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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sorry another one about adults who won’t drive

44 replies

lastqueenofscotland · 27/12/2018 15:33

Adult in question has a driving licence but won’t get a car as they don’t need one yet are begging for lifts on social media most weekends...

Off on a uni reunion next weekend before one person we were all friendly with gets married next year.

Aforementioned adult said they needed a lift, I wasn’t that close to them but said if they could get to X train station I would pick them up and take them.
Assumed i would be dropping them back at same train station. They’ve just announced they thought I was going to drop them to their home and are being really difficult about it.
A) it will add an hour at least on a totally clear run, onto my drive home

B) it involves driving through a city I hate driving in.
C) I’m not a taxi

Aibu to say it’s my way or the highway, and if they continue to be such a spoilt brat about it age 30 they can forget the lift there too.
I probably am but it’s really pissed me off Blush

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 27/12/2018 15:35

No you don’t go out of your way to drop them off and tbh they should contribute to petrol for the whole journey, make that clear before you head off- CF!

MikeUniformMike · 27/12/2018 15:36

Ask for petrol money at 45p a mile.

CottonTailRabbit · 27/12/2018 15:37

You are doing a favour and they are being difficult? Bollocks to that. In what way are they being difficult?

Brummiegirl15 · 27/12/2018 15:37

Not at all.
Say, "hey cheeky fucker, more than happy to pick you on the way, at x train station, but due to (insert reason) I'm going to have to drop you at the same station otherwise will add another hour"

Grace212 · 27/12/2018 15:37

fine to tell them what you said - they are being a total arse.

Lordamighty · 27/12/2018 15:38

YANBU send them your A, B & C and tell them to make other arrangements if it doesn’t suit them. Work out how much money you will want for petrol & get it in advance or stop off at the petrol station at the start of the journey & get their half.

HolyMountain · 27/12/2018 15:39

Cheeky. Fucker.

Tell them it’s your way or fuck right off and find their own way to wedding.

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 27/12/2018 15:39

Cotton they are going on about how the Sunday trains are slower, less frequent etc, how they will be tired for work the next day with all the travelling Hmm

I did get a bit annoyed with them and tell them this Could resolved by them hiring their own car for the weekend (in nicer terms than that) and they have backed down but are being stroppy about it.

Tedious!

OP posts:
Leeds2 · 27/12/2018 15:40

YANBU at all. If it is that important to her, she could hire a car for the weekend.
You would also not be unreasonable to ask for a contribution towards petrol.

Monny1 · 27/12/2018 15:41

Just say forget it.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 27/12/2018 15:42

“Hey don’t want to cause any problems picking you to and from the station, maybe easier if you find another way there that suits you better.
See you at the wedding, can’t wait to catch up”

Done!

CheeseCakeSunflowers · 27/12/2018 15:43

More tiring for you driving than for her relaxing on the train.

cstaff · 27/12/2018 15:44

Jeez some people have no shame. CFery of the highest order.

Sexnotgender · 27/12/2018 15:44

Seeing as my dropping you at the station is inconvenient I’ll just see you at the wedding.

You don’t get to ask favours and then be arsey about it.

Holidayshopping · 27/12/2018 15:45

I wouldn’t be giving them a lift at all after that.

CottonTailRabbit · 27/12/2018 15:46

Stroppy! I really wouldn't stand for that. Especially not if you then have to spend hours in a car together. Send a text. Kill it now.

"This is getting silly. I don't want to fall out over arrangements for a lift. You make your own way there and back so we don't have to have all this bad feeling. I'll see you at the reunion. Bye x"

ReanimatedSGB · 27/12/2018 15:48

What a tiresome person. I don't drive, but make my way wherever I want to go via public transport unless a lift/carshare is offered (and even then I often decline as I would rather travel by train.)

ButteryParsnips · 27/12/2018 15:52

Agree with saying 'doesn't seem like this suits either of us so I'll let you find a better option. See you there'

Puggles123 · 27/12/2018 15:54

I would offer the train station pick up and drop off, or let them know to find another way to get there.

MartaHallard · 27/12/2018 15:59

This is about one particular adult who won't drive, not 'adults who won't drive'. Many adults manage not to drive without imposing on their friends and relatives.

EmpressAdultHumanFemale · 27/12/2018 15:59

YANBU, they're taking the piss. I don't drive because I don't want to, but that means getting places is my problem.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 27/12/2018 16:00

"Why would you assume I'll be driving an hour out of my way to take you home? Bizarre!"

regmover · 27/12/2018 16:01

Definitely your way or the highway. Make it clear in writing, maybe a text, so they can't "misunderstand".

Aeroflotgirl · 27/12/2018 16:02

These are CFs, not all non car drivers are CFs. Tell her that it is out of your way, that you will be dropping her at the train station that you picked her up from. It is up to you to decide if you want to give her a lift, not her. I hour is a lot out of your way, not just 10 mins, no tell her where you are dropping her and that is that!

Aeroflotgirl · 27/12/2018 16:04

Then they have to miss the reunion then! I have missed many school reunion as I just could not get to them easily, that is a fact of life about not being able to drive, very cheeky of them. Their brass neck, would really put my back up and confirm my answer.