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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is my teenage son's behaviour normal?

53 replies

hiddenrabbit · 12/01/2019 13:11

DS had a party last night and has since been tagged on instagram in a picture kissing another lad. There are loads of comments on it from his mates and girls as well and all seems to be a bit of a joke being made, how drunk they were etc.

I want to ask him about it, he knows I follow him on instagram but probably doesn't think I use it or would look at his tagged pictures. I have never even considered the fact he might be gay. He has had girlfriends and always seemed very interested in girls and very heterosexual.

Is it normal for teenage boys these days to kiss each other as a joke? Do you think I should ask him about it? He is 16.

OP posts:
GottenGottenGotten · 12/01/2019 13:14

He is 16. He can kiss who he likes.

What do you want to ask?

Kolo · 12/01/2019 13:17

It’s definitely normal for teenage boys to kiss other people. And teenage girls too.

LL83 · 12/01/2019 13:17

My bigger concern would be if he was drunk and regrets kissing boy and now it is on Instagram and everyone knows. If he is comfortable and open then gay or joking I wouldn't be too bothered.

My eldest is 9 so not much experience if this is common sorry.

Sparklesocks · 12/01/2019 13:20

I think it might embarrass him if you ask him about it directly, could you drop into conversation maybe? He just needs to know that you’ll love him no matter who he loves and what him to be happy

Ultramic · 12/01/2019 13:22

Would you have an issue if he was gay?

Original poster
hiddenrabbit · 12/01/2019 13:31

of course I woulnd't have an issue if he was gay, I'm just almost sure he isn't but was wondering whether this was normal ?

He has a girlfriend who had commented on the pic haha. It just strikes me as really odd so was wondering if this is normal nowadays? When I was younger it would never have happened!

OP posts:
BuggyWanker · 12/01/2019 13:34

My husband used to kiss his mates when he was a teenager and occasionally since we got together . He's just comfortable with his sexuality and thinks it's a bit of a joke.

Does it really matter who he's kissing?

Bowchicawowow · 12/01/2019 13:36

My DS who goes through girlfriends like a knife through butter has a picture on Instagram of him kissing his mate. It’s a peck and I wouldn’t care for one moment if he was gay but I am fairly certify it’s high jinks.

MaryBoBary · 12/01/2019 13:43

What on earth would you need to ask? If it doesn’t matter who he kisses then why is this an issue for you? I’d say mind your own business and leave your son to his.

WorraLiberty · 12/01/2019 13:45

I'd be more concerned about 'how drunk they were', than who he chose to kiss at 16.

Pachyderm1 · 12/01/2019 13:46

It’s not abormal. He may well be gay or bi - it’s not at all unusual for people to be out with their friends before their family.

Or, he might just be messing about with his mates. It’s more common for heterosexual girls to kiss their female friends in my experience, but not unheard of for hereto boys to kiss male friends.

Don’t say anything - he’ll tell you in his own time if there is anything to tell.

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 12/01/2019 13:47

Well, it depends. People do all sorts of things when they are drunk.
Maybe it was not a joke though- have you maybe thought of that?

ZeroFuchsGiven · 12/01/2019 13:48

Are we talking tongues or a peck on the lips?

pilates · 12/01/2019 13:49

Is it a peck on cheek or full on the lips?

Ultramic · 12/01/2019 13:49

I wonder if you would have an issue with it though, as I don't think you'd be asking whether your 16yo was normal if he'd kissed a girl.

DoneLikeAKipper · 12/01/2019 13:52

Teenager kisses another teen, stop the presses! Why would this be abnormal in any circumstances? If he was making out with his friend’s cat and posting it online, I’d understand the need to join MN and make a thread about it.

thugmansion · 12/01/2019 13:53

It definitely is the norm now. Same as @Bowchicawowow DS and his best mate have girlfriends coming and going all the time but DS will also give his mate an affectionate kiss and weekends they share a bed too after a night out.

Bowchicawowow · 12/01/2019 13:54

Yes thugmansion there seems to be no problem with sharing beds after a night out. They are all girl mad though Confused

artisanscotcheggs · 12/01/2019 13:55
Biscuit
anniehm · 12/01/2019 14:00

Yes, very common today it seems to be far less confined by gender and sexuality. It's about human beings .... I get lectured at home about how I'm old and don't understand

whatsthepointthen · 12/01/2019 14:09

Im sure this was posted before?

CardsforKittens · 12/01/2019 14:10

Yes, teenagers kiss their friends, male and female. Of course it's normal. Why would you feel the need to ask him about it?

Grubsmummy · 12/01/2019 14:12

Do you mean they were snogging?

I have never ever heard of teenage lads doing this before, i must have been living under a rock! Lol

bluesaturday · 12/01/2019 14:16

It sounds like a jokey kiss between two mates for a picture.

DoneLikeAKipper · 12/01/2019 14:17

Grubsmummy

You’ve never heard of teenage boys snogging? Yes, I think you are living under a rock Hmm.