To tell him to sod off your not having 50%

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I'm in a bit of a conundrum split 6years divorced for 4 I stayed in the marital home paying the full mortgage for the last 6 years. New partner moved in 2 yrs ago with my (with ex) 2 children. House was in major negative equity when he left so divorced without it being sorted I couldn't bear to be married to him any longer! I am now in a position to pay off the mortgage in full and there may be a couple of grand equity up to max 10k. This is because I have be paying the mortgage and the market has gone up to the just under the value of the mortgage when he left. I am loathed to hand over 50% to him of whatever it is he has actively fought to pay the minimum CM he possibly can and only provides the basics when kids are with him (clothes, bus fare, school trips etc all covered by me) due to illness I wouldn't be able work in the same capacity as before so trying to get my ducks in a row. Everything is a battle and I know a solicitor will need to be seen as he will fight for every single penny and tell any lie to get it (divorce was super crazy fun!!) I have the money available to go but need a wee handhold to be strong as my kids deserve it they've been through so much the last while with me being I'll. The thought of going through all the solicitor letters and court process is making me think I should Chuck cash at him and run but reality is my eldest should be going to uni next year and has already been told it up to mum to sort it out 😣 sorry long read but I'm really lost how to approach it

💐 hand hold, no advice sorry

Who owned the house
Who’s names is it in

Can you give some rough figures?

Presuming he contributed to the mortgage while you were together and to the deposit whether you like it or not he is entitled to some of the properties value, although considering you have paid the mortgage alone for 6 years and have the children the majority of the time it should probably be less than half.
Disregard anything above if you have already had a financial settlement where you were awarded the house in which case he has no entitlement to anything.

When you divorced did you have your Clean Break Order finalised too? If so this would have sorted all the finances and house out.

If not and the house is held as Joint Tenants he would be entitled to 50% of the equity in the house. To have this resolved you would need to speak to a solicitor in the family department as to the fact you have paid his share of the mortgage and get an agreement regarding the equity now being entirely yours.

Fingers crossed for you

Joint names
Figures for example: House was worth £75k when he left mortgage about £98k, house worth around £77k compared to others around us and mortgage has £75.5k left on it which I have been offered the full amount to clear with a family loan.

No financial statement in palace couldn't get one easily due to neg equity. He took joint car and anything he deemed "his" I'm not very money oriented but due to a major change in circumstances I'm having to be a bit more selfish and plan for the future incase I'm unable to provide.
I have a wonderful partner who obviously would keep a roof over our heads but this is about me and my own pride (I know pride before a fall)

So currently there’s is £1.5k equity
£750 each

Which will be eaten up if you both have solicitors.

Don’t pay it off until it’s sorted

Write to him - keep a copy

Tell him you’ll pay the solicitor fees if he agrees to sign the house over - send him a copy of recent valuation - ask an estate agent round

It’s not worth fighting over and will cost him money - he’ll probaby agree

I am a reasonably level headed person but I rushed the divorce and am probably going to pay for that now. My ex was an extreme bully and I just wanted rid I didn't really put much though into this and I didn't foresee this money would ever be available to me though I would eventually sell and rent. Life took over and now I'm hear, lesson learned a little too late 🤔

Sort the financials out now. The take the loan to clear the finances

No real advice. Commiserations on having a cunt of an ex, but congrats on getting rid of him when you did.

I think the advice regarding the letter to him (with record) explaining the solicitors fees and go on, sounds positive.

Green tulips it will be a tiny amount of money hopefully but he will fight for it tooth and nail he has form. Have had to get several orders out against him for door step demands for less! Think I need to bite the bullet and speak to the solicitor I'm stressing about something that hasn't happened yet I guess.

As far as he legal bit goes

You effectively have to sell the house as joint people and you buy the house

So you need a solicitor to do the usual searches etc

You won’t need a mortgage if a loan is paying off the house - however you may wish to transfer to mortgage to you and then pay off the loan

Your new partner will also have to sign legal documents to say he will move out of the house is sold and he has no claim in it

Your partner may also be stung for university fees next year as all three of your incomes will be taken into account

Haha lavalamp he was indeed was one of those but I reckon after all this time it's my turn for be a bit of a one and tell him to get over himself!!

Very little in it. If he took it to court with you being the RP, I believe the division would be 1\4 each for you, each child, leaving him with 1\4 of the equity. Some may say 1\3 each for you, both kids leaving him 1\3. Once fees were deducted for solicitors and deed/mortgage amends changes, it would be bugger all and he would owe you money. Judge would take into account the situation when he left and the payments made by you since then.

Explain this and do not pay it off until it is yours alone.

If he kicks off, you could always offer to sell at market price. He would then be expected to cover 50% of the costs incurred, leaving him massively out of pocket.

Cheeky fucker

Really I didn't know about the uni fees! He has went to have several more children so I doubt he'd be stung for much. My current partner doesn't want financial claim to be house but I will make provision for him as I may depart this mortal coil earlier than planned. He has told my eldest DS that he will make sure money is never the reason for him to not go to uni, it would seem my choice in men improved as I aged lol

Oh thank you you lovely people of mumsnet you have settled my mind! The money is from a critical illness policy and I would be loathed to hand over cash because I had the sense to protect the roof over my kids head. Hopefully he will see the light and smile sweetly while signing over the deeds, a girl can dream

You’d better hope he doesn’t find out about that and consider it a proceed of the marriage

That said as you are divorced it may be more straight forward

Just stick to the house and don’t mention it

Seek legal advise but definatley do nit pay the mortgage off whilst you are still joint tenants!

I would be inclined to sell and buy a new home.

A good solicitor would have the court FO take into account you paid mortgage after divorce and valuation would stand as at date of divorce so he may well just roll over rather than pay you half of any neg equity....

I wouldnt let on you have received any money and can now pay the mortgage off either sounds like he soon be after that..

It was a policy taken out in my name only AFTER divorce it's not actually linked to the mortgage so I can do with it what I like. He would have no claim in it 😁

Don’t pay it off until he’s got no claim on the house surely? If he doesn’t know the money is there..

Keep the money quiet.

Draw on MN support and go and see a GOOD solicitor. Phone around tomorrow. Just face it, then you can put it behind you.

Talk to the solicitor about your will and any power of attorney papers you might need to sort out.

Obviously I don’t know your partner, but I wouldn’t be providing for a grown adult that I’d only known a short while when i had children that would need every penny should I die.

I hope you’re shuffling around this mortal coil for many, many years to come x

Can you not just pay it off but leave a few grand owing, so effectively no equity available. Sorry about your illness not the best way to come by a lump sum and l certainly would t want an abusive ex benefitting eitber.

To be honest if we are actually talking about £1500 in equity it may well be cheaper to just give him the £750 than to try and engage solicitors and go to court over such a small amount of money, especially as he is likely to be awarded a proportion of it in any case, meaning the saving could be as little as £250.
Obviously it wouldn't be morally fair on you but sometimes the cost of pursuing legal action is greater than the possible gains from it and in those cases it is probably easier to just accept the easy option.

Oh and just to say be careful as in the legal world another phrase for joint tenancy ownership is 'last man standing' ownership. It overrides whatever is written in any will or whatever so as others have said don't pay anything off until his name is off it. If God forbid anything happened to you, your ex would become automatic full owner of a mortgage free house if you'd not had him taken off.