MIL PARKING AIBU

[Mooey89]

It’s a parking one, settle in.

ExPIL collect DS every other Friday to take him to his dads.
The neighbours opposite are blue badge holders and have a disabled bay.
Neighbour is elderly and has an oxygen tank to carry around and gets out of breath with more than a few paces. They are lovely.

ExPIL are inconsiderate and rude.
MIL has a historic blue badge. She does struggle to walk long distances as she gets tired (overweight). She is very worried that she doesn’t meet the criteria anymore since a hip operation and it’s due for renewal, but she does currently have a blue badge.
They seek out BB spaces even if there’s a non Bb right next door, just out of principle or because they don’t have to pay.

They always park in neighbours Bb space. Even when there’s another one a few spaces away down the road.
Usually, FIL drops MIL off to do the handover, then waits in the car with his paper, often for 10,15 minutes while MiL comes in to collect dS.
This is sitting in neighbours Bb bay.

Just before Christmas there was a stand off because they were sitting in neighbours space when neighbours arrived home wishing to park. Instead of moving they sat there resolutely refusing to budge because ‘we actually have a badge and technically anyone can park here’

Now I know TECHNICALLY they can but they watched little old neighbour struggle
Home with her oxygen tank rather than move a few paces down the road.

I took a Christmas card to neighbours and apologised because I was so embarrassed.

Today they came to pick up DS, and did it again! There was a space two cars in front!!!

There’s no point to this rant because they’ll keep doing it, but AIBU to think they’re inconsiderate and fucking rude?!

Why do handovers take ten to fifteen minutes?

Yes they are, thankfully your contact with them is now limited.

If they experience what a lot of other disabled people have and actually lose their blue badge shortly when they are reassessed (not that others deserve this) then karma may actually prevail for them.

I think I'd be inclined to have DC ready so as soon as they arrive they're off again!

You know, I'd be tempted to report them as no longer needing the badge if at all possible.

I think there is not much you can actually do. As long as you make it clear to your neighbor they are your exPil and you have tried to reason with them then they will be the ones making arseholes of themselves.

They take 10-15 because MIL LOVES to chat, they also often rock up early, like 15 mins early so DS isn’t ready in his coat etc and he’s 5 so takes FOREVER.
And tbf when they’re early I deliveraly don’t rush him because he’s constantly being dropped home very late breaking court order and so I’m petty.
Which I realise is what I’m moaning about them for. 🙈

Have DC ready and waiting by the door, bring him out to them as soon as you see them pull up.

What tossers! If their DS is anything like them then I can see why he is now your ex OP. Do they arrive at a specific time for the pick ups? Maybe have the DCs ready and waiting so that they can be handed straight over when MIL arrives so there is no delay?

Sorry, cross posted with your update

What you can do it so tell them that as they can't respect your neighbour's space, that your ex needs to collect in future.

MIL and Parking - please tell me there's a shoes on/off, shitting workman and wheelie bin angle to all of this !!!!!

If they’re doing your handovers, so you don’t have to, I’d let it ride, because the alternative would be worse.

I'd have ds ready with everything but his coat on 30 minutes before they're due & then be sat at the window waiting for them to drive down the street at which point it would be chuck DS coat on & have him out the door.

You can't stop them parking but you can make it as short as possible.

Can you clarify, does the disabled space belong to your neighbour personally or is it for public disabled parking?

They do the handover because of DV and ex verbally abusing me in front of DS at hand overs - it’s written into the court order that they or his brother do it, because he refused the alternative option of my husband doing it

@KitKat1985 it was put in for them outside their house but it is on the road so I think technically anybody disabled has the right to use it.

@ badlydrawnperson

"MIL and Parking - please tell me there's a shoes on/off, shitting workman and wheelie bin angle to all of this !!!!!"

This.

MiL AND parking in the same thread... settles in with the popcorn.

Wow -- a portmanteau MIL and parking thread. Excellent.
(Genuine, not sarcastic)

Can you clarify, does the disabled space belong to your neighbour personally or is it for public disabled parking?

BB spaces marked on the public highway are for use by anyone with a blue badge.

Hmm, then technically your MIL is within her rights to park there, even though it is a bit shitty of her. Though it sounds like she may not qualify for a disabled badge for much longer anyway.

If it helps I can put my wheeliebin in the disabled bay and make the workman take his shoes off when he comes in for a shit? Don’t worry I don’t have a toilet brush so he’ll leave lots of shit stains to moan about

When I saw the thread title I thought it was some sort of MN bingo game

YANBU though OP, they are being dicks. Hopefully their badge won't be renewed

When you say 'Usually, FIL drops MIL off to do the handover, ' do you mean he drops her off and then parks? If so then the badge may be being misused.

I would have your son ready 15 mins early and when MIL wants to chat say "oh would love to chat but you are parked in the blue badge bay so I'll let you go as quickly as possible. Bye now" every time.

So outside your neighbour's house there is a line and the word "Disabled" next to it, safeguarding her space? That space is for her, not for any random disabled person, I would have thought.