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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bloody parking wars!

77 replies

Damnivy · 08/01/2019 18:29

Another parking one guys! So for background, i live in a very busy road. There are not nearly enough spaces for the amount of cars. Mostly down to alot of driveways and quite a few dissabillity bays. 3 Very close to me. (Just so that you know, I have no issues with people having dissabillity bays). I don't have a drive. And have never had any issues with any neighbour's.

I don't expect to be able to park in front of my house all the time. And often can't. Everyone tries to be thoughtful with parking. Except one! Across the road, a neighbour with a dissabillity bay is such a pain. When his wife leaves for work, he pulls out of the bay and parks on the street. Often in front of my house as I'm on the school run at the time, until his wife gets home, she bibs, he comes and pulls back into disability bay, so she has space to park. Ive ignored this for 3 years.

So ive not long had back surgury, in quite a bit of pain, so parking has been getting to me lately. I don't get my shopping deliverd as have 2 children with severe food allergies and literally need to read everything I buy. Husband's away for work. So get back today with my shopping, neighbour is looking in his boot, parked in front of my house. Nearest space is 6 houses down. Need to carry alot of shopping, still unable to lift much, and have two young children. I stop and explain situation to neighbour, ask if he can please park in his bay so that I can unload car. He told me to fuck off. I'm not intimidated. I tell him he is being very selfish, to this he calls me an entitled bitch. Other neighbour hears this and tells me I can park over her drive while I unload my car. Very grateful.
This evening ive just had the police knock my door. I explained all to the police, they completly took my neighbours side and told me I sound very anti disability!!! Hmm. Basically made me feel like I was being very childish, arguing over parking. I told them I didn't raise my voice, use any bad language, and was polite until I was called names. They told me my neighbour now feels to scared to leave his house. SERIOUSLY!!! I can't belive it. They told me if I have to park 6 houses away then I need to suck it up.

Now I'm confused. Who was being unreasonable? Police think it's me. I feel like asking one time, when he has a perfectly good space to park in isn't that bad. Is it?

OP posts:
MotherOfDragons90 · 08/01/2019 20:18

He was VVU calling you names.

I have to admit we do similar with the parking tho. I’ve often wondered if it’s being unreasonable. Our road is narrow, so you can only park on one side and it’s the opposite to the side our house is on. We have a driveway but only space for one car, so whoever is home first will nab a space on the road so we both have somewhere to park. Then over the weekend we tend to use driveway car for ease, and occasionally do swapovers Blush

I think it’s just the game you play when you don’t have sufficient parking unfortunately. Doesn’t warrant the rudeness on his part tho.

Aaaahfuck · 08/01/2019 20:18

I'd make a complaint about the conduct of the police. Twats

Aaaahfuck · 08/01/2019 20:21

This makes me angry on your behalf!

Ourmaud · 08/01/2019 20:23

Can you not apply for a temporary blue badge? My lc gave me one last year when I was recovering from back surgery- it was only valid for 6 months but was an utter god send

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 08/01/2019 20:30

If what ourmaud says is correct, do that. Then park in the disabled space he has vacated. Useful and satisfying.

mytieisascarf · 08/01/2019 20:31

I also thought maybe he has a pal in the police. So I would be tempted to call your local police station and ask if an official complaint had been made because you find it odd that politely asking someone to use their own space is worthy of a police visit, whereas verbally assaulting a woman with young children is not.

Id also totally cut my nose off to spite my face and buy a very old banger to park outside my house and leave it there FOREVER. mwahahaa!

Original poster
Damnivy · 08/01/2019 20:48

ourmaud oh I didn't know you could do this. Thanks. Might look into it, I'm over the worst now I hope but have another surgury to my back this year so would be useful then! Xxx

OP posts:
CrazySheepLady · 08/01/2019 20:53

He's definitely the unreasonable, and incredibly rude and lying, one!

As a blue badge holder myself, I get very tetchy about disabled parking spaces but even I would have suggested that you park in the disabled bay while you unload your shopping, then quickly move your car long before any possibility of a ticket. However, that bay doesn't belong exclusively to nasty neighbour; anyone with a blue badge can park there, so you might be stopping another person genuinely in need from using it.

Have your phone ready to record any further conversations with that selfish man. I'm happy to call a fellow disabled person selfish when that's what they are.

CrazySheepLady · 08/01/2019 20:55

PS You can also apply directly to your council for a blue badge, you don't necessarily need to be in receipt of the relevant PIP component. There should be info about what to do o your local authority's website.

SillySallySingsSongs · 08/01/2019 21:01

Can you not apply for a temporary blue badge? My lc gave me one last year when I was recovering from back surgery- it was only valid for 6 months but was an utter god send

Varies from council to council.

Ollivander84 · 08/01/2019 21:04

My local council wouldn't and my neighbour was also an arse over it. I had cauda equina and 5hrs emergency surgery

CallMeRachel · 08/01/2019 21:11

I'd report him to the council tbh.

He's basically bagsying a street space leaving his allocated disability space empty to allow his wife to park outside as close as possible.

This is unfair, and to me if he has a disability space he uses it exclusively or loses it.

His wife should have no unfair advantage over street parks than anybody else.

People like him learn how to play the system you can bet he's embellished the incident with a few key fabrications that meant the police had to respond as it was 'disability hate crime.

MulticolourMophead · 08/01/2019 21:29

Unless the signage associated with this particular space has his name on it, then anyone who has a valid blue badge can use the space leagally.

OP, do you know anyone who has a blue badge who wants to come and visit you? Especially if they come along just before his wife is due home?

buckeejit · 08/01/2019 21:30

Yanbu. He's an arse. I'd have to retaliate.....

elvis86 · 08/01/2019 21:42

Don't supposed you're near an airport? See if you can find a mumsnetter with a blue badge who's off on their jollies for a fortnight? 😂😂😂

Technically he's doing nothing wrong. Sounds like a knob though, and that's before he spoke to you like that.

What did you say to the police? I'd have struggled to bite my tongue. As others have said, you can't them out for love nor money where I live!

I'll get flamed for this, but does he seem disabled? Wonder if he's on any benefits...*

*Bore off about invisible disabilities. It's a joke. And he started it.

Cheby · 08/01/2019 22:00

I’d make a complaint to the police I think. This is obviously a malicious report on his behalf, he’s clearly made stuff up and he was the one behaving in an intimidating way towards you.

Hidillyho · 08/01/2019 22:01

I have to admit we do similar with the parking tho. I’ve often wondered if it’s being unreasonable. Our road is narrow, so you can only park on one side and it’s the opposite to the side our house is on. We have a driveway but only space for one car, so whoever is home first will nab a space on the road so we both have somewhere to park. Then over the weekend we tend to use driveway car for ease, and occasionally do swapovers

This is what my neighbors do. It gives me the rage. It’s an unreasonable rage but I can’t help it (I have severe RA and a toddler so it’s inconvenient at best and bloody agony to the point of crying at worst for me, so maybe not so unreasonable)

AuchAyeTheNo · 08/01/2019 22:14

Report him, If you can find out if the car is mobility and have picture proof of it not being used in the disabled bay.

elvis86 · 08/01/2019 22:19

"Report him, If you can find out if the car is mobility and have picture proof of it not being used in the disabled bay."

Are you suggesting that it's against the rules to park a mobility car anywhere but in a disabled space..?

BoneyBackJefferson · 08/01/2019 22:26

I would do two things

first report the police officer's attitude and state your side of what happened and that you are not happy with how you were treated.

Second get a temporary blued badge, and park in bay yourself.

I thin that it has already been covered but check to see which type of bay it is. Some are enforceable some are not.

SillySallySingsSongs · 08/01/2019 22:28

Report him, If you can find out if the car is mobility and have picture proof of it not being used in the disabled bay.

He can park it where he likes. Or are you wrongly saying that disabled people can only ever park in disabled spaces? Hmm

SillySallySingsSongs · 08/01/2019 22:31

Second get a temporary blued badge, and park in bay yourself.

From what OP has said she wouldn't qualify in our council.

dontneedthedrama · 08/01/2019 22:34

I can't believe he called the police and I can't believe they came out and bought his bull shit .

Eliza9917 · 08/01/2019 22:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SillySallySingsSongs · 08/01/2019 22:48

He'd find himself the owner of several and repeated flat tyres if I were the op.

Then it wouldn't take much for the policd to put tos and two together would it?