the baby because despite my best childproofing efforts I can't leave him for 5 minutes unless he's strapped to his high chair. He's a terrible sleeper (getting better as time goes on). Technically I suppose I'm having "me time" right now, since he's asleep and I'm on netmums (but he is attached to my right nipple so it's not like I can do anything). I don't mind so much - he'll only be little for a very short time, and my partner's health is getting better. I'm hoping in the next few months he'll be back to work (partner, not baby) and need me less, and we'll move in together which will at the very least free up my hands for housework.

I don't really. Probably 9pm when kids are in bed and house is looking ok till I go to sleep.

Sometimes I use this time to do overtime for work, so that doesn't count.

I'm currently struggling with stress and anxiety, I was on medication but it's caused my hair to fall out so now I'm on nothing.

Today my DH has taken DS to football for an hour, but I still have DD who is too young to go.

It's ok, they are only young once and we can do this! We got this!!! X

When I was working long hours I realised that my only me time was at the end of a long busy day when I was already exhausted, so like you all I did was flop on the sofa. I grew to resent giving the best of myself to everything else and having nothing left for me. So I went to bed earlier and got up earlier. That way I had time to myself in the morning and I came to treasure that time. That may not work for you but maybe there are tweaks you can make in your routine to get back some time.

I get 4 hours a fortnight when DD is with her dad. Other than that I worked out that I am only on my own for my commute to work, which is only half an hour.

So, on my way to and from work I listen to podcasts or TedTalks that I am interested in. I plan them ahead for the week.

On my every other Sunday sometimes I see friends but other times I buy face masks and hair masks and pamper myself. And sometimes I binge Netflix.

Usually I am ok with this but sometimes it’s not enough. This week I needed a mental health day as I was struggling. I took Friday off work while DD was still at school, I bought myself my favourite breakfast and lunch foods. I did the school run then came home and spent the day alone. I read. I watched a programme I’d wanted to see. I gave myself a pedicure. I napped. And I feel so much better for it.

I have 2 pre-school DC, who consistently resist falling asleep before 9pm, and work 4 days, with a DH who works FT and is studying.

I get zero time most weekday evenings. By the time they are sleep I need to get ready for the next day then straight to bed.

However - I leave the house at 5.30 3 days to go to the gym. I have a pleasant enough commute listening to the radio. I try to get out for a walk and a chat at lunchtimes.

I see my week day off as fun time, not for catching up with chores. So I do fun stuff with the kids and try to see friends as much as poss.

Finally, every couple of months I do go off out for the day on my own or with friends.

It's not as much as I'd like, I don't do as much housework as I'd like to, and I don't get as much quality time with DH as I'd like. But it is enough, for now. I'm assuming it gets better in a few years!

Yeah, quite a bit tbh. I work 40 hours a week but it is wfh so no travelling time. One hour's lunch break a day, plus 2-3 days off. My kids are 10 and 13 and pretty self-sufficient now. I read, watch TV, take baths.

One lie in per weekend (til around 11am). Kids go down to bed around 7pm and I eat after that so maybe from 8.30pm til I go to bed is free.

Once every couple of months they go for 24 hours to a grandparents.

Monday 1hr while ds is at football but I don't do anything for me I go home and do housework.

Tuesday 40min while he is at swimming I tend to read my book while I wait for him.

Thursday 1hr while he is at beavers but I'm usually making tea etc

Proper me time is I go swimming twice a week and ds stays at home with his Dad.

4hrs most Sundays when my ds goes out with his Gran. I tend to go swimming then aswell come home and sort tea.

Evenings usually a couple of hours where i read, crochet, cross stitch and watch tv.

Dh works full time 40+ hours a week and I work 27.5hrs ( school hours) I tend to get all housework, pack lunches, tea etc sorted before ds goes to bed so that I can just relax and not be running around till midnight

No enough. I work 4 long days and have 2 kids and collapse on the sofa exhausted any time between 9 and 10 every night. I suppose officially it's me time until bed but it doesn't feel like it.
I commute by train so have that time too.
That's about it really.

I get that time from about 9 until bed which is usually not long after as I’m so knackered and rarely ever at the weekend. I constantly battle with going to bed really early so I’m not so tired or having time for myself.
I don’t know what the answer to getting more is; wait until kids are older I guess

Nothing regularly at the moment unless you count 9-10pm flopping on the sofa with DH.

In the past I've done a course of pilates on a Saturday morning and I've also had a day a week in school hours, but 80% of that day was taken up with cleaning/shopping/sorting life, so in reality only an hour or 2.

Every weekend and every evening. I absolutely cherish my "me time"

How do I use it? Varies massively. Today I've browsed the internet and completed a job application. I haven't even stepped out of the house. No probs, though, I'll be out before 6 am tomorrow.

That's how it was for years when my DC were small (also poor sleepers and one SEN)though unlike you I just hadn't the stamina to stay awake beyond 9.30pm as DC were both UP!!!! by 4.30-5am every morning.

Soon as they started school I had time to myself. I walked, meditated, started a business, even wrote a book.

These days I work 20-30 hours a week depending on the contract, meditate, do yoga, swim, walk, read, surf the net too much and write. I enjoy it all. Not that keen these days on going to pubs or out for dinner except with family. I prefer to do stuff not just sit and drink or eat.

2 hours a day. Breakfast and WiFi in the Sainsbury's café.

We take it turn to do bedtimes so I get from 7:30 every second evening and from 8:30 in between. I have to go to bed at 10 to be up in time for morning routine.
At weekends I get Saturday mornings and dh has Sunday mornings. We do family stuff all together after midday only.

I'm a single mum and work part time I get every evening from about 7 when DD goes to bed I go to sleep about 11 I think it's loads of time. I do my jobs in the day while DD potters around with me.

Two or three days a week 9-3 when kids are at nursery and school. I work 24 hours a week but often long shifts. I sleep, watch Netflix, go for runs, go to the gym, meet friends for lunch and do housework. Every weekday evening from 7-bed and weekends 8-bed. Occasional weekends away with friends.

I have two days for me. I swim do a gym class Shop for pleasure. Meet friends
Also a little art if I have time.

Wow I love the idea of a day for me every week, but at the same time I don't want to sacrifice time with my children which is the most important thing for me. But then I'm not making the most of the I DO have with them because I'm all over the place.... Gah.

I think if my children went to bed at 7 (and bloody stayed there for 11/12 hours!) And DH was home by then, that would make a big difference. Sleep deprivation definitely plays a big part.

Op. My kids are 11 & 13 so a day for me means 9-3. Not really a day but still amazing what you can get done in that time with no kids around. Even at that age they take up time!!!

Im only working 18 hours tho. I realise I’m very lucky I don’t need to work more.

My week goes something like this.
Monday clean house. Food shop
Tuesday work
Weds gym Other household jobs
Thursday swim shop. See mum etc
Friday see friends. Maybe swim maybe art class
Sat. Family day
Sunday work.

My work days are long and I have an hour commute so can’t achieve a lot in those days. I really admire full time and single mothers. I do t know how they do it.