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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

...to wonder if my creepy neighbour sabotaged my car?

72 replies

TotalWhittle · 23/12/2018 17:17

I need some objective viewpoints, as I'm not sure if I'm getting paranoid or if something weird is going on here. Blush

I got to know my next door neighbour last year when I was single. He was very interested in dating and so was I initially, but he came on very strong and got extremely controlling very quickly. After we got chatting and swapped numbers, he tried to insist on me seeing him straight away. The last time it happened he asked to see me, I said I was out with friends and he asked to see me when I got back. I said politely that I wouldn't be back until very late and had to go to work at 5am so I wanted to go straight to bed. First he said I should come and sleep with him, then apologised when I said that was way too far, then he tried to insist I just pop in and see him for five minutes so he could apologise. I said no, so he said he'd bought me a "treat" and I just needed to come by and pick it up and then he'd "let me" go home. I told him that wasn't happening. So he watched for me getting home, then came over and knocked, so I ignored him, then he texted to say he'd left my "treats" (that word makes me shudder) on the doorstep! Turned out to be chocolates which I threw in the bin. I told him I wasn't interested after that. He texted me for months begging for another chance, then fell quiet. (I didn't block him as I'd rather he was able to text me than come and knock on my door, but I was politely clear that I wasn't interested.) He completely blanks me now but his expression is always furious when he does.

Now the car stuff: I live in a small group of houses with a secure gate and shared car park. A young single neighbour, around my age, was recently driven out by someone repeatedly putting nails under her wheels and at other times letting her tyres down). She lodged a report with the police but there was no evidence of who did it, and she eventually gave up and moved out. So that was horrible for her (and weird for us all, as we knew it was someone in the estate).

Then weird stuff started happening to me too, after I got a new boyfriend. First, my boyfriend parked his car in one of the two "spare" spaces for two days the first time he stayed over (it's in everyone's contracts that these spaces are first come first served for visitors, and they are almost never used). We were walking to the houses from his car and creepy neighbour bumped into us, looked furious but then ignored us. After that during the day, someone printed a (fake, as it turns out) warning notice, supposedly from the estate management service, saying this was an allocated space and threatening to have boyfriend's car towed unless he moved it. A quick google showed it was printed from a general online generator, but just in case it was actually the management I called them and turns out they hadn't left the notice. We moved the car out onto the next street for future visits anyway, as we thought if someone cared enough to leave threatening notes then they might well be capable of keying the car or something. Thought that was the end of it. But we just found today that someone had let down his tyre (no puncture but totally flat; fine once re-inflated). Again, weird.

Finally, I had a car accident last month. I noticed my steering was a bit "weird" (felt loose?) when I was out driving, but didn't quite register it before turning a corner, losing control and smacking into a tree. I was going an appropriate speed, had just had the car serviced a month earlier (everything was fine) and have never had an accident. Unfortunately I sustained a head injury and the car was written off and scrapped before I recovered enough to think about this sort of thing, so I'll never know if someone tampered with it.

I know these things happen, but with the other things that have gone on and now boyfriend's tyre being let down today, I wonder if the person who victimised my poor neighbour might also be targeting me (and no prizes for guessing who, if so). I'm entirely open to being told I'm paranoid. Grin Thoughts?

OP posts:
slipperywhensparticus · 29/04/2019 10:53

Someone shoved a rock in my suspension spring (above your tyres I'm not sure of its name) my partner at the time went to drive it and it seemed off mechanic came out and decided to take it in on the recovery truck in the process the spring snapped and gashed open the tyre I'm a relatively new driver (very new at the time) I could have killed us all had I drove it the mechanic could not see how it got there by accident he thought it had been deliberately wedged in there cant prove it though

AquarianSquirrel · 15/11/2019 19:42

What happened op? Got to the end and now slightly worried?!

Heartburn888 · 16/11/2019 06:34

Yes please come back and update! Hope you managed to have it resolved!

StreetwiseHercules · 16/11/2019 06:48

Yes, I can fully believe your neighbour is doing this.

StreetwiseHercules · 16/11/2019 07:03

“ YANBU to wonder but the steering can't have failed in that way from tampering.”

It can’t have just failed on its own.

JoObrien7 · 16/11/2019 07:24

@TotalWhittle

Please log this with the police. They take stalking very serious because of the number of women who have been killed by stalkers. I think he is a real threat to your safety. Also getting CCTV fitted outside your house is a good idea I use ARLO

DankGraveGhouls · 16/11/2019 07:31

It would be easy to make the steering become unresponsive by loosening the front wheel hubs. I had this on a van I bought, nearly threw me into a curb 😬

BigBairyHollocks · 16/11/2019 07:32

Also bumping-hope you’re ok OP.

Swishswish26 · 16/11/2019 07:39

I also just read the whole thread and hoping you are ok and it’s been sorted.

atankofskunks · 16/11/2019 08:04

Hope it all resolved itself OP

flobonobo · 16/11/2019 08:22

I know this is an old thread but Op @TotalWhittle I’d secretly install cameras, dead of night without neighbour seeing / knowing.

I think if your gut says it’s the neighbour and he’s being odd, it’s likely him!

If you can’t install cameras I’d casually mention to him, that you have installed multiple covert cameras.

TheVanguardSix · 16/11/2019 09:03

7 months on, folks. Nothing to see here. Go back inside.

TheVanguardSix · 16/11/2019 09:04

And almost a year since the OP first posted.
Why? Why do you people do this?

Sohololopopo · 16/11/2019 09:15

Oh god OP! Me and my mum went on a long weekend away and my alloy nearly fell off! Luckily I took it to the garage as soon as I heard the clinking and he was surprised it hadn’t come off! Still to this day believe it was my ex trying to bloody kill me the prick!

DuchessDumbarton · 16/11/2019 09:21

ZOMBIE THREAD
Why is this in trending?

BustedDreams · 16/11/2019 09:44

Sorry this is happening to you. It’s enough to make you feel you’re going mad and start to doubt yourself. We’ve been there!

Everyone is saying cameras. We’ve had trouble with neighbours. Enough to report to police/council. They initially advised cameras to gather evidence. Because the camera was over a piece of our land which have access rights and the neighbours cited ‘harassment’ because of the camera, we were strongly advised to take it down or we could be arrested for harassment. The neighbours carry on their vendetta with impunity. Yes we had The correct signage up.

oabiti · 16/11/2019 09:55

Go with your instincts.

whinetime89 · 16/11/2019 09:59

This thread is over a year old

NewName73 · 16/11/2019 10:18

FFS. Zombie thread. If you are still around @TotalWhittle I guess one of us would love an update, hope you're OK.

Wehttam · 16/11/2019 10:23

OP I don’t want to unnerve you anymore but this all reads very sinister. You MUST 100000000% get cameras installed, can you see the visitors parking space from your home? Have a camera placed in your window and have the OH park there, sometimes a simple block of cheese in a trap is all you need. Whoever it is doing this should be easy to identify if they take the bait.

Moving may not necessarily solve your problems because if the perpetrator finds your new address it could all start again.

NewName73 · 16/11/2019 10:31

@Wehttam this is a Zombie thread

IdiotInDisguise · 16/11/2019 10:46

Move, he will get a smack on the hand and a bit of inconvenience, and will return to hurt you both with more intent.

You don’t try to outsmart psychopaths, you just stay away of them. Police cannot give you or anyone 24 hr protection against someone who lives next door.

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