Am I going to hell?

[limitedperiodonly]

This afternoon I was in Waitrose and picked up a bag of 5 parsnips reduced to 10p from 79p.

When I paid for them at the self-service checkout I realised that the previous shopper, who I hadn't seen, had left 28p change behind.

I pocketed it. I did not hand it in at the counter or leave my name and address and did not put it in the charity box

So unless I am wrong in my calculations, I made 18p out of a Waitrose shopper.

Your bottom will be roasted in the eternal fires of hell... but at least you got some parsnips too.

28p though? What’s the point?

Yes you are going to hell. Theft by finding. You stole 28 pence!

Hell is empty and all the devils are here. Or so Shakespeare tells me.

Yes and the parsnips will be nicely roasted too😂

RedBedRedemption it's the thrill. And it's not 28p, it's 18p.

Yabu and disgusting.

Parsnips? PARSNIPS? (not envy)

Fucking disgusting.

Pay it forward. Leave 18p in the coin collecting receptacle thingy next time you're in the supermarket. Or 5 parsnips.

It's all about the thrills.

What will you spend this windfall on?

I know a mum from DC’s school who found £160 in £20 notes in our local park... and kept it!

Not quite on that level OP.

All adds up. No point leaving it is there.

What will you spend this windfall on?

How much does a scratchcard cost Hushnownobodycares?. I can see the slippery slope

Why 18p? If the previous shopper left 28p then that’s what you took.

OP I'm calling the cops. That 18p BELONGED to someone. You are a Waitrose self service CF.

You are going to hell, and when you get there there will be endless trays of greasy, undercooked lukewarm roast parsnips to haunt you.

A couple of years ago I paid for something at a Sainsburys self service checkout, grabbed my change and realised as I walked out I had about £4 more than I should have had - instanly felt guilty but the previous shopper had obviously forgotten to pick their change up. I think the store manager thought I'd gone a bit dotty when I went scuttling back in and asked if they had a way of finding the customer to give it back

I know a mum from DC’s school who found £160 in £20 notes in our local park... and kept it! shock Not quite on that level OP.

And that's the thing MrsAriadneOliver. When I first met my husband 30 years ago this year, he said his flatmate found £1000 stuffed behind the cistern in the men's toilets of a bar he was working in. He took it and disappeared.

A thousand pounds 30 years ago was really quite a substantial sum. It was obviously some kind extremely dodgy deal and his friend just grabbed it. My husband vacated the flat before anyone came round asking about it.

But we used to play this hypothetical game: how much would you have to risk to make it worthwhile for you to steal?

We used to get into an enormous amount of money

Why 18p? If the previous shopper left 28p then that’s what you took

I did RiddleyW but I owed Waitrose 10p and the previous shopper left 28p which is took so that means 18p, doesn't it?

We used to get into an enormous amount of money

And now you have lowered yourself to be happy with 18p

Why 18p?

Because spent 10p then found 28p. So OP left shop with 18p and parsnips.

You are going to Hell in a shopping basket OP.

But you still stole 28p as you used 10p to pay your debts. You walked away with 18p, but you stole 28p.

I'm calling the cops. That 18p BELONGED to someone. You are a Waitrose self service CF

It's true serialtester. Cuff me now.

"Will you sleep with someone for £1 million?"
"Yes"
"Will you sleep with me for a tenner?"
"No of course not"
"We've already established that you will sleep with me, now we are just haggling the price."

Exchange "sleep with" for "steal money"

No Yulebealrite it's not the principle of the thing, it's the practicalities

I genuinely walked through TESCO self service with a Fresh £38 Ready Stuffed Turkey on Black Friday! The only thing I didn't scan (Not intentional) and my grocery shop was a stupid amount so it didn't look unusually low ... It was only on inspection of my Xmas receipts two days ago I realised what I had done!! I actually feel incredible guilt! ... So I don't think Hell will be YOUR final destination

Well, it seems Limited will have some turkey to go with her parsnips in hell then.