To ask how you split your bills.

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Ie if you have a family and both work full time but have different earnings.

Do you both pay the same or do you go on a percentage of take home pay?

Married/together 16 years, four DC, he works FT and I'm a SAHM/carer for DC with SN. We have a joint account.

All money goes into the joint account and all bills come out of that account on the 1st of the month plus food shopping and money into our savings, the money left is for whoever wants/needs it. He buys what he wants, I buy what I want (plus whatever DC need/want), it is all our money we don't begrudge the other using it. The only consideration we make is to give the other a heads up if we're about to make a large purchase so that they don't think "wtf!?" when they see a large amount on the banking app and as a means of checking it's not going to fuck anything up for the other person, it's a courtesy thing. DH does it more than I do but he grew up poor and his parents were rubbish at budgeting what money they did have so he sometimes has an irrational panic that him buying himself an Xbox game and a Costa will leave us destitute for the rest of the month.

(No DC) We earn roughly the same (my basic is slightly more but DH sometimes gets overtime) and we transfer the same amount into the joint account for all household expenses and holidays and meals out etc as well as savings and then have about the same "play" money for ourselves.

You need some give and take where you have different financial priorities.

My XH and I earned similar, and paid the same amount into a joint account for bills.

However, he wanted a very fancy car on lease and expensive insurance. I owned my 10yo cheap to insure car outright. Therefore, car stuff came out of spends, not bills money.

However, we also had full Sky package when I watched literally zero TV - but I paid half because I didn’t want the kind of relationship where he’d eye up the weekly food shop and say “your salmon is expensive and I’m paying half of it when I don’t like it”.

Sharing a bank account dates back to when wives were just chattel and to be "kept" by the man. We're in the 21st century now and every woman deserves her own money under her own control. And, increasingly with the quality of men out there, we need it incase we have to make a quick exit!

Together 22 years. We have both our earnings paid into a joint account. Everything paid out from this account.
We also have individual accounts and pay ourselves an equal monthly allowance for ‘spends’.
Works brilliantly

All goes into one account. Either of us spends what we like without reference to the other. Been together 24 years.

All goes into one account. Either of us spends what we like without reference to the other

Same. Anything else is just too complicated!

Myself and dp are getting married this year, we have 1 dc and own our own home. Dp works full time and I am a SAHM. We each have our own accounts (his for his wages and mine for child benefit etc). We also have a joint bank account that dp transfers a sum of money into each month. All bills (mortgage/cars/insurances) are paid from his personal account as well as anything personal he wants to buy himself. Anything personally for me comes out of my account. Baby/pets/food/household items come from joint bank account. Any big purchases or days out (dinner/cinema/hotel etc) come from dps account. I have no access to dps finances and some may think our set-up is a bit old-school but dp is much better at money management than I am and he ensures we never go without whilst still looking after our future.

We both pay into a joint account. DH works ft. I work pt, so he pays about two thirds and I pay a third.

The phrase "All money is family money"makes me grind my teeth
I can honestly say Mumsnet is the only place I've ever heard it.

With me and Dh bills and split 50/50. We both put half of the bill money into a joint account for everything to come out the 1st. We then have our money each to so as we please, he has a fancy car on finance which he pays for. He earns a few hundred more than me a month. I prefer it this way, he’s rubbish at saving whereas I’m not. Never argue about money, if he needs me to buy him something I will and likewise. We have no DC so it’s simpler this way.

Same as disquieted . I am not a chattel , we are equal. A chattel is having to ask for housekeeping or a husband keeping his own money and expecting the wife pay for everything for the children. We share everything been together 34 years and married for 29. Never had a single argument about money .

All earned money is family money & goes into the joint account. We transfer an equal amount into our own accounts each month for spending on whatever we want. The amount is equal even though he has always earned a lot more than me & when I was a SAHM. We've done this for 30 years now & it works very well.

Joint account here. Much easier

We just put our money in our joint account and each spend reasonably. I spend more on clothes, he spends more on electronics, we discuss big purchases and if money is tight we both spend less without setting a specific amount.

I suppose it would be different if money were incredibly hard to come by or one of us was just blatantly irresponsible, but I wouldn’t have wanted to marry someone who was irresponsible with money in the first place.

Everything we earn goes into one joint account, DH works full-time and I work part-time. Two kids, together 20 years, never argued about money.

In our 20 years together sometimes DH has earned more than me, sometimes less than me, sometimes nothing. I never expected to be able to spend less on myself just because at that time I happened to be earning less. Same as when DH was setting up his business and earning nothing. He physically couldn't contribute to bills. I didn't penalise him by letting him have less "spending money" either though.

Each to their own but I think in every partnership there is give and take with many things - money, time etc. Luckily DH and myself pool everything. We have many disagreements but this is a basic value we both share.

Sharing a bank account dates back to when wives were just chattel and to be "kept" by the man is a flawed argument, I don't get it.

I earn more than DH by about double. He gives me 50% of household bills only and all bills come off my bank. The rest of his wage is his (which usually gets spent on shite... Xbox points, lunches at work, nights out with friends, junk food in asda)
I pay all bills from my account, put away chunk into savings, pay for holidays, food, anything else we need. Plus I pay the car payment and a few extras. And if (when) DH spends all of his money on shite i always make sure his shite fund is topped up so he can continue on his shite spending spree.
Only reason we don't do joint account is that, in case you haven't figured, DH is abso terrible with money and admits he would dip into a joint account as a licence to spend it all on shite. (I mean all of this in a Light hearted way, mostly lol)

It Works for us.

We don't split finances.

Everything goes into one pot and is family money,

I earn more than DH. We put equal amounts into the joint account each month, which covers mortgage, bills, afterschool club and a bit over, and I do the vast majority of the grocery shopping and clothes for DD etc. DH is more likely to pay if we go out for a meal. I think it works out about even in the end, although we don't work it out in detail. I'm more of a saver and DH is more of a spender, so we don't have savings in joint names or it would burn a hole in his pocket, but if the money's needed, for eg a car that goes, rather than a new PlayStation, it's there.

We pay a relative proportion of our salaries into the joint account to cover all fixed bills (mortgage, utilities etc). The rest is ours to spend as we see fit. When we go to a restaurant etc one of us pays - we've never had any arguments about it. I tend to buy everything for the DCs, he tends to pay for the big shop.

Reasons are twofold - one, he's absolutely hopeless with money. I take control of everything, he just pays his money and is done. I manage everything and allocate savings and yearly bills and emergency fund etc. He wouldn't have a clue what's in the joint account.

And two - and definitely very important to me - I had a joint funds arrangement with my previous long term partner. He was so frivolous with money we ended up seriously - and unnecessarily - in debt. Through him "needing to have" designer furniture and the like which I couldn't care less about. I was young, stupid and idealistic and ended up with half the debt when we split. I admit it has scarred me and I'd never ever let it happen again. This way it doesn't.

Joint account. It's our money, they're all our bills. Both working full time.

I can’t comment on the success of what DP and I do as we’ve only moved in together recently but it’s working well so far. We are trying the 50/30/20 split, so we both have our wages paid into individual accounts, we both pay 50% of our monthly take home pay into a joint account. Then we each pay 20% into our individual savings and have 30% each to spend on ourselves, fuel etc. The 50% of each of our wages covers and bills and outgoings plus a little extra for meals out or to pop into our joint savings. DP earns over twice the amount I do so to us it seems a fair split. I then have a totally separate account that child benefit and child maintenance gets paid into for my DD from a previous relationship, this is spent on things for her such as breakfast club/hobbys/new clothes etc.
I hope that makes sense.

It all goes in one pot here. Married.

We just have one joint account, have done since we moved in together. Savings sometimes have to be in single name e.g. ISAs and pensions. DH earns pretty much all the cash (I worked about 12 hrs a month up until last month). We both have very similar attitudes to money though - verging on boring! I deal with most finances but always discuss in depth e.g. taking out a loan to buy a car or opening a savings account for DC. Neither of us have ever "asked permission" to spend though.