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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I have been lied to?

53 replies

Dextrodependant · 12/01/2019 19:37

My BIL is insured on my car because when I bought it I couldn't drive so he drove it back from the car sales place. I have since passed my test.

This means he can borrow it from time to time.

Today was one such time. I had 70 miles of fuel left and I specifically said they would have to put some fuel in as I need to use the car tomorrow and can't afford to put more in until Monday.

The light comes on at 42 miles and I won't drive with the light on. Maybe that's stupid of me but I make sure I have enough fuel which I did have if I didn't let them use the car.

I said this to my sister and my brother in law. I don't usually ask them to put fuel in but I explained about the light and that I don't like to drive with it on.

Well he brings it back and the light is flashing, it stops gauging the remaining miles when the light comes on so no way of knowing if it is just on 42 or if he has been driving with it on for miles.

He says he has put £10 in bit because the light was flashing it didn't register. I said well it's never done that before... He saw oh really, his old car did it all the time.

So knowing I need to use it tomorrow off we go to the petrol station and I put another £10 in, money I haven't really got spare today, lo and behold the gauge creeps up to the exact amount it always does for £10, 127 miles.

So AIBU to take him off the insurance and not lend them the car again because A) they didn't put fuel in when I asked despite using the car several times this week for free, B) thinking I am a mug and I will believe the bollocks that the fuel didn't register C) if I did believe him I would have been driving round tomorrow thinking I have 127 miles (a tenna worth) and would have probably broken down.

OP posts:
AllMYSmellySocks · 12/01/2019 23:04

Definitely take him off. I couldn't be bothered with that - especially the lying.

popcornwizard · 12/01/2019 23:07

Next time he asks just tell him that it's going to the garage to get the fuel gauge fixed. Tell him the same every time he asks.

Original poster
Dextrodependant · 12/01/2019 23:13

@popcornwizard that made me actually laugh and I hope I am brave enough to say it!

OP posts:
BumbleBeee69 · 12/01/2019 23:31

Take him OFF the insurance. He's treating you like an idiot. Flowers

disappointedyetagain · 12/01/2019 23:32

Driving with too little in the tank can sometimes cause a problem with the filter. You're right to not drive it when it shows the warning light.

Can't you say you've lost your key and take "his" spare back?

BobLemon · 12/01/2019 23:38

Regardless of context, returning a borrowed car to someone with the fuel light on is bloody bad manners. LTB. Or, in your case, whip him off the insurance. Cheeky F.

delboysskinandblister · 12/01/2019 23:39

Just tell him you don't want him to use your car again because his gauge of fuel is faulty.

ZogTheOrangeDragon · 12/01/2019 23:47

I would take him off your insurance because the agreement clearly isn’t working for you.

My car does not register fuel if the amount you put in is not enough to get it beyond the warning light being on. So if I have 10 miles left and put in £5, it will continue to say I have 10 miles left and the light will remain on. If I put £20 in, it will say I have 200ish miles and the light will go off. He could be telling the truth but if he is, and your car works how mine does, he was significantly into the reserve fuel when he put the extra in.

Thewifipasswordis · 12/01/2019 23:49

Just say no. Stop being a doormat.

Purpleartichoke · 13/01/2019 00:03

Maybe he put 10 in, but should have put 20.

Regardless of if he is lying or stingy, just don’t let him drive it anymore. He clearly doesn’t appreciate the favor.

Imalittleelf · 13/01/2019 04:18

Someone did a good analogy of being in the red or black of the bank account. So using that fuel tanks have a reserve to help someone get to a petrol station.

Say the fuel tank is on £0 so the light comes on and flashes. But the tank has an overdraft of £10. The car is driven going on Into the overdraft so now -£10. £10 of fuel is added only bringing it back to £0 so the light still flashes until you came along and made it +£10

However it is very bad for the engine to run it into the reserve especially regularly. There is All sorts of crap in the bottom of the fuel tank which when run low that crap gets pulled up into the engine clogging the filters and potentially causing engine problems.

A car shouldn't be run past 1/4 tank ideally to keep the engine only using fresh fuel.

Either way he should have put more in when he saw the light was still on and shouldn't have been sight a tight arse about it. He was only doing as you asked but that is a dick move

daisychain01 · 13/01/2019 05:01

OP just to agree with pp, please don't run it down so low that the warning light comes on. It's a false economy. Not only is it really bad for the engine, but also you need to have fuel in that tank in case of an emergency.

If you leave it so borderline that you're having to worry about whether the light is on and how many miles that gives you, you're not leaving any contingency for a time when the shit hits the fan and you have to use the car reliably without crawling to the petrol station.

My DF was like that, leaving it until the light came on, and I can't tell you how well known he was in our family circle for running out of petrol!

daisychain01 · 13/01/2019 05:03

And you can tell your BIL he's off your insurance. What a selfish dick leaving you in the vulnerable position of being depleted of fuel and giving you the problem of sorting it out.

Justagirlwholovesaboy · 13/01/2019 05:08

Regardless if he’s on the insurance or not, say no to him borrowing it in future unless he learns to pay him way. Tell him sorry gremlins have infected the engine, if he disputes tell him it’s as likely as he put fuel in it the last him he took it out. It’s your car, your rule x

Original poster
Dextrodependant · 13/01/2019 09:21

@Daisychain01 I don't leave it till the light comes on, that was the point, I had plenty of fuel to do what I needed to do today and the light wouldn't have been near coming on, then I fill up on Mondays. I had 70 miles on the gauge, I need to do about 12 today and then fill up in the morning before work.

That's why I asked them to put fuel in.

Their attitude is that even with the light on I still had enough fuel because the light gives you still 30 miles. So therefore they didn't need to put any in.

So even though I had enough fuel to start with, I still had to put more in because regardless of if I have 30 miles or not I still won't drive with the light on. Because I totally agree with what you said.

OP posts:
lifecouldbeadream · 13/01/2019 09:31

He’s an utter CF- I LOVE the ‘fuel gauge being fixed’ line..... you should go with that!

daisychain01 · 13/01/2019 09:46

Can't you just bite the bullet and half fill the tank as a one- off, then just do all your top ups - it just means you have got a higher baseline to work from. That would be how I'd do it anyway but then I have a bit of a thing about fuel and live in a rural area ( I fill it back up to max I'm that paranoid ) i like to have 'full bunkers' as DH calls it.

HoraceCope · 13/01/2019 09:50

Dont be too quick to take him off the insurance, sometimes it works out cheaper for you if you have another name on your insurance.

you could tell him you are taking him off
doesnt he have a car?

daisychain01 · 13/01/2019 09:51

Their attitude is that even with the light on I still had enough fuel because the light gives you still 30 miles. So therefore they didn't need to put any in.

So as long as he's done his journey using your 'Magic Petrol Tank' he's alright Jack.

cushioncuddle · 13/01/2019 10:28

Who paid for the extra to put him on your insurance ? I expect you did.

He should pay for petrol every time he uses it. He should take a note of millage before and after his journey and pay you the fuel for that.

Take him off the insurance. Cars are expensive to maintain and run. He's take advantage.

Original poster
Dextrodependant · 13/01/2019 10:30

@Daisychain01 I put fuel in on a Monday up to about 3 quarters full, then by Sunday it finishes about 1 quarter full. This week I was a bit lower than usual due to getting stuck in traffic picking them up and dropping them off on Wednesday. There had been an accident so it was stop start.
I would have still finished without being anywhere near the light after I had done all of my journeys. 70 miles is 2 bars then flashing.

It is only because they used it yesterday that the light came on. I had ample fuel to do what I needed to do and fill up as usual on Monday.

You seem to think I am just filling up a small amount at a time. That is not the case, I put about 35/40 in every Monday which takes it fairly full and more than covers what I need without ever getting near the reserve.

I don't see the point of having a car if you don't keep more than enough fuel in the tank, what good is it in an emergency then?

BiL said I need to get used to my car and learn how many miles I can go on flashing. So he obviously thinks it is normal to run it right down each time.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dextrodependant · 13/01/2019 10:31

@cushion yes I paid as it was to do me a favour, then just never took him off as apparently it would probably be cheaper with him on although I never tested that theory.

OP posts:
WhirlieGigg · 13/01/2019 10:34

Take him off your insurance and tell him he can’t drive the car any more. He’s a CF!

SisyphusDad · 13/01/2019 10:39

It might be better to just tell him that you've taken him off your insurance. Many insurance companies charge a fee for amending your policy so at best that could wipe out any saving you might make and at worst you could pay for the privilege of paying more for your insurance.

PregnantSea · 13/01/2019 10:41

I don't know your car but I would say you need to consider the slim possibility that he is telling the truth. That's up to your judgement though.

Even so, I would take him off the insurance regardless of whether or not he lied. Just say it was cheaper without him on it and money is tight. He can get his own car if he needs one so often, or he can hire one, or he can get a taxi or a bus. Most adults manage to do one of these things.

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