To have eaten an unauthorised chip?

[discusstin]

I was at a lunch with external visitors and senior staff in the corporate hospitality suite at work. We were given fish and chips and as we were served a colleague leapt up out of her chair and dashed off, saying she would be 'only a moment.' The colleague has form for disappearing for large periods of time as she is extremely busy.

So, we all sat there looking at the food and waiting for her to come back. Time dragged on the and food got colder and colder. I got hungrier and hungrier. And then....

I surreptitiously took a (cold, manky) chip and ate it. Everyone looked at me. The visitors stared hopefully at the most senior member of staff who said "Let's not wait for X to get back, let's continue."

Everyone started to eat and then the most senior person said:

"The problem with social mobility is that you find people in professional positions who just are not aware of correct social conventions due to their upbringing," as she stared pointedly at me.

AIBU to think that my appallingly working class eating of an unauthorised chip is not as rude as her appalling lack of manners in bringing it to everyone's attention in that way?

You were served fish and chips in corporate hospitality with senior managers? Really? Where do you work, Wetherspoons?

YANBU. She's a cunt.

Fuck social conventions. I'm not letting my chips get cold for anything.

I never got this 'Let's all sit awkwardly and look at our food getting cold' thing. I wouldn't want people to wait for me.

It is outing to say where but suffice to say that the corporate hospitality suite is linked to a cafeteria which serves the same food, but on different plates.

That's ridiculous. You maybe shouldn't have taken a chip in a professional lunch setting but it's hardly a class issue.

did she really say that?! In my workplace she would have faced serious disciplinary consequences for such a discriminatory remark.

What an incredibly British anecdote, on every level 😂 YWNBU. I have no idea why everybody was waiting for one colleague anyway.

She sounds like a twat. She probably isn't aware of her twattishness. You should feel sorry for her, if anything. Imagine being her, going through life a ridiculous, snobby twat. That would be horrible.

I'm, proper etiquette for the fancy class is not to wait. If the dish is served cold, then you wait. If the dish is served hot, then you don't wait. Might want to tell her that she's actually being rather low class by sitting there letting the food go cold.

Hmm. Maybe it would have been better to say cheerily to the Most Senior 'Shall we eat?' rather than having a chip.
Her own manners are appalling to call you out in front of the visitors. Who does she think she is?

Well.

I think if it had been me I would have said "I'm sure Jane wouldn't mind if we started - she wouldn't want your food to get cold" rather than just eating a chip.

But I also think your senior person should have said that herself. Idiocy, leaving visitors sitting in front of cold food. That would have annoyed me if I was the visitor.

And regardless of how rude she thought you had been, what she said was (a) outrageously rude itself, and (b) shows that she doesn't understand how manners work herself, because we all know that the most obvious display of poor etiquette is humiliating someone else for not displaying poor etiquette!

In my workplace she would have faced serious disciplinary consequences for such a discriminatory remark.

Yeah, it's well worth making a formal complaint to HR IMO.

*um not I'm.

Also, if I'd been your colleague and had to leave I would have said "Please start without me" as I was getting up.

Fuck that. It's wasteful and wrong to let food go cold. What a twonk.

Surely a far bigger problem with social mobility is that some people don’t realise how awful it is to comment on the manners and behaviours of others.

She made a far worse gaffe than you did. Ignore her, she was being spiteful.

Actually, the rudest person was the colleague who dashed off. She should have said, "please start without me". Her entry in Debrett's is in jeopardy.

Was it an external visitor or someone in your organisation who said it OP? I think the latter but I'm not clear.

Oh is that true @ChrisjenAvasarala ? I like that! Might trundle that one out at some point.

God I thought you were going to say you ate chips off someone else's plate not your own! It would be polite to wait a minute or two for the other colleague to return but silly to let all the food to go cold. Her comment was incredibly rude.

I'd have done the same (eating the chip I mean!).

Colleague who left should have said for everyone not to wait for her though, especially when it's external visitors

Just to clarify, if there are less than 6 or 7 people, then you'd wait for everyone to be served before starting. But if there are lots of people then you can just tuck in, although mostly you follow what the host does. But if someone leaves the table after everyone is served, you don't sit around waiting if the dish is hot.

YANBU, she was crass and rude. What industry are you in?

No way would we have waited in this situation, and I work for a massive company.

@joanmcc someone within the organisation.
Thank you to those who think she was BU not me.

The person who rushed off could have said 'Don't wait for me' which would have been courteous to the visitors, you and the MS.