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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Those who can, do; those who can’t, teach.

311 replies

Ohdesireer · 22/12/2018 19:48

Is this saying still relevant?
I only ask because I’ve wanted to be a nurse all my life, I never got my GCSE’S and didn’t think I was clever enough.

I’m now mid 20s with two DC (3&4)
I decided at the start of this year I was going follow my dream.
I’m halfway into my GCSE maths, if I pass this then onto an access course for a year then uni.

But I’m put off, I got myself a job in a care setting to gain experience for my application. It’s shift work and my partner also does shift work, he’s the main earner so his takes priority and probably always will.
Trying to figure out shifts is a nightmare, I also narrowly escaped having to work Christmas Day (some CF was going to call in “sick” and I would be the next person in)
The thought of missing out on Christmas Day with my kids is daunting. I know people do it, but they know they have to do it and still choose to work in that job.
I don’t know if I want to be the mum who isn’t home for Christmas.

As my partner already works shifts and weekends, I want the DC to have some stability and a parent who is there on weekends.

I think getting into teaching would be the best option for me, maybe a primary school teacher.

My partners mum is a teacher at a blind college.
She leaves at 8:30am and is home by 5pm Mon - Fri.
Once in a blue moon goes into work at the weekend and even then it’s not a must.
And obviously has half term off.

I’ve looked a lot into nursing and the further I look the more I’m put off. I live in a small city (I’m not even exaggerating when I say, most people think it’s a town) so jobs in nursing are hard to come by unless it’s with the NHS.

I’ve heard the saying “those who can, do; those who can’t, teach”
I haven’t looked much into teaching yet, I’d just like advice if people still think this.

I’m not saying I believe it, I just want to know if others honestly do.

My family never expected anything of me.
My mum always said to me, I’m going to end up pregnant at 18, live in a council house and aspire to nothing. She was correct, this indeed did happen. But I now own my own home. (Nothing wrong with living in a council house, but 90% of them in my area are filled with druggies so not the best environment to bring up kids in)

I feel like if I go into teaching, my family will still think I’ve amounted to nothing. Yes I overthink, but the quote is just stuck on loop in my head and I think I need someone to snap me out of it.

I don’t mean to offend anyone, this is just what has been drilled into my head for years.

AIBU?

probably

OP posts:
goldengummybear · 23/12/2018 10:45

You're a adult woman - why do you care so much about your parents' opinion?

I suspect your friend is a TA rather than teacher. The secondary schools round here open doors at 8:25am so I suspect staff are there 30 mins/1 hour before. Most clubs end at 4:25pm and I assume that teachers will work an hour or two after that. My friend is a TA at a primary school and is paid 8:30-3:30 and leaves school at 4:00 which is more in line with what your friend does.

Regardless of this good luck with your GCSEs and I'm pretty sure you need A-levels before the Access Course.

goldengummybear · 23/12/2018 10:48

With regards to the saying, it if were true then why do people who have no money problems (say football clubs or top athletes) but the services of top coaches?

ClaryFray · 23/12/2018 10:51

Firstly hahahahahsha. Teaching easy. Hahahaha.

It's the most stressed I've been. I'm an anxious ball of mess most days.

That quote makes me laugh, where do you think the people doing the other jobs got the knowledge from... By all means just rock up at the hospital and call yourself a brain surgeon.

user789653241 · 23/12/2018 10:53

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Mrskeats · 23/12/2018 10:55

Biscuit there you go
Also if you haven’t passed GCSE maths what on earth makes you think you could be a teacher?

grasspigeons · 23/12/2018 10:59

I know this isnt what you asked but have yoi looked at other medical things than nursing, like speech and language therapist or occupational therapist. They can be a bit more clinic based with no weekends

user789653241 · 23/12/2018 11:04

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Fluffythrow · 23/12/2018 11:05

Has irvine been on the Christmas sherry?

MNHQ
LilyMumsnet · 23/12/2018 11:09

Hi folks

Can we keep it about MN, please? It's not really fair to derail someone else's thread with arguments from another site.

Fluffythrow · 23/12/2018 11:11

Well said Lily.

whiteworld · 23/12/2018 11:25

I'm halfway into my GCSE maths, if I pass this then onto an access course for a year then uni

Ar you sure about this? What about A levels? If you didn't pass GCSEs first time around, may I respectfully suggest that uni may not be for you? It's not for everyone - and it shouldn't be. If everyone had a uni degree, that would devalue all degrees.

It sounds like you need to think a lot more about what you want and need from a job. Think about about your strengths, your weaknesses, what you enjoy doing and what you need from a job (i.e. regular hours to cover your h's shifts). Do you really want to spend the next 5 years training for a job? It doesn't sound as if you're cut out for either nursing or teaching - they are both vocations. And neither would fit around your h's work.

I'd think a lot more about practicalities and other options first. But well done on getting your English GCSE and studying for your maths one. That will open up more doors to you.

MatildaTheCat · 23/12/2018 11:25

OP in case you are still reading I know two women who, in their forties did access to nursing, then their degrees and then into full and stimulating careers. One was keen to avoid shifts so did community nursing which was more predictable and ended as a senior manager.

It can be done. Nursing is probably a more flexible career than teaching and children adapt very well to having a parent working at Christmas etc.

Go for it and work hardest on losing the need for your parents’ approval- you could be Prime Minister and they’d be critical.

Maryjoyce · 23/12/2018 11:32

Lack of common sense
Lack of ability to look at things from a common sense view point
Lack of understanding of other people’s professions and thinking your better than most others.
Lack of proper experience in the world that often shows through like my friends daughter her RE teacher told her all Buddhist are vegan lol.my friend is Thai and Buddhist and funnily enough dosent know any vegans and when her daughter told the teacher the teacher said she must be a odd kind of Buddhist lol.
In the Same school again the French teacher is English but from Liverpool so without been placeist if such a word exists they can’t understand her in English let alone French (we are a very long way from Liverpool,) then the English teacher is from France lol so the same problem again.so a clear lack of common sense to employ both of them.
Generally live in a different world you could say like politicians out of touch with reality
The only one that seems very sensible and a great help to the students is a lady that has a farm and grew up locally and has world experience to bring to the school from her farm life and from her travelling doing aid work overseas

MissMarplesKnitting · 23/12/2018 11:35

Because nobody from Liverpool could possibly teach french.

And how on earth can a French person teach English!?

Have a Biscuit you absolute tool. Don't be so bloody ridiculous.

(And it's 'you're')

katekat383 · 23/12/2018 11:37

Since ir’s Christmas Xmas Biscuit

katekat383 · 23/12/2018 11:37

...it’s

katekat383 · 23/12/2018 11:39

MissMarplesKnitting

Because nobody from Liverpool could possibly teach french.

And how on earth can a French person teach English!?

Have a biscuit you absolute tool. Don't be so bloody ridiculous.

(And it's 'you're')

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Maryjoyce · 23/12/2018 11:40

Not the point of them not be3n able to teach French I’m sure she could in Liverpool where she’s understood the same as the French lady could in France but the simple fact is neither can speak English well enough to be understood never mind teach a second language

katekat383 · 23/12/2018 11:42

Stirring

AlBeGa · 23/12/2018 11:42

Teacher here. I find your post incredibly insulting. I work my bottom off because I care about the children I teach. Our children deserve educators that care about them and their education not someone who chooses the career because they get Christmas Day off (and on an additional note- I spend a lot of my holidays planning and preparing resources for the coming term as do many of my teaching friends and colleagues).

GrammarTeacher · 23/12/2018 11:52

@Maryjoyce you are talking utter rubbish.

GrammarTeacher · 23/12/2018 11:54

Oh and my qualifications make it look like I went 'straight through'. But I have worked a McJob, data entry, in a record shop and in a hospital A and E department before teaching. Is that enough real world experience?

Rachel0Greep · 23/12/2018 11:58

If nursing was always your dream, look at ways in which you can complete your studies. I'm sure there are many variations in nursing jobs. Not all will require shift work, if that is a stumbling block for you.

Tursiopstruncatus · 23/12/2018 12:40

Irvine, are you OK? How on earth did C8's fairly innocuous post trigger that?

SilverApples · 23/12/2018 12:43

Oh, I feel better now, Mj seems to be basing her opinions on experiences from one school, one teacher and third-hand accounts from a child.
With a dash of an inferiority complex, and some strange ideas about people from Liverpool.
I was expecting a more erudite attack...