Teacher in school

[Stepawayfromthecakes]

I’m currently volunteering at a local school as part of a college course - Supporting Learning and Teaching in School. I’m enjoying the college course and working with the children.

The teacher whom I’m working with doesn’t seem to like me at all. I do six and half hours in school each week. I’ll do any task she gives me and I also act as a 1:1 for a child in the class. Mostly she doesn’t speak to me, only speaking to me about school matters, I often don’t get a break or a drink. I’m not to go into the staff room. I sent her a Christmas card and small gift. She didn’t acknowledge it.

I’m not a confident person, full of self doubt. I feel intimidated and I

In my own experience as a student teacher some school staff were welcoming some not. I wouldn't over think it.

Just a thought, but do you try to chat? This can be quite annoying if your head is full of things you're trying to sort out and you can't get a minute to think. I used to work with a TA who talked non-stop about her dogs, horses, what she had for tea, it drove me mad but I did try not to be rude to her. Sometimes I just had to walk out mid-flow, though, just to get anything done.

When I was doing my PGCE a senior member of my department in my placement school hardly spoke to me at all - she was polite enough but no small talk and didn't get to know me. As soon as I got a job there she was very warm and friendly and we're still friends now, 15 years later. She'd just been there a long time, seen lots and lots of trainees etc come and go, and didn't have the time or mental energy to devote to being friendly to everyone. Some people are just like that and it's not personal at all.

So you’ve just come across someone who either isn’t particularly nice... or just as likely, isn’t a fit for you.

My primary child has had 10 teachers so far. 8/10 I have loved. Warmth emanating just from the classroom door drop off. 1/10 I was a bit meh - no issues, just I didn’t warm especially. Current teacher though? Bloody hell, can’t stand her.

All this on the barest of interactions.
Some other parents think current teacher is fab.
One of my favourites, my friend says “but why? She seems up her own arse?”

We’re all just different, and most times you gel and some times you don’t.

The trick is to understand that and be resilient. I very much doubt it’s personal!

And you really need to separate out non issues like the staffroom and hot drinks, because that’s nothing to do with this teacher.

Ellisandra - sorry, I’ve come across as not a particularly nice person? Why?

I think you need to develop broad shoulders and I speak as a supply teacher. Some staff are friendly whilst some are unhelpful, ignore you and seem to resent you being there. As others have said, take a bottle of water with you, get on with your job and just do your best. Do not give up not all staff are like this.

I think Ellisandra meant that you've come across someone (the teacher) who isn't particularly nice.

I completely understand where you're coming from - my confidence too would be pretty knocked by this. Just wanted to come on to encourage you not to give up because of this teacher though - it sounds like you're enjoying the course and time with the kids otherwise, and I think it's fab (and really brave) of you to try something new and outside of your comfort zone. Keep at it, and don't let her bother you - she probably has other stuff going on at home that means she's not being as friendly as she might be/is with others with whom she has an established relationship, but it won't have anything to do with you

So you’ve just come across someone who either isn’t particularly nice... or just as likely, isn’t a fit for you.

Not AS a nice person. It means you met a nice person.

I had a teacher like this when I was doing teacher training (many years ago !) she was really rude and unhelpful, and made it quite clear she didn't want me there. I think she was partly put out at having a student at all (althought she did absolutely nothing in terms of mentoring me and would disappear suddenly for an hour at a time leaving me with a group of 4/5 yr olds and no indication as to when/if she'd be back)
She eventually told me that when she was told she'd got to have a student she picked me (from the two of us who were sent to that school) because I was 'Mrs' and she assumed i'd be older. I was in fact 22 - like others on course - just happened to be married - and she hadn't wanted 'some young girl' so felt I had deceived her somehow !

I talked to my tutor and he kept an eye on the situation - making opportunities for me to take small groups out of the classroom etc to work away from her as she was so unpleasant. Could you discuss things with your tutor?

Don;t think you are doing anything wrong - you aren't, you've just got an unlucky placement. I got through by basically counting the days until my TP in that school was finished. It will finish and if you have another placement in another school, you may (as I did) get a really lovely helpful person. Hang in there

The staff room thing is understandable in this day and age, but there is no call to be unpleasant and ignore people. As a teacher I welcomed students and tried to help them as much as possible, everyone has to learn, and there's no better place to learn than in the classroom.

It takes no time and effort for a friendly hello how are you? And when I had students I set aside time to chat to them and help them with any problems, give them tips etc. That is normal - your teacher's behaviour is not ; so don't let her put you off battle through this placement and get the qualification you want - in the big scheme of things, she is a temporary blip

Sorry - I misunderstood.

Thank you for your feedback. I’m being too sensitive. Thank you for helping me get it into perspective!

You’re training as an SLT. I would have thought part of the idea of having a placement is to be mentored by the teacher. She doesn’t sound very kind. Don’t take this personally.

What are the implications of leaving? I assume the school will give feedback for assessment. You need to ensure you are “passing” this element of your course. I think you should just put up with it tbh if you think you will pass. It’s only a few hours a week. Perhaps get your course leader to contact the school? Perhaps you can find another placem in a different school or another teacher in the current one. Is any of this possible?

My friend is an nqt and her colleague in the other corresponding year group refused to work with her and set her up for failure by not communicating to her - the school was crap on that front as well. She ended up leaving the school to do supply as there was no way of passing her first year to get her full qualification. However this is not going to impact on her as she will get another job and pretty much guaranteed to pass next year....

What my friend said is that the school failed to acknowledge the problem so you may find this school also closes ranks. Idk why this teacher is behaving this way. For my friend it’s because the teacher wanted her mate, who’d just come back to the school from mat leave to get the job.

There will be a reason for her acting this way, which doesn’t have anything to do with you. But you are collateral damage. Ensure you look after you but do not quit your course because of her.

I volunteered in a similar capacity once and no one spoke to me much. As I wasn’t a trainee teacher I think the class teacher saw me as extra ‘work’ for her (having to give me instructions etc. rather than me just getting on with it). I think she was showing her frustration at being landed with another ‘job’ (managing me). It wasn’t nice and actually did put me off qualifying in the end. I found the environment quite unpleasant.

To be honest, you sound a little over sensitive. To me it sounds like she is just busy and not one for small talk. It is unfortunate you can't use the staff room.
If you want a break could you go somewhere off the school site?

If you really want a hot drink but can't go in the staff room. I would just knock and ask someone to make me one. The kettle is usually on in staffrooms.

I think the teacher is just plain rude. No matter how busy she is she should at least have basic manners and say hello, good bye or a smile to acknowledge you. To ignore you shows her in a bad light.
Continue to do what you are asked and put her attitude down to rudeness. Not all teachers are like that. The majority are friendly and pleasant.

Thank you for your feedback. I’m being too sensitive.

You sound nice. Unfortunately there are some people who are not and are unlikely to change. Therefore it's up to you to become more resilient to deal with people like this. It's rubbish, it would be much better if everyone was just a bit kinder and thought about how their actions affected others, but that's never going to happen.

Good luck, I think schools need more people like you.

Do you have a child in the school? Some staff are cagey about parents in the staff room because of confidentiality.

Why can't you have a drink? Why can't you get one at break? Or take one with you?

Have you been told you can't leave the classroom at break time?

You have every right to go in the staff room, I've never heard anything so ridiculous! If you aren't dbs cleared, you need to be accompanied between classroom and staff room.

I confess I can be short with my volunteer, I simply don't have the time for the huge amount of chat she wants and she always chooses to block the door. There isn't time between sending out one class with the next waiting outside. More than happy to chat at lunch and I've set Asa specific meeting time in my free lesson. Could you speak to your teacher/ask for a specific time to chat and ask if there's a problem?

What a shame OP. There is no need for anyone working at the school not to be welcoming and courteous, I don't think you are being unreasonable at all.

I have done a fair amount of parent volunteering in a few schools and always found staff not only pleasant but hugely appreciative of someone giving up their time to help- as it should be.

I'm not sure what the answer is regarding the frosty teacher. Who allocates the class you volunteer in? Could you speak to them maybe?

Our Classroom Assistants had their own, far pleasanter, room for breaks and lunchtimes.

Don't give up - dog deep and keep focused on the end result you're working towards. Make sure you note your own personal achievements to yourself and press on.

Dig deep obviously 😩

Thank you everyone for your views. Quite happy to take constructive criticism! I appreciate you taking the time to post. I’m being too sensitive, I know this deep down tbh!! I’m putting it down to experience and moving on

It's difficult one. But, no, this teacher should not be making you feel unwelcome and feel unable to even grab a glass of water. That's not on.

Who knows what their problem is?! maybe they hate their job, maybe you remind them of someone they dislike, maybe it's a clash of personalities, maybe they didn't want any help, who knows?!

But it shouldn't change who you are. Go in smiling, full of confidence and positivity - even if you don't feel it! Kill them with kindness. But also be kind to yourself, get a drink if you need one and tell them you are taking a break if you want one (and it's convenient, of course).

You can do this! Keep going and good luck!

You have every right to go in the staff room, I've never heard anything so ridiculous! If you aren't dbs cleared, you need to be accompanied between classroom and staff room.
This is clearly not true in all schools. Several people have said this is not possible at their school due to space and confidentiality. She should, though, be allowed to go in to get a drink at a time the teachers are not in there.

The teacher being rude and unfriendly is not nice but it happens in all workplaces unfortunately. There is always one.

There’s a chance they’re either leaving you in the classroom to tidy/prepare for the next lesson, for you to be making notes about the teaching to help you with your studies, or, they’re wondering why you’re not out on the yard chatting to the staff on duty/getting to know the kids. Perhaps expecting you to be independent and use initiative perhaps?
Have you tried asking for advice or complimenting their pedagogy? Some people just love giving advice (the irony of this comment is not lost on me).
Take a flask, have a wander to see the other classes, see who you bump into