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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Those who can, do; those who can’t, teach.

311 replies

Ohdesireer · 22/12/2018 19:48

Is this saying still relevant?
I only ask because I’ve wanted to be a nurse all my life, I never got my GCSE’S and didn’t think I was clever enough.

I’m now mid 20s with two DC (3&4)
I decided at the start of this year I was going follow my dream.
I’m halfway into my GCSE maths, if I pass this then onto an access course for a year then uni.

But I’m put off, I got myself a job in a care setting to gain experience for my application. It’s shift work and my partner also does shift work, he’s the main earner so his takes priority and probably always will.
Trying to figure out shifts is a nightmare, I also narrowly escaped having to work Christmas Day (some CF was going to call in “sick” and I would be the next person in)
The thought of missing out on Christmas Day with my kids is daunting. I know people do it, but they know they have to do it and still choose to work in that job.
I don’t know if I want to be the mum who isn’t home for Christmas.

As my partner already works shifts and weekends, I want the DC to have some stability and a parent who is there on weekends.

I think getting into teaching would be the best option for me, maybe a primary school teacher.

My partners mum is a teacher at a blind college.
She leaves at 8:30am and is home by 5pm Mon - Fri.
Once in a blue moon goes into work at the weekend and even then it’s not a must.
And obviously has half term off.

I’ve looked a lot into nursing and the further I look the more I’m put off. I live in a small city (I’m not even exaggerating when I say, most people think it’s a town) so jobs in nursing are hard to come by unless it’s with the NHS.

I’ve heard the saying “those who can, do; those who can’t, teach”
I haven’t looked much into teaching yet, I’d just like advice if people still think this.

I’m not saying I believe it, I just want to know if others honestly do.

My family never expected anything of me.
My mum always said to me, I’m going to end up pregnant at 18, live in a council house and aspire to nothing. She was correct, this indeed did happen. But I now own my own home. (Nothing wrong with living in a council house, but 90% of them in my area are filled with druggies so not the best environment to bring up kids in)

I feel like if I go into teaching, my family will still think I’ve amounted to nothing. Yes I overthink, but the quote is just stuck on loop in my head and I think I need someone to snap me out of it.

I don’t mean to offend anyone, this is just what has been drilled into my head for years.

AIBU?

probably

OP posts:
UhUhUhDennis · 22/12/2018 19:51

I think you just need to make your own choices and live your own life and stop worrying what your parents or anyone else thinks of you.

AnxiousMcAnxiousFace · 22/12/2018 19:52

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RedHelenB · 22/12/2018 19:53

I think you're in cloud cuckoo land if you think you'll be able to work those hours. Teaching is stressful. However I wouldn't do nursing unless you really want to as again it is stressful There are other jobs you can look into.

brizzledrizzle · 22/12/2018 19:54

What matters is what you think, what your parents think doesn't matter and I doubt they will change their view anyway - I still get pressure from mine to get a top flight corporate job which I don't want. My undergraduate and postgraduate qualifications aren't good enough apparently.

mumonashoestring · 22/12/2018 19:56

I think the most helpful thing you could do is have a long, hard think about just why you're still so concerned about your parents opinion when you've already proven them so very, very wrong?

Their doubts about you have held you back long enough and you've achieved plenty without any support from them, so you don't need their support for this next step. You can do it.

Inferiorbeing · 22/12/2018 19:57

I have a first class degree and had a job offer in economics and turned it down to teach? It's completely irrelevant, teaching is not a cop out career

mimibunz · 22/12/2018 19:57

You have a great deal of self-awareness, which means that whatever you choose to do, you will make a success of it. My husband is a teacher and the cleverest person I know. There’s another saying, If you can read this, thank a teacher. Smile

Littlebluebird123 · 22/12/2018 19:57

I think that saying has negative connotations but for me, it is about not everyone being able to be the top of something but still having something to contribute. For example, if an amazing athlete has trained but been injured, they may make a really good teacher in that field as they know what it takes but can't 'do' iyswim.

But it's a well known fact that teaching is not 8.30am to 5pm and loads of holidays. And you'd need to do a teaching degree to be able to do it. So you're still looking at 4/5 years full time study before you get there.
It's definitely a vocation (part of the reason for such a high departure rate for teachers within the first five years.)
Saying that, not having shift work is certainly easier on the family.

Whynotnowbaby · 22/12/2018 19:57

I am a teacher and can assure you that anyone who thinks that would be wrong but I don’t think many really do. I find teaching hugely rewarding and enjoyable but I think your friend is incredibly lucky if she really works the hours you say. In my experience and that of every other teacher I know, teaching eats up your time and you would need to be prepared to work late into the evenings and at least one day at the weekend to stay on top of it. Having said that you are right that you won’t be called into work on Christmas Day and you will have defined holidays (although you will find yourself in school a lot over those periods or at least working at home). Go for it if you want to be a teacher but not if you want to please others or make a statement.

JennyHolzersGhost · 22/12/2018 19:59

I wonder if you realise how incredibly rude that saying is, OP.

monkeysox · 22/12/2018 20:01

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IWannaSeeHowItEnds · 22/12/2018 20:01

Teaching is something you should do because you have a genuine desire to do the job. If you go into it for the time off, you will be sorely disappointed (am a former teacher - I often spent evenings planning and marking).
Frankly, children deserve better than what you are offering them.

As an aside, this is not an easy option job -you will require good qualifications and a degree (probably a 2:1). You will also have to prove you can actually teach - the qualifications are not enough by themselves.

Sparklesocks · 22/12/2018 20:03

Teaching is hard, hard work and requires passion and dedication. It sounds like you’d go into teaching because nursing is too tough, but it’s not an easy job in any way - and you need more GCSEs and qualifications before you could even get the degree.

Acopyofacopy · 22/12/2018 20:05

If you’re only half way through your maths gcse then you have quite a way to go in order to become a teacher...

SuperPug · 22/12/2018 20:05

Bit of a weird thread title...
I suggest you bother to look up the whole quote so you get the context. I'm not sure how you would handle a degree if you found GCSEs difficult?

student26 · 22/12/2018 20:06

Wow. I’m a teacher. Clearly, educating children isn’t anything to be proud of these days! Long hours, lots of paperwork, working before and after school, plenty of hours at home. I hate the saying, it’s rude and untrue.

SauvignonBlanche · 22/12/2018 20:06

Both teaching and nursing are tough jobs, with not the best financial reward, that you need to really want to do for the other rewards that they offer

EmUntitled · 22/12/2018 20:08

Teaching is not an easy option. The saying is bullshit. There was a thread here earlier about how many teachers quit within 5 years and why. Have a read of that perhaps.

Being a teacher isn't any easier than being a nurse. You wouldn't have to work nights or shifts but it can still be long hours and lots of work. Its a vocation and even harder if it isn't actually what you want to do. If you want a job which isn't shift work, get a job in an office or a bank or something. If you want to be a nurse, do that.

Hohocabbage · 22/12/2018 20:08

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user789653241 · 22/12/2018 20:10

OP, please don't go into teaching if you have no desire for teaching young children to make a difference for them. That's not a kind of teacher I want as a parent.

EmUntitled · 22/12/2018 20:10

Primary PGCE training is also oversubscribed (in my area anyway) so you would need to do well in your degree, have some work experience etc.

noideaatallreally · 22/12/2018 20:10

Yes go into teaching. Any school would be lucky to have you....

echt · 22/12/2018 20:10

If internet randoms is your way of thinking about teaching, you're not cut out for it. Try researching:

getintoteaching.education.gov.uk/how-we-use-your-information
www.prospects.ac.uk/jobs-and-work-experience/job-sectors/teacher-training-and-education/how-to-become-a-teacher

Being there at Christmas and weekends is a poor reason for getting in to teaching, and you'll end up working most weekends anyway.

User0ne · 22/12/2018 20:12

m.youtube.com/watch?v=RGKm201n-U4

echt · 22/12/2018 20:13

UserOne, I was just about to look for that! : o

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