Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think once someone had been off work with stress

227 replies

User10002000 · 30/12/2018 14:13

For six weeks they are unlikely to return. I've got a colleague who's been off six weeks and we are all covering their work. We are unable to start a recruitment process as they are still being paid.

OP posts:
Original poster
User10002000 · 30/12/2018 14:29

I'm a colleague of the same level as the person who's off.

OP posts:
pollypocket85 · 30/12/2018 14:30

OP, then you need to report your current feelings to your manager? I'm surprised you haven't already.

SauvignonBlanche · 30/12/2018 14:34

I imagine having such bitchy and unsupportive colleagues could make their return slower?

cuppycakey · 30/12/2018 14:35

Why would you think such a strange thing?

Of course they could come back. The senior management have absolutely no incentive to arrange temporary cover or rearrange tasks all the time you and your colleagues are covering the work. If the person who is off doesn't return, they are unlikely to be replaced if you keep doing it all.

Take a step back. Let some things fail or it will be you/another colleague off sick with workplace stress next. It's bloody contagious!

Nottoberudebut · 30/12/2018 14:36

I don’t think OP should be scolded for sounding unsympathetic. A workplace should cover long term absence properly with a proper plan, not leave all other colleagues to bare the brunt. This hardly ever happens though. If they are struggling covering all the work then they too could end up going off with stress, I’ve seen it happen many times.

I think 6weeks is quite a short amount of time OP. I find that people who have been off 3months or more tend to not come back. Perhaps that is just the profession I’m in though!

JustHereForThePooStories · 30/12/2018 14:36

I work in HR and do a lot of absence case management. In my experience, about 90% of people are able to return, thankfully.

Dollymixture22 · 30/12/2018 14:37

Six weeks isn’t very long for stress. You are not be8ng very sympathetic- it’s terrible that work related stress is dismissed so often.

Your employer has a duty of care to this person, thupey should be offering counselling to help the person come back to work - and looking at what improvements can be made to stop this happening again.

If you are felling overwhelmed by the increased workload talk to your boss.

joanmcc · 30/12/2018 14:37

Do you get statutory sick pay or enhanced sick pay, OP?

WTFIsAGleepglorp · 30/12/2018 14:40

There are stages of piss takers.

In the NHS, sick people are allowed 6 months leave at full pay, then it goes down to half pay.

Play it right and you get six months off every year.

CosmicCanary · 30/12/2018 14:40

I was off for 6 months with stress. My work place employed agency staff to cover me and to reduce the extra work load on my team.

I have been back 2 years now and have not had a single sick day.

Cheby · 30/12/2018 14:42

OP is picking up additional work. This is fine in the short term but as they are now approaching 2 months it should be addressed. If she had posted ‘I’ve been asked to pick up extra work for no pay for 6 weeks with no sign of it ending’ I’m sure no one would have blamed her for feeling aggrieved. The reason for the extra work doesn’t change the impact on the OP.

Have any of you flagged it as unsustainable with your line manager OP? It’s them who should be addressing it.

Original poster
User10002000 · 30/12/2018 14:43

We get enhanced sick pay.

OP posts:
Touchmybum · 30/12/2018 14:43

Most people do come back. 6 weeks is no time - it takes 4-6 weeks for any medication to start to work, and longer if it subsequently needs to be adjusted or changed. Educate yourself before you complain.

If your workplace is shitty enough that someone is pushed to the extent of taking time off with stress related illness, it could be you next time!

Get a temp. That's what normal workplaces do.

Maybe your team could do a little bit of heartsearching as to why this person might be off. I am sure you wouldn't have too far to look.

Twolittlebears · 30/12/2018 14:45

Sorry to hear about your colleague OP - and the extra work you feel like you're having to take on as a result. As PPs have said, your manager should really look at how to cover your colleague's duties while they're away and shouldn't expect them to be picked up by others if, sadly, your colleague has to be out for an extended period. Your colleague's manager should know how long they've been signed off for.

Many years ago I was hired to cover for someone on long term leave from work stress. I had a short-term contract for the amount of time their GP thought they'd be off for (4 months or so). Then when they needed longer my contract was extended in line with their sick note. When they were ready to return I had to leave - I was there 7.5 months in all. As far as I know they're still in that post. So as others have said, six weeks doesn't sound that long.

Hortonlovesahoo · 30/12/2018 14:46

I've seen the opposite actually. People that have had work related stress and taken enough time off to fully recover, came back fully and were completely engaged.

ChodeofChodeHall · 30/12/2018 14:46

YABU. Many people recover and return to work, especially if the employer and colleagues are supportive. I had two months off with anxiety in 2017 and have been working ever since.

If my colleagues had your attitude, I would have been far more reluctant to go back.

MissRhubarb · 30/12/2018 14:47

Are your work supportive about illness? Do they offer phased returns and counselling for mental health absences? That can make a huge difference to when/whether a person feels able to return. If you are struggling and feeling overwhelmed about the increase in workload you should speak to your manager though.

TheCraicDealer · 30/12/2018 14:48

Our place was in the same situation last year. Colleague had three months off in the end and ultimately made a return to a slightly adjusted role. We had an audit shortly after he went off, so had to tidy the files that we inherited as well as deal with the overall increase in work, in what is already a demanding role. Everyone was sympathetic- we were acutely aware that it could easily be any other one of us. If my employer or our colleagues had had a crap attitude about it it would have really changed my opinion of them.

Cherries101 · 30/12/2018 14:48

In my experience people who are allowed to
take longer off for stress with no stigma / bitchy colleagues gossiping about them, are far more likely to stay with the company. They are also far more likely to be promoted.

MaryBoBary · 30/12/2018 14:52

I was off for 6 months before returning. Illness means they can’t be sacked so of course they are still being paid, as I’m sure you would expect to be if you were ill.

StuffingSandwich · 30/12/2018 14:54

I don’t think OP should be scolded for sounding unsympathetic. A workplace should cover long term absence properly with a proper plan, not leave all other colleagues to bare the brunt.

I agree.

All that has happened is the work that was most likely the cause of the stress is now being put onto their colleagues who have to manage that on top of their own workloads...

People can have concerns for their own well being and be sympathetic to others.

ChristmasSprite · 30/12/2018 14:58

Yes, OP, VU.
It flies in the face of everything we should be doing to support anyone suffering as a direct result of stress that work has inflicted upon them.

It's a symptom of bad work environment, and needs attending to urgently before anyone else suffers to that extent.

Where's the sympathy, or even guilt that someone got to such a bad place without anyone resolving the situation before it came to this?

ChristmasSprite · 30/12/2018 14:59

If you are suffering OP you need to take responsibility for that and flag it up to your line managers/hr to ensure you don't go the same way.

Nottoberudebut · 30/12/2018 15:04

For goodness sake the OPs attitude is a result of her company not bloody sorting out the extra workload! I’m amazed by the amount of angels on this thread who wouldn’t resent being over worked. I’m sure your halos are sparkling and you would rather work 20hrs a day than dare show any annoyance Hmm

People don’t resent the colleague who is off, they resent the way the work is dealt with.

ChristmasSprite · 30/12/2018 15:08

Absolutely, and therefore be going straight back at the company,not questioning whether absentee will return.. This is where its wrong, as you say nottoberude