To think waking up early will solve 99% of my problems!

[Gamechanger12e3]

Someone please help me!
I am single handedly causing my own issues by sleeping in late EVERY MORNING!!

Due to me waking up late.. I'm late for work everyday meaning i always have to work late to make up my hours. This has a knock on affect to my evenings where banks/places are closed by the time i finish work so i have to wait for weekends to run errands. My work is very flexible so they don't care too much.

I always looks like SHIT at work because i literally roll out of bed, into clothes and out the door! Which affects my self esteem!!

I can't arrange morning meetings/appointments because i know I wont wake up on time.

My weekends i wake up super late so waste half the day in bed. Ffs!! I only have a few hours during the day to carry out all my errands!!

I've always been this way. Since a child. I used to be late for school everyday and constantly reprimanded.

I don't know why!! I've been tested by the GP and everything has come back fine. Ive tried going to bed super early/late/reasonable hour. Nothing works!! I've tried setting several alarms on both my phone and manual alarm.. I sleep through them all!!

I think its learnt behaviour. My mother is exactly the same and was always late. She was self employed so never really had consequences for this. She sleeps until noon most days!! Our household was a 'night owl' household. We'd all be awake until early hours despite given bedtimes and then late every morning.

I don't know what to do!! Its ruining my life!! How do i change?? Has anyone else ever suffered the same?!!

If i could just wake up at a reasonable hour 99% of my issues could be resolved!!

How do i discipline myself?!

Has anyone else ever suffered this? Its not normal!! I piss myself off!! I cant rely on myself to do anything morning related which cuts out half my days!!

Someone please advise or give me a kick up the @**!!

my family love their sleep and going to bed early

Going to bed is always a pleasure- always has been in our house even for the kids.
They would often take themselves to bed before bedtime because bed and sleep is such a pleasure,

I used to be like this. I think working full time eventually beat it out of me because I told myself I couldn't be late and eventually I needed an earlier bedtime to cope with getting up. I also set about 3 alarms. I think you just have to be really strict with yourself, pretend the consequences for being late are much worse!

But that's just a list of reasons why morning is your favourite time - which is fine, but not universal. Evening is by far my favourite time of day - it's the time for socialising but also for quiet reflection. Curling up with a book or writing while the world goes quiet is lovely.

I had a job for three years where I had to get up at 5.30 every morning for the commute. I adjusted ok to getting up after just a couple of weeks, but I never got over how depressing it was having to go to bed a couple of hours after I got home. It felt like I had no life or leisure time whatsoever.

LisaSimpsonsbff

OK, I don't have to keep my leisure time for evening.
I can take walks in the wood though the day, morning exercise classes, visites to bakeries when the bread is fresh and warm.

Maybe I would feel differently if I was dragging myself out to work every day.

I’m the same OP. I have to be in work for 9, but even though I live only ten minutes away.

It’s defintely learnt behaviour for me too - because I can get up when I really want or need to.

I’m a night owl naturally but tbh it doesn’t matter what time I go to sleep (and I do fall asleep easily) 9am is my natural waking time. And while I have flexibility in my job there’s no reason for me to change it, so I don’t. Because I have (halfheartedly) tried!

Yes, I imagine it is different if you have all day to do what you like - not many people do!

LisaSimpsonsbff

I have my comittments, but I can choose when to fulfill them.

People really do have very different body clocks. If you've tried everything and you really can't solve it, maybe you just need to organise your life around being a night owl?

Have you tried an old fashioned, mechanical alarm clock - the kind you have to wind up? They're much louder than phones or battery clocks and are still available, though not so easily any more.

I used to put one on the other side of the room - not beside the bed - so I had to get up to turn it off - whenever I had to be absolutely sure of getting up at 3.30 am for work.

Haven’t read the full thread. I used to think like you and tried to force myself to be a morning person. It’s just not happening. So now I’ve just embraced being an evening person. There are lots of good things about it (like not being knackered when I go out).

And also I now love that last 1.5 hours of the working day where everyone has left and I’m super productive and in the zone. I get my best work done then.

(When I tried coming in early it would take me 1.5 hours and several coffees to feel human. It was just wasted time!)

OP
I feel your pain. Ive struggled with this since being a child. Always been a night owl in a world built for larks.

I always put off getting up to the last min & have to rush!

When people say "just get up 10 minutes earlier" you want to stab them haha. It's not that easy but other people just dont comprehend and think you are lazy.

Could say to them "just run a marathon" or "just work all night".

We're all different.
Anyway what ive found helps in general:
*Set ur phone to lowest brightness with blue light filter on at night.
*Herbal 'sleepy' teas as night.
*A good routine (easier said than done and i still always revert back to my 'factory settings' haha...)

For mornings:
Work out whats the absolute quickest u can be out the door then add 5-10 mins to this depending on how long u take to get ready. Then only set ur alarm for this time.
Dont set ur alarm too early- dont kid yourself you will only snooze it til the last min and turn it off by mistake!! And miss out on valuable sleep by keep snoozing!

What works for me: If i need to leave at 8am. I set an alarm for 7.30 and one for 7.40. First one goes off, turn off and enjoy my 10 mins. Second one goes off- GET UP PUT DRESSING GOWN AND KETTLE ON.
Move fast and keep warm. Do not sit or lie back down!

Also if you are really groggy when you first wake have a min of bright screen off ur phone that wakes you.

Sorry for the lengthy post!

I agree with posters about an alarm that makes you get out of bed. That used to work well for me. I just couldnt deal with the ticking clock sound though....!!!

Evening is by far my favourite time of day - it's the time for socialising but also for quiet reflection.

Also, for me, it's when my husband is also free. I like my husband. He's nice. The more hours we spend together, the better, and I'd rather be awake for those hours because he is more interesting than sleep. I find the talk of bakeries, meal prep and making sandwiches rather reductive. Great if that works for you. But I don't think it's a moral failing for people to align their leisure time to when their partners are around. For many of us, an early night equals hardly seeing their partner all day. That, to me, is a much greater waste than not making it to the bakery until noon.

Omg some of the replies here 😱 bed by 9pm! What is this craziness! I like to potter and ... do hobbies I guess. That is ridiculously early for sleep. I get in the house most evenings at 8, that leaves an hour for housekeeping, cooking, cleanup, shower... let alone any relaxing or productive stuff.

LifeofClimb

Why crazy?

I love my 9pm bedtimes- I asleep ny 10 and up at 6am every day.

Nothing ridiculous about it.
I start winding down by 7pm. No housework after that time, just time to relax, read, chat.

I don't have to get up at 6am, I choose to.

Could you change job to an evening start? Scientists have found a biological basis for people being night owls or early birds and by forcing yourself to get up early you could reduce your lifespan if it is against your internal rhythm

my body clock slowly alters over the days messing up my sleep patterns, it's a bit like I'm on a 27 hour day than 24. Every now and again I reset my internal clock by staying awake on a Sunday night get to work early then go to bed early.abd get up early.

it works for me, just one day every couple of months I'm sleep deprived during the day.

What time are you going to sleep?

Sorry but I find it a bit gross not showering in the morning before work - to each their own though.

I think you’re just set in your routine so waking up earlier feels awful (especially if it’s still dark outside). Would it be possible to take Nytol tablets to try to get to sleep earlier? You’ll be more inclined to wake up earlier if you’re not missing sleep.

I use my wireless speakers (ue Megaboom) as my alarm - it’s extremely loud and annoying so impossible to sleep through and can’t be easily turned off. The alarm doesn’t turn off by interacting with the speaker, I have to unlock my phone, open the app, close a pop up before finally snoozing the bloody thing. It doesn’t sound that long, but faffing doing that whilst half asleep with a blaring siren alarm in the darkness definitely wakes me up

chopornot blew my mind too. The first 3-4 minutes ARE shit, whatever the time!

I have found that my bed is never as soft, with the optimum temperature as those few minutes before you need to get up. It is a perfect environment just as the alarm goes off.

I found preparing as much as I can the night before for the next day helps and a shower in the morning helps me come round.

I use my phone. There are lots of apps that wake you up in the morning- have a look on the AppStore. Or you could always buy a traditional alarm clock. This is a tad bit too much but my toddlers love to get me up out of my bed every single morning.
I have two young twin children. They constantly keep us on our toes as well. Be strict with yourself. Have you tried the no tech rule or not? It is worth a try. Do you have any curtains or not in your bedroom?

I struggle with this too. It doesn’t help that I only work 2-3 days a week and start at 11, so there’s nothing really making me get up.

I do find getting into a routine is the most important thing. Before Christmas I managed to consistently get up at about 8, which I know for some is late but for me is very early haha, but with all the Christmas things it just got way off track.

Also it’s helpful to track how much sleep you actually need. Using a weekend day to see how many hours you sleep when you don’t have to jump out of bed will give you a good estimate. I need a full 9 hours to be awake and happy, so I’m aiming to be asleep at 11 and up at 8 as after 11 I tend to not be doing much anyway besides maybe watching some Netflix.

Bed at 9? With the various commitments I have, I'm usually eating my dinner then.

I tend to go to bed around 11, read for about half an hour and then get up around 7.30. I set two alarms, one for 7.15 and one for 7.30 which means I feel as though I've had a doze, but in fact I'm just in a light sleep and can get up more easily when the second alarm goes.

When my Dad did his national service, his commander (or whatever) gave him a tip which he used for his whole life: he said "when you wake up, all I want you to do is sit up and put your feet on the floor. You don't have to do anything else, just that." You'd be surprised how psychologically effective it is: you can sit there zombie-ing for a couple of minutes waking up, still comparatively warm and comfy, but having your feet on the floor nudges something in your brain. Til he died you'd see him do it, wake up and immediately swing his legs out of the bed, then sit there blinking for a bit. Staying in a prone position whilst switching off the alarm makes it very difficult for me.

I highly recommend the power of habit book by Charles Duhigg, if you don’t want to read the whole thing you can get some very short summaries online. But I think a key thing is that when you have a really strong habit, you often need more than just willpower to change it.