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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask

52 replies

Namechangetoask2019 · 18/01/2019 17:47

After all your bills are paid how much money you are left with every month?

H and I disagree on how well off we are. After pensions and bills are paid we have about £2200 a month left over. I think that a very healthy disposable income. H things we aren’t as ell off as I think we are. His ideas are slanted by a vey affluent upbringing. Mine was more ‘normal’

OP posts:
AllMYSmellySocks · 18/01/2019 18:36

It's pointless to ask here because you'll get a biased pool of people answering. Some people will have almost nothing left over others might have tens of thousands. People with a moderate amount usually can't be bothered to answer. Some people will also have chosen to greatly increase their bills for example with a huge mortgage or with private school fees. Obviously £2.2k is above average and very comfortable but not unusually high or living in the lap of luxury.

Fightingfit2019 · 18/01/2019 18:37

If I’m lucky £10 (not joking) Make you feel better OP?

CoastalLife · 18/01/2019 18:41

It's just a really pointless thing to ask which is why it always just looks like bragging. I could give you a figure, but it wouldn't tell you anything because you don't know whether I lease a brand new Bentley and am paying off a huge loan for an extension, or whether my bills are as low as possible and I therefore have few necessary outgoings. As an example, my DBro and his wife have good jobs but are not paid silly money. They save a lot every month because they are very careful to keep bills down and are saving for their next home. Conversely, we have a family friend who earns an absolute fortune but cannot manage his finances and is always living on his last penny. His mortgage is enormous, car payments are enormous, private school fees, etc. He is much wealthier than my DB, but if he were to answer your OP he would say "nearly nothing left after bills".

Neverunderfed · 18/01/2019 18:58

But it is irrelevant, as it depends on your expenses and what that excess is compared to it.

Fwiw, knock of standing orders and direct debits, so 'standing bills' if you like, and we have the same leftover. Of course off that then comes food, fuel etc and other variable costs. But for example our mortgage payment is only a 6th of his net income

Snog · 18/01/2019 19:49

Just take a look at that survey that shows you what % of households have more and less money than you in the uk.

WobbleBottomBum · 18/01/2019 20:14

Government calculations say that apart from rent, an adult can live on £70 per week.

That's the basis of their benefits calculations. So that's heating, electricity, transport, food, TV, outings, presents, clothes. £70

You are saying for each of you there is £250 per week for fun, holidays, outings, treats.

Yes, if you have a private jet £250 is what you spend on a Wednesday in duty free but to everyone else it makes you a 1 percenter.

At the very least, you are in the topmost income bracket.

Snog · 18/01/2019 20:57

If you stop hanging out with Phillip Green you will feel richer 😉

HighsandLows77 · 18/01/2019 21:05

OP is your amount after savings? do you have children?

Raspberry88 · 18/01/2019 21:19

For all you know we live in a 1 bed flat and have few hills hence why we have ‘that much left over’

Maybe, but it's still more than many people have even before rent or mortgage and bills. It's an incredible amount of money left over, couldn't even dream of it. After mortgage, bills and essentials we usually have enough for a couple of pub lunches out.

GreenDinosaur · 18/01/2019 23:32

Your disposable income is twice our monthly income before bills!
Fair enough, some people earn lots but your DH is a twat if he thinks that's nothing.

It does depend who you compare yourselves to though.
I feel like we live in a shoebox and are quite poor and compared to everyone we know, that's true but there are plenty of people worse off and I try to remind myself of this.

GreenDinosaur · 18/01/2019 23:34

I do often wish for poorer friends if that makes any sense. I am sick of being looked down on and below our peers.

Maybe that's your problem, get some less wealthy mates to bring you back down to Earth a bit.

WhyDontYouComeOnOver · 18/01/2019 23:44

£3.79

Darkestnight · 19/01/2019 00:18

Noyb

Bellasorellaa · 19/01/2019 00:21

£400 left from my employer
I have another job which is self employment and that varies how much I get

Bellasorellaa · 19/01/2019 00:30

God some of you are so bitter and jealous I don’t have anywhere near what op has but there is no need to insult her
Learn to work hard then maybe you can be where op is what I hope to be one day

JaceLancs · 19/01/2019 00:37

Bellasorellaa - I do work hard!!! For a charity
I have about £100 a week after I’ve paid my bills
Not including food, travel, clothes etc
I have no savings and can’t top up my pension
I’m currently paying £50 a week top up fees for DF in his nursing home
Help out financially DP who is unemployed and where I can help my DC
Hope that makes you and OP feel much better

Raspberry88 · 19/01/2019 08:21

Learn to work hard then maybe you can be where op is
Ha ha! What world do you live in!

WhyDontYouComeOnOver · 19/01/2019 10:04

Learn to work hard then maybe you can be where op is what I hope to be one day

Ahh that's pleasant. I did work hard until I became a cripple in a wheelchair, thanks.

SpoonBlender · 19/01/2019 12:23

Working hard is barely related to making money. You have to be working in an industry that has money, have the right face for the job, be at least one of competent or sneaky, and also lucky.

Don't shit on people who work hard at double jobs all their lives and still have nothing to show at the end of it, by telling them they're clearly not working hard. That's a proper Daily Mail/Rees-Mogg attitude and deserves nothing but contempt.

BishBoshBashBop · 19/01/2019 14:01

Learn to work hard then maybe you can be where op is what I hope to be one day

ODFOD.

I'm sure you enjoy being a GF.

Original poster
Namechangetoask2019 · 19/01/2019 21:45

Spoonbender we are neither sneaky or lucky. We chose professions that are known to pay well and put the hours in to earn within them.

I am aware that everyone works hard and certainly don’t think we work harder than others.

OP posts:
CloserIAm2Fine · 19/01/2019 21:47

YABVU

that’s more than many many people make in w month

Not sure what you hope to gain by pointing out how lucky you are Confused

scissorsandpen · 19/01/2019 21:59

I think another poster kind of answered this. If you earn mega bucks then it’s shit if not then it’s a reasonable sum to be left over and way more than the average person. It’s all relative as people have said.

Gigglebrain · 19/01/2019 22:00

I'm in the minus every month, and living off a credit card to eat, does that help!

SlowOx · 19/01/2019 22:05

We have a couple of hundred quid left each month. I'd consider us to be comfortable, happy and very lucky with that. Money doesn't buy you happiness.

I'd rather have our £200 left each month and be genuinely happy and content, then have £2,200 and be questioning my life and feeling not well off. I don't envy you or your husband.

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