Is it me or them?

[baubled]

Normally I know if I'm being u but this time I'm really unsure! Before you read, beware that it's a boring one!

Whenever we've got cards up for birthdays/Christmas DP's mum and step dad always pick them up and read the written messages inside and I always find it a bit rude!

DP and I aren't overly soppy but we will write a little bit of a cringe soppy message sometimes.

His mum just picked up a card from my sister (which in all fairness should have been put away but DP put it up and I hadn't noticed) and read the long personal note written inside, we don't make a habit of writing long paragraphs but we've recently made up from a fall out so it was more to do with that and it made me uncomfortable watching her stand and read it!

I know it's a non issue and I always forget until they do it again but I wouldn't dream of going in to someone's house and reading cards, happy to be told I'm U and it's what people do though because I'm genuinely unaware of what the social norm is around this now!

It's a bit weird, never known anyone else do this and not something I could personally be arsed to do. Humans are inquisitive nosey. If they don't normally spy on you id assume they believe cards are displayed to be looked at?! Use one of those wall card display things next year.

My mum does this- drives me mad!

Everyone I know has admired/looked in cards that are on display on birthdays christmas etc

I do this! I love reading cards

Me and dh keep our cards in our bedroom!

I have never done it but my Grandparents did so wonder if it's a generational thing.

I hate it when people look at my kitchen calendar which is a bit irrational.

My mum does this, and I've told her I think it's really fucking rude and nosy.

My grandmother and sister do this and it is beyond rude. My DP wrote me a very personal Christmas card after we suffered a very private loss a few years back and I wanted to have it out as it was a beautiful card and I found it comforting so I put it up really high - my sister got a chair out to stand on just to have a nosy.

My mum does this. Maybe it's an age thing. I think my mom see them as bring on display and so it's ok to read them.

My in laws do this too , I now always buy anniversary/valentines/birthday cards from bantercards.com .
Most of there cards say swear words or reference sex on the front - this totally puts them off being nosey 😂

I do it if people are opening them in front of me (eg there for the birthday/party etc). Sometimes I look at them when they are up. Isn’t that what they are for??
I can’t say I am that into cards really. I just stack them in a pile waiting for them to go in the bin (although I do save some). I would find them even more pointless if people can’t read them
Also, are some of the answers to the joke ok the inside of the card? It would really piss me off if I couldn’t find out why the chicken crossed the road

My grandmother used to do this. She picked up a card to read from the mantelpiece and dislodged a very expensive antique which crashed to the floor and shattered. She immediately offered to pay to replace it. The replacement was several thousand pounds, she no longer looks at my cards! I wouldn’t dream of looking at messages inside other peoples cards.

If you don't want people reading them then why don't you put them on display somewhere private? I would assume cards on the kitchen table or other public space are there to be read/flicked through

I wouldn't have a problem with it.

I would have thought that cards on display in a house were there to be admired.

Although after reading this thread I will be sure to make sure I never do this in anyone's house.

I do it at my Mum's house but most of them are from family or family friends. I wouldn't do it at a friend's house.

What are they looking for though? It's a greetings card.

It's unbelievably rude. In your own home, you can put your mail wherever you please without people having a snoop. Do you also need to lock your bank statements or do they believe it's an invitation if they are on a table?

I am amazed that people would even think it's remotely acceptable. There's a huge difference between seeing the cover of a card and picking it up to read it? What's next? Reading your emails too?

If you printed out an email or framed a bank statement on your mantelpiece I’d assume you wanted people to see it!

My mother in law does this - even when the cards are valentine cards. Unbelievably nosy and rude.

It's not polite which is why I only do it at MILs when she goes to put the kettle on

I hate this; I would never look inside cards and I don’t see why I should have to hide cards from my DH in my bedroom yet I’m still not keen on others looking at what we say to each other. It wouldn’t occur to me to hide letters when people come over yet I still wouldn’t expect them to flick through them

generally the cards are not opened on the mantel piece, and if I was putting my post on there, I still wouldn't expect people to read them.

If someone wants you to read a card, they show it to you. Otherwise t's just rude.

I'm very surprised that so many people find this rude. I really would be bothered at all.

Meant to say I wouldn't be bothered

But if you don’t want people to read your cards, why do you put them out on display? If the message is so personal and private perhaps they should be displayed in a private room like the bedroom.