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Original poster

To dread New Years Eve

83 replies

Loveweekends10 · 26/12/2018 03:50

I always look forward to Xmas but dread New Years eve months ahead. I think I have almost developed a kind of phobia to it! We did celebrate it with friends last year but that’s a one off as they go away most years. We tend not to get party invites and I feel like we are the odd ones out most years. I wish I could shake this feeling.

OP posts:
AgentProvocateur · 26/12/2018 05:54

Invite people to yours then. Have a party or dinner at home.

ivykaty44 · 26/12/2018 05:57

Have people to yours for drinks 🍷 or just go to bed!

Phillipa12 · 26/12/2018 06:07

I have always hated New Years Eve, its always felt like forced fun. "What do you mean your not going out, you have to, its New years Eve". This year im working as i offered and then im coming home and going straight to bed!

Jozen · 26/12/2018 06:21

I've always hated NYE, it feels like there is enormous pressure to have the best night of your life. I think the pressure has only got worse since the increase of social media.
We treat it like a normal night but the kids stay up later watch a movie or whatever and we'll have nice food and drink eaten in front of the tv.
DH may be up at midnight as per normal but the rest of us are long in bed.

I do like NY Day though. It feels a Sunday where we get things done around the house and then go out for a walk and stop off at the pub.

DinoGreen · 26/12/2018 07:16

Yep, I’ve always hated NYE. We get a takeaway and go to bed early!

whatswithtodaytoday · 26/12/2018 07:22

I've never liked NYE, even when I used to be out partying it was always a bit of a let-down. Everywhere is too busy, everyone is too drunk, it costs money to get into bars you'd normally avoid like the plague, and it's usually freezing cold or raining. No thanks.

We occasionally see friends to do something we'd do anyway (bowling is surprisingly fun as it's dead quiet after about 8pm when the kids go!), or we stay at home and watch crap review of the year type TV. This year I'm pregnant and highly unlikely to be awake by midnight, and that's absolutely fine.

LL83 · 26/12/2018 07:39

You aren't the only one in. I have been invited to a party maybe twice in past 10-15 years. Would rather stay in. Most of our friends are the same.

OliviaStabler · 26/12/2018 07:42

I dislike New Year's Eve as well simply because I can't see what all the fuss is about. It is simply another day and I always hated the pressure to have an 'amazing night'.

I do celebrate occasionally but it is with good friends and usually at someone's house.

MaverickSnoopy · 26/12/2018 07:54

I hear you. I hated it in my twenties. I used to love going out with my friends but NYE was such forced fun that it was inevitably shit. In my thirties DH and I have given up going out on NYE and stay in with an epic Chinese takeaway. The sort that one can dream off - a full on selection with leftovers as well as a bottle of prosecco etc. Sometimes we don't even stay up until midnight. Now one of my favourite nights of the year.

RebootYourEngine · 26/12/2018 07:55

I'm not a fan of New year's eve. I don't see the point in going out and there is always crap repeats on the TV.

I am usually sleeping before midnight.

Danteinferno · 26/12/2018 08:08

NYE is always over hyped in my option. I went out lots a a teenager / young 20s ... pretty much the same vibe as a normal night out just for 2/3x the price!

I quite liked it when I had DS1 so I had an excuse to be “boring” and stay home with TV and a takeaway Wink

We’ve just had DS2 and I’m so excited to use the oh we have a baby excuse again 😂 takeaway, US office and early night (baby permitting) perfect NYE

Original poster
Loveweekends10 · 26/12/2018 08:12

I agree that I used to like it when I had the small child excuse. Now we have got the added pressure of tennagers asking what we are doing. I just feel more pressure!

OP posts:
Taffeta · 26/12/2018 08:19

We found it’s good to spend it with another like minded family

In the past we’ve been to the cinema and/or out for a casual meal with them, home by about 10.30

This year they are having a small gathering at their house

The only bit I’m Hmm about is “having” to stay up til midnight

Kokeshi123 · 26/12/2018 08:20

If most people you know are going away for NYE, this suggests that a lot of them will just be with their SOs and nobody else. So, why not do the same?

369thegoosedrankwine · 26/12/2018 08:25

I'm not a big New Year's Eve fan either.

I like celebrating in the day and removing the pressure. Dh and I will probably take our sons bowling or to the pictures then out for pizza. Home for about 8 then bed whenever I feel like it.

2018 has been one hell of a year so I am actually glad to see the back of it and welcome 2019.

MysweetAudrina · 26/12/2018 08:30

What's not to like, the year is over you can let it go. It's a bank holiday the following day. There is no pressure unlike Christmas (which I love) and you can just do whatever you want. I normally do nothing and treat it like a normal night. Sometimes we say what our high point and low point of the year was. I have never had an expectation of the night so am never dissapointed.

greendale17 · 26/12/2018 08:35

I've always hated NYE, it feels like there is enormous pressure to have the best night of your life. I think the pressure has only got worse since the increase of social media.

*^What pressure? You really are paranoid. There is no pressure from anyone

Original poster
Loveweekends10 · 26/12/2018 08:38

Thankyou greendale17!

OP posts:
Upsy1981 · 26/12/2018 08:41

For approx the last 14 years (maybe more) we have spent NYE with a specific group of our friends. Sometimes other friends or family have joined in. Kids have been born and added to the fun. New partners have arrived. People have married but the core group remains the same. We usually go to one of our houses, buffet or, takeaway, drinks etc very chilled, not a massive thing, just friends getting together. If we didn't celebrate with them, I'm not sure what we'd do!

ToffeePennie · 26/12/2018 08:44

I get you. We usually order a massive (£50+) Chinese buffet, eat with the kids, put them to bed and then stay up watching crap on telly and eating our way through the rest of it. Chilled, relaxed and “us”.
This year we will be with in-laws. I get on with fil, but mil can be a real pain, I like sil, but I don’t like her parenting style or her husband and I find her son (nephew) is appallingly behaved for his age. (My oldest is half his age and copies everything - it takes months to sort out)
I am already tense about it. I really really don’t want to go, but dh has hardly seen his sister so I don’t want to take it away from him. So we are obliged to go....but I’m dreading it

GenerationSnowflake · 26/12/2018 08:45

what pressure? you don't have to do anything, or you can make plans.

You can book a meal in a restaurant/ club.
You can invite friends around.
You can go away for a couple of days to celebrate abroad.
You can get something nice from a deli and a good bottle and stay home.
You can book a sport competition or race or parkrun for New Year's day and have an early night!

gendercritter · 26/12/2018 08:48

I think a lot of people feel exactly the same op.

I think if you're getting anxious about being asked what you're doing, a good response is 'we don't celebrate NY for various reasons. We like taking an evening to be with the family'. If I've said that to people they don't question it. I've even responded 'I find it difficult' at times and not been questioned about that. People aren't that interested in anyone but themselves at the end of the day Wink

I grew up feeling like everyone else was popular and had a huge party to go to and some people do but so many people struggle socially and have no friends or a small number of them. It's no failing on your part if you haven't got a long list of invites. You have worth however popular you are.

If it's a really big problem spend 2019 making some new friends or just invite one or two other people over for supper next year well in advance.

BitchQueen90 · 26/12/2018 08:49

I'm single so I am always on my own on NYE after DS has gone to bed. It's just another day to me.

SoyDora · 26/12/2018 08:49

We don’t do anything except stay in together with some nice food/drink but I can’t say that I’ve ever felt any pressure to do anything either. Some of my friends go out, some stay in... everyone is different. Sometimes we stay up until midnight, sometimes we don’t.
This year I will either have a newborn or be quite overdue!

gendercritter · 26/12/2018 08:51

What pressure? You really are paranoid. There is no pressure from anyone

That's not really how anxiety works though is it? A lot of people feel worried they're inadequate because they're sitting at home with no invites and it seems like the whole of the rest of the world is out partying. It can bring up a lot from school days if nothing else.

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