Aibu and a bit tight?

[Coralnails]

Ds 10yo seen some Fortnite bedding in the supermarket while we were just nipping in for some milk.

Now, he's already got 4 nearly new and perfectly nice bedding sets, and I don't seem to be able to get round a shop without one of the dc begging for something they've seen that they absolutely neeeeeed right now.

While we're not exactly living hand to mouth, I am trying to cut back on unnecessary spending due to other priorities. So I said no not today. He kept on, I said he could buy it with his Christmas money if he wanted it that badly. So he did.

Just feel a bit tight letting him buy bedding with his own money.

Not sure if relevant but he is also banned from his Xbox tonight because of the mess I found in his room, repeatedly taking biscuits and toast and leaving a right mess despite being told no food upstairs.

Seen/saw

I would have done the same and money isn’t tight.

It was an unnecessary purchase, seems exactly the sort of thing Christmas money is for.

Yanbu

Yanbu but please do tell me where I can get this bedding?

Perfectly reasonable IMO.

I’m also cutting back on unnecessary spending so totally get you.

I would have done the same. He didn't need it he wanted it doesn't matter that it's bedding

Mmmmm, sounds like he may need to be told no a little more often, he's testing the boundaries.

I don't think you were being tight at all. I wouldn't have brought it either, bedding is more something they 'need', like clothes, but if he had 4 perfectly ok sets already it was quite reasonable to say he could buy it if he wished. He may learn the value of money a little quicker.

YANBU
I have been thinking that when I was a child I would only get things for special occasions, unless I needed them. Yet I buy my child things that he doesn't need probably more often than necessary.
I think he will probably appreciate them more that way tbh

Sounds absolutely reasonable to me! He’s got plenty of decent bedding at home, if he really wants another set that is exactly the sort of thing Christmas money is for

YANBU. Four sets of bedding is more than enough I'm 44 and I've only got two.

It's good for him to see that you can't always just magically buy him stuff.

YANBU.

I would have done the same with my children I think. My main concern for them is that they don’t grow up with the mindset of feels like they need to indulge every whim they have IYSWIM? These days you can hardly go to the park without being encouraged to spend money (ours now sells coffee by one entrance!) and I’m trying to set my kids up to be aware of how we’re constantly being marketed to and to make more informed decisions.

I can see why he’d want that bedding though!

Not sure if relevant but my parents taught me simply that you don’t buy things from the impulse buy racks by the checkout. You just don’t. That must have saved me a fortune over the years (not to mention the benefits to my teeth and health!)

I'm usually the first to go

So sorry, posted too soon.
Yes, I frequently eye-roll at some of the tightness on MN, but it was absolutely fair enough for him to use his own money for this. Bedding it may be, but it still wasn't a necessary purchase.
YANBU.

Actually thinking on it I wouldn't have let him spend even his own money on it. 4 sets of bedding is already overkill I would want them to learn not to needlessly buy things and waste money.

Yabu it not have used it as a carrot.
Buy the bedding and for every week he keeps his room tidy he can have one piece.
Starting with a pillowcase!!

I often gauge how much they want something by if they will use their own money. Perfectly acceptable in this case.

Sounds perfectly reasonable. He certainly didn't need new bedding it, but wanted it, and that seems a nice use of his Christmas money, if he will get pleasure out of it.

No, I think you did the right thing. It wasn't needed and he had his own money to spend on it if he wished. If he secretly comes to the regret the purchase and wishes he had kept his money for other things, he will learn to think twice before asking for stuff. I find my children are a lot more careful about that they spend money on, my own as well as theirs, since they made a few rash purchases with their own money! Like you, OP, I am determined not to buy anything we don't need this year unless it is a gift.

I’d have done the same.

DD (9) often offers to pay for stuff with her own money. Even offered to get an ironing board I really wanted but said was too expensive.

Sounds fair.

The DC's learned at a tender age that if they choose wisely and look after their stuff it retains some resale value.

I would have shamelessly and mercilessly bargained with him, got him to agree to tidy his room, and also to sort out one duvet set and some other stuff to flog on Ebay to pay for it.

Zerofuchs the set is from Asda and having googled it is the cheapest I can find, though out of stock online.

Silver yes you're probably right, I do say no a lot but do give in sometimes.

Darlingnikita I've only got one duvet set as has ds2, though some of ds1s have been gifts so he's ended up with a few.

Aprilshower I didn't think of that, it hasn't been opened yet maybe it's not too late!

Perfectly fine to let him use his own money, I have done similar if it's something the DC want but don't need.

It's not tight. It's teaching them the value of money and I'd have done the same.

If mine had what we considered enough clothes anything else they wanted came out of their own money.

This is exactly what Christmas money is for. To buy things you want but don't necessarily need.