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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed at the assumption everyone drinks?

47 replies

Clover12 · 21/12/2018 20:15

I have never liked the taste of alcohol, though I will drink the odd glass at a fancy meal. The few times I have drank more than a couple of glasses, I've never enjoyed the nauseous feeling or had any desire to get drunk. It's just not my idea of fun.

It seems the world doesn't agree. Every birthday/ celebratory event, I have been given a bottle. I now have about 15 bottles in my kitchen. My secret Santa gave me a bottle, despite most people knowing I don't really drink.

Our company has also given us all a wine membership as a Christmas present, which means for the next few months I will get several more bottles delivered.

I probably sound ungrateful, but I hate the assumption everyone drinks. What about pregnant women/ muslims/ people on certain medidcations/ recovering alcoholics?

OP posts:
hazell42 · 21/12/2018 20:19

My dad just gave me a bottle of champagne. I put it in the fridge next to the bottle he bought me last year.
People assume adults drink alcohol
Like they assume kids like chicken nuggets. Generally true but not always.
Its not the end of the world is it?

NerrSnerr · 21/12/2018 20:21

I don't drink much at the moment and I use any bottles of wine for visitors, gifts to hosts or raffles/ tombolas. Saves me having to buy any.

JamieFraser · 21/12/2018 20:22

Yanbu. My secret Santa today was wine. I'm teetotal. Sigh.

WatchingTheWheels85 · 21/12/2018 20:24

I'm 33 and haven't had a sip of alcohol in over 10 years it just doesn't interest me. But people act horrified when I tell them or say poor you HmmConfused

pointythings · 21/12/2018 20:25

It is a widespread assumption, isn't it? I do drink, but I'm exempt from getting gifts of wine because my late H was an alcoholic. It's a bit of a relief because I drink little and am fussy about what I do drink.

I'd just pass what you get on as gifts.

EmUntitled · 21/12/2018 20:26

Its an easy gift because the majority of people do drink. There isn't any gift which every single person would like - some people don't like chocolate or are vegan, some people have sensitive skin and can't use toiletries etc.

I would use the wine for cooking, regift it or put it on a tombola.

Also it would be slightly different if you were muslim or pregnant or allergic and not allowed to drink. But you said yourself that you do sometimes drink anyway, so its not insensitive for someone to buy you a bottle.

cheesywotnots · 21/12/2018 20:26

I've not drank alcohol for 3 years, I didn't have a problem with it, I just went off if.

Beaniebaby4 · 21/12/2018 20:29

YANBU I can’t drink as 30 minutes later after even a sip I get a migraine. Doesn’t bother me a great deal after an incident when I was a teenager. But hate having to explain it and people still try to force it on me.
Seems all competitions and raffles people do involve winning alcohol too so I don’t bother but I really like winning things Grin

Laiste · 21/12/2018 20:36

YANBU

I do drink JD but I bloody hate wine. I hate the assumption that every adult likes wine, and i hate that it seems that if it's wine it doesn't count in the same way as drinking a can of Stella is. 'Stella o'clock' anyone? No, thought not.

I hate the fact that MIL seems to think that it's impossible to enjoy yourself without alcohol.

Justkeepsmiling12 · 21/12/2018 20:41

Annoying...I'd much prefer a box of tea bags to a bottle of wine or Bailey's

I just smile, say thanks and donate to the kids school fayre.

TedAndLola · 21/12/2018 20:42

YANBU. There's a pretty worrying alcohol problem in the UK, but it's so widespread that everyone thinks it's normal.

icannotremember · 21/12/2018 20:44

You have a large supply of gifts for people who do drink though!

Mummyshark2018 · 21/12/2018 20:51

Re gift it?? I get a lot of stuff I don't want/ need or would use so I usually just give it away.

Processedpea · 21/12/2018 20:52

i don't think people think everyone drinks now, in fact am heartened that it isn't such a massive thing to not drink now.

Arnoldthecat · 21/12/2018 21:02

YANBU ,,British society and culture run on it. I'm the same, i rarely drink save for maybe a glass of wine perhaps once a week with a meal. I dont do pubs,bars,clubs etc,,quite boring in fact. So much is geared toward alcohol consumption...

Shimy · 21/12/2018 21:04

The whole world doesn't assume adults drink. It is an enduring love affair Brits and perhaps Americans as well have with drinking. Although they try and pretend they want to stamp out binge drinking, encourage healthy drinking in moderation, prepare kids for drinking by offering them drinks at home, its all a load of tosh.

Brits can't stop drinking, you only have to add a drink joke to any comedy or gathering infact and everyone's in titters. First thing people like to discuss on a Monday morning at work is how pissed they were over the weekend, its like a competition who can tell the most awful stories about their excessive drinking.
Newscasters/presenters all have their little "on air" stories they sometimes share about being pissed once, (just to sound a bit edgy!)
DC going off to uni? it is expected they are going to get hammered!
You're nervous? you'll be alright after a drink or two.
You snogged/slept with someone's else's partner? to be fair they'd had a few drinks and EVERYONE entitled to that once in a while so its not their fault, just forget it and move on.

I think you've just got to accept it OP, just keep saying politely you don't drink and gift them the bottles back.

YouWereRight · 21/12/2018 21:11

I don't drink particularly, other parents seem hugely keen on pushing alcohol onto me. Every birthday party my dc are invited to offers wine, all raffles, school yard chat is all let's drink! And then talking about wine miscalculations on a Tuesday, sorry, can't relate.

MyPoodleisWorthTenofYou · 21/12/2018 21:13

You can just regift it. I don’t think it’s a personal attack Confused

DanielRicciardosSmile · 21/12/2018 21:15

To be honest, I have to admit a naice bottle of wine is my go-to present if I don't know much/anything about who I'm buying for, with the assumption that, if they don't drink, they'll re-gift it thus saving them money there.

Redcrayonisthebest · 21/12/2018 21:16

YANBU I don't drink and don't see the appeal, a bottle of wine is a huge disappointment as a gift to me. The only thing is that they are very easy to regift and save you a fortune on a host's gifts.

masterandmargarita · 21/12/2018 21:16

I'm not mad on cake, chocolate, bath stuff, make-up - all things I've been given over the years - but no problem I give them to people who like them. Not a big deal.

MyPoodleisWorthTenofYou · 21/12/2018 21:18

Yeah that’s a point. I don’t like chocolate. That’s a very common go to present. I get loads every Christmas. I just gift it on.

It doesn’t make me all woe is me no one understands people who don’t eat chocolate boo hoo where’s my tiny violin Hmm

BottleOfJameson · 21/12/2018 21:19

I think it's just the go to generic gift for someone you don't know well enough to choose for properly - like baths stuff, chocolates that not everyone likes. I would just regift them and keep a bottle or two to offer guests.

thomasthecheekyone · 21/12/2018 21:19

I can pm my address if you want to send it on?

Odiepants · 21/12/2018 21:24

I don't drink anymore. I never liked the taste of alcohol anyway and just got out of the habit over 10 years ago. I don't mind gifts of wine etc as I regift them to friends who do drink. I'd much rather a good box of teabags or posh real coffee.

So just think of the bottles of wine as saving you having to pay out for quick presents.